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The Hump #1023247
07/14/15 09:28 PM
07/14/15 09:28 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
If we cannot live so as to be happy, let us least live so as to deserve it.
Immanuel Hermann Fichte
```````````````````````````



Most of these funny cemetery tombstone epitaphs came from graveyards in the old West, where it was often left to acquaintances or even strangers to choose the words on a tombstone, and where a sense of humor was a survivor tool. Some came from elsewhere in the U.S., and some from England or elsewhere. many of these funny epitpahs are well-documented, and some can still be found. Boot Hill, in Tombstone Arizona, and also Boot Hill, in Dodge City, Kansas, have several preserved.


Here are some of the funniest epitaphs:



It was a Cough
That carried him Off
It was a Coffin
They Carried him Off In

On an attorney’s tombstone:
Goembel
John E.
1867-1946
“The defense rests”

Here lies Johnny Yeast.
Pardon me For not rising.
Ruidoso, New Mexico

Jedediah Goodwin
Auctioneer
Born 1828
Going!
Going!!
Gone!!!
1876

Stranger tread
This ground with gravity.
Dentist Brown
Is filling his last cavity.

Here Lies Jane Smith
Wife of Thomas Smith
Marble Cutter:
This Monument Erected
By Her Husband
As A Tribute
To Her Memory.
Monuments of this style
are 250 Dollars.

Effie Jean Robinson
1897-1922
Come blooming youths,
as you pass by ,
And on these lines do cast an eye.
As you are now, so once was I;
As I am now, so must you be;
Prepare for death and follow me.
Upon which someone scribbled:
To follow you
I am not content,
How do I know
Which way you went.

Here lies Lester Moore.
Four slugs
From a forty-four.
No Les
No More.

Here lies Johnny Cole.
Who died upon my soul
After eating a plentiful dinner.
While chewing his crust
He was turned into dust
With his crimes undigested -
poor sinner.

Bill Blake
Was hanged by mistake.

Here lays Butch.
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger
But slow on the draw.

Here lies a man named Zeke.
Second fastest draw
in Cripple Creek.

Here lies the body of Arkansas Jim.
We made the mistake, But the joke’s on him.

He called
Bill Smith
A Liar

I would
rather be here
than in Texas.

Here lies the body
Of Margaret Bent
She kicked up her heels
And away she went.

He got a fish-bone
in his throat
and then he sang
an angel note.

She was not smart,
she was not fair,
But hearts with grief
for her are swellin’;
All empty stands
her little chair:
She died of eatin’
water-mellon.

Rebecca Freeland
1741
She drank good ale,
good punch and wine
And lived to the age of 99.

Beneath this stone,
a lump of clay,
Lies stingy Jimmy Wyatt.
Who died one morning just at ten
And saved a dinner by it.

here lies AN athiest, John Doe
All dressed up and no place to go!

Here he lies, James T. Carson
He blew up his wife
and was hung for arson.

Here lies the body
of John Round.
Lost at sea
and never found.

And here’s an epitaph with a funny double meaning-
you might have to think about it…
Here lies Barnard Lightfoot
Who was accidentally killed
in the 45th year of his age.
This monument was erected
by his grateful family.

```````````````````````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


Excellent Hump day to ya all. yay


All I got to say is as sure as there's a sun in the sky, it's gonna get hot enough to melt my butter, and smoke my bacon. rolleyes


That would be fine if I wanted boiling butter on everything. duh


Sometimes I like my butter cold. razz


Heck on hot days I like to just rub cold butter all over my body. penguin


blush Did I say that out loud?


On the subject of smoked bacon........ razz


Have a happy day everyone.



joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023256
07/14/15 09:51 PM
07/14/15 09:51 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Let's all get over the hump. lol

Have a great day Boomers.


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023259
07/14/15 10:12 PM
07/14/15 10:12 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Mmmmmmm........Bacon! grin

Have a happy day Joe, SpaceQ and all. I'll be watching James tomorrow afternoon. Yay!!!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: The Hump [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1023295
07/15/15 01:49 AM
07/15/15 01:49 AM
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,226
Washington In the Wet corner
Drmojo Offline
Addicted Boomer
Drmojo  Offline
Addicted Boomer

Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,226
Washington In the Wet corner
Have a nice hump day Boomers wave

Karen catrub


"Horses are smart"

"You never heard of a Horse going broke"
betting on Humans~ Will Rogers~
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023300
07/15/15 02:23 AM
07/15/15 02:23 AM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Hi all!
My dad is much better and he is out of the hospital. yay
He not 100% but he is trying. yes
We are also a mess here in Greece(economic)...
We shall see...
Any way I miss you a lot hearts
Have all a happy day. flowers happydance


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023322
07/15/15 05:31 AM
07/15/15 05:31 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Space, Ana, Karen, Haroula and all. Coffee is on. Haroula glad to hear your dad is doing better. Wishing everyone a great day. wave wave


Gerry
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023331
07/15/15 06:30 AM
07/15/15 06:30 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Hump Day. Danish, French Toast, and Biscuits with Sausage Gravy in the NC. Biscuit Bottoms for L4L. summer


Connie
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023346
07/15/15 08:38 AM
07/15/15 08:38 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers summer

Joe, Hope you find cooling today.

