Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.
--Sue Murphy
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The best dumb and funny bumper stickers and great one liners from Tshirts and graffiti.If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
Help wanted telepath: you know where to apply.
Work is for people who don’t know how to fish.
IRS We’ve got what it takes to take what you’ve got.
Cover me. I’m changing lanes.
If I worked as much as others, I would do as little as they.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder…
24 hours in a day … 24 beers in a case …coincidence?
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked
something.
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.
Don’t hit me. My lawyer’s in jail.
This isn’t burger king, you can’t have it your way.
How can I be overdrawn, I still have checks!
If something goes without saying, LET IT!
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
BEER: It’s not just for breakfast anymore.
I got a gun for my wife, best trade I’ve ever made.
So you’re a feminist…Isn’t that cute, honey!
Anyone can give up smoking, but it takes a real man to face cancer.
I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
Chaos Panic Fear. My work here is done.
I break for..Oh [blip] no breaks.
Horn broken. Watch for the finger.
So many pedestrians, so little time.
A woman with PMS and ESP is a b***h that knows everything.
Real Women don’t have hot flushes they have power surges.
Giving up is for quitters!
When GOD created man she was only kidding!!
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More Funny Questions:
More of the best of those stupid, funny questions for you to think about…Why is an alarm clock going “off” when it actually turns on?
If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them?
Why is Grape Nuts cereal called that, when it contains neither grapes, nor nuts?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawn shop?
Why is it called a “drive through” if you have to stop?
Why does mineral water that has “trickled through mountains for centuries” go out of date next year?
Are part time band leaders called semi-conductors?
Why are Softballs hard?
Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself?
If the professor on Giligan’s Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can’t he fix a hole in a boat?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but people don’t point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why is an electrical outlet called an outlet when you plug things into it? Shouldn’t it be called an inlet
Why do we scrub Down and wash Up?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re both dogs!
Can blind people see their dreams?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Why do banks leave the door wide open but the pens chained to the counter?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when he comes out of the shower, when he doesn’t usually wear any pants?
How come you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
If an orange is orange, why isn’t a lime called a green or a lemon called a yellow?
If a cat always lands on its feet, and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?
Why isn’t there a special name for the tops of your feet? –Lily Tomlin
If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why’s it still #2?
Why is a professional who invests your money called a “broker”?
What color would a smurf turn if you choked it?
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Good morning everyboomie.
The days get longer in Summer time, and this has been a very long day.
It started when the day was a wee little baby, only 3 1/2 hours old.
Now it's in it's twilight hours and about to fade into yesterday.
I wonder how that must feel.
It's a good question to ponder.
I must sleep on it before I start to fade.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
acebook
witter
The joy never ends! 
looney