Ana, enjoy your time with James. It's a blessing!

Karen, hope you have a great day today.

Haroula, been praying for your dad and your family. Glad he's out of the hospital.

Gerry, have a great one.

Connie, hope your weather is cooler.

I have a Foster Teen with us for awhile till things resolve in her family. Things going well so far. thumbsup


Gail
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023354
07/15/15 09:34 AM
07/15/15 09:34 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Gail, you are amazing! God bless you for opening your home to help children. You are a special lady.

Haroula, hugs to you. hearts


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: The Hump [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1023360
07/15/15 09:53 AM
07/15/15 09:53 AM
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
Darlene Offline
Adept Boomer
Darlene  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers and hope The Hump day goes easy peasy for all!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!


Woohoo and booyah! smile Have an easy peasy day!
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023362
07/15/15 09:54 AM
07/15/15 09:54 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Happy Hump Day ya'll puppy

We are in the middle of the hottest July we have had in several years sad Only dropping to near 80 in the wee hours of the morning.

I have Seagy's check up this morning and then book cooking followed by supper cooking this afternoon.

Joe, love the tombstones.

Space, hope the hump is happy and the hail is gone.

Ana, have fun with James.

Doc, how are you feeling?

Haroula, I've been following that and wondering about you. Glad to hear you dad is out of the hospital. I hope he continues to improve.

Gerry, thanks for the coffee.

Connie, thanks for the biscuit bottoms happydance

Gail, you are a saint bravo

Darlene, Happy skooshing

Back later wave


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: The Hump [Re: looney4labs] #1023369
07/15/15 10:46 AM
07/15/15 10:46 AM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
Good morning everyone. wave

It's still too early for cognitive thought. tired

Haroula I'm glad your father is better. bravo

Gail good for you. praise I couldn't handle a teen......or anyone younger. blush

I work today and tomorrow from 1:00 till 10:00.

I was looking at our weather forecast, and the next 15 days will be from 96 degrees to 101 with very little chance of any rain. I knew there would come a day when we missed the rain. shocked

The heat index will be hotter of course.

Yesterday I was outside messing with loading and unloading lawn mowers for so long that when I came back in I was soaked with sweat and ready for heat stroke. slapforehead

Lovely weather..... rolleyes

I hope everyone has a super Hump day.


joe

Last edited by gymcandy1; 07/15/15 10:46 AM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023415
07/15/15 04:04 PM
07/15/15 04:04 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
We have a break in the rain and i'm heading out with the doggie. puppy


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023428
07/15/15 04:51 PM
07/15/15 04:51 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Joe, hydrate hydrate hydrate!
Space, have a great walk wave


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: The Hump [Re: looney4labs] #1023430
07/15/15 05:16 PM
07/15/15 05:16 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
We had fun looney. thanks


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023432
07/15/15 05:17 PM
07/15/15 05:17 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
How's the weather there, Space?


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: The Hump [Re: looney4labs] #1023448
07/15/15 07:25 PM
07/15/15 07:25 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
looney,

It is nice right now and a little cool. I actually saw the sun today for the first time in a week. woozy


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023452
07/15/15 08:17 PM
07/15/15 08:17 PM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Hi all. Gail God Bless you. I'm enjoying my day off. I don't have to show up for work until 5:00 tomorrow night. I'm in heaven. smile Ana how was your g'baby this afternoon?

We were supposed to get downpours tonight but I'm still waiting.

Midgei hearts


Just do it.
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023462
07/15/15 08:50 PM
07/15/15 08:50 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Off to bed for me. Sweet dreams all sleep


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: The Hump [Re: looney4labs] #1023463
07/15/15 08:50 PM
07/15/15 08:50 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good night looney. wave


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: The Hump [Re: gymcandy1] #1023477
07/16/15 12:24 AM
07/16/15 12:24 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Just finished priming the bedroom. Twice. Such a project I started but it will be worth it.

James was a doll as always. Hubby spent more time with him than I did, but I got my fill. hearts

Sweet dreams..


Don't feed the Trolls
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