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#1026400 - Yesterday at 07:02 PM Monday Monkey Madness
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30529
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
There are three ages of man - youth, middle age, and 'you're looking wonderful.'
Cardinal Francis Spellman

```````````````````````

Casey McCarthy had just arrived in New York City and was amazed at the enormity of everything.

Having drunk a pint or two on the flight over, he sorely needed to relieve himself.

The first door he entered happened to be a large health club, and he asked the clerk if he might use the men's room.

The clerk said certainly and told Casey the men's room was the third door down the corridor on the left.

Now Casey, trying to appear sober, weaved his way down the hallway remembering some of the directions.

When he reached the third door, he turned RIGHT, opened the door and immediately fell into the deep end of a pool.

The clerk, realizing Casey's mistake, ran down the hall and burst through the door, prepared to save him, and heard Casey shout, "Don't flush, I'm in here!"

`````````````````````````````

Did you hear about the moron who accidentally swallowed some pennies? He asked everyone he passed if they saw any change in him?

````````````````````````````````

A man had been drinking at the bar for hours when he mentioned something about his girlfriend being out in the car. The bartender, concerned because it was so cold, went to check on her. When he looked inside the car, he saw the man's friend, Dave, and his girlfriend kissing one another. The bartender shook his head and walked back inside. He told the drunk that he thought it might be a good idea to check on his girlfriend. The fellow staggered outside to the car, saw his buddy and his girlfriend kissing, then walked back into the bar laughing.

"What's so funny?" the bartender asked.

"That stupid Dave!" the fellow chortled, "He's so drunk, he thinks he's me!"

``````````````````````

"The auditors have just left, sir."

"Did they check the books?"

"Very thoroughly."

"What did they say?"

"They want 15% to keep quiet."

```````````````````````````````

How did you do in your tests ?

I did what George Washington did !

What was that ?

Went down in history !

````````````````````````

What does the 1286BC inscribed on the mummy's tomb indicate ?

The registration of the chariot that ran him over !

`````````````````````


A man named Mr. Smith was flying from San Francisco to LA. Unexpectedly the plane stopped in Sacramento along the way. The flight attendant explained that there would be a delay, and if the passengers wanted to get off the aircraft, the plane would re-board in 30 minutes.

Everybody got off the plane except one gentleman who was blind. Mr. Smith had noticed him as he walked by and could tell the blind man had flown before because his Seeing Eye dog lay quietly underneath the seats in front of him throughout the entire flight. Mr. Smith could also tell he had flown this very flight before because the pilot approached him, and calling him by name, said Keith, we're in Sacramento for almost an hour. Would you like to get off and stretch your legs?"

Keith replied, "No thanks, but maybe the dog would like to stretch his legs".

Now, picture this: All the people in the gate area came to a complete quiet standstill when they looked up and saw the pilot walk off the plane with the Seeing Eye dog! The pilot was even wearing sunglasses. People scattered. They not only tried to change planes, but they were trying to change airlines!

```````````````````````````

Do you like your new baby sister?
She's all right.
Do you play with her?
No, and we can't even send her back because she's been here more than 30 days.

``````````````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


The circle of life, the carnival carousel of fun, the wheel of misfortune, has landed once again on Monday. monky


I'm still dizzy from last week. crazy


The good news is that I am off Wednesday and Thursday again with vacation. penguin


It's getting harder to stay on the ride for a whole week without falling off. razz


Every time I do a little voice inside my head tells me to get up and get right back on that pony.........that carousel pony. lol


Have a happy day everyone. wink



joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#1026402 - Yesterday at 07:28 PM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
Space Quest Fan Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 10853
Loc: Columbus,Ohio
Have a great Monday everyone. smile
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#1026405 - Yesterday at 08:12 PM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Online   happy
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 67427
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Happy Monday Joe, SpaceQ and all. wave

PT and work today. We had huge hail storm yesterday. Sadly the storm caused fatalities and multiple injuries at a carnival near me. sad

Have a great day!

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#1026425 - Today at 04:16 AM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
MsMercury Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/08/06
Posts: 11760
Loc: Scotland
Hello Boomers!

Joe, hope the dizziness goes away soon! lol!

Have a great day Space!

Aww Ana, how sad. sad Prayers for all affected.

Hubby's taking the car in for service this morning and I'm going along for the ride! Maybe have some retail therapy as well!

To all here and all who stop by later, have a great day guys!

Mary hearts wave
_________________________
"It's not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts." puppy

I'm not getting old....just 'Marvelously Mature'! grin

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#1026428 - Today at 04:47 AM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 18714
Loc: Marlborough USA
wave Good Morning Joe, SpaceQ, Ana and Mary. Joe hang in there. SpaceQ enjoy your day. Ana how sad. Glad you're okay. Mary so nice you are getting out and about! Coffee and tea are waiting for everyone. A Happy Day wished for all! wave
_________________________
Gerry

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#1026437 - Today at 06:52 AM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: Kaki's Sister]
Space Quest Fan Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 10853
Loc: Columbus,Ohio
It has been pouring for hours here. eek
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#1026439 - Today at 07:03 AM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8502
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. To all here and all who stop by later, may your Monday be a Good one. Ana, prayers for those people affected by the storm. Danish, Bacon Sandwiches, and Cinnamon Buns in the NC. summer
_________________________
Connie

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#1026448 - Today at 09:55 AM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: connie]
Darlene Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 9759
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Hope your Monday Monkey Madness is mahvelous!

Ana, heard about this on our news. Prayers going up for all involved. hearts

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

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#1026452 - Today at 10:14 AM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Online   happy
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 67427
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
I woke up to a tree on my roof. sad Crazy night of storms.

Have a great day everyone, I have to get moving.

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#1026457 - Today at 10:51 AM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 43735
Loc: Alabama
Magnificent Monday ya'll

It's hot hot hot and humid humid humid. Makes me very thankful for AC.

Son and the boys got home at 11 last night. I thought mom was coming at 10 this morning to get them, but apparently not.

Not sure what's up for the day wave

Ana, that is awful. I didn't hear any news yesterday. Glad you all are safe. Big tree?

Mary, have fun.
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#1026458 - Today at 11:04 AM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Online   happy
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 67427
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
L4L, soot can show you on my FB page. It was a lovely full tall tree. sad Half is still up, I hope they can save it.
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#1026471 - Today at 01:25 PM Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 14120
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Joe thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely Monday!!!

Space hope the rain stops soon. We need some. Have a lovely Monday!

Ana how awful about the carnival AND the tree on your roof this morning. The storms just roll on by here, teasing us. Pray your tree may be saved!! Have a lovely Monday!

Mary have a fun time on the ride! Have a lovely Monday!

Gerry thanks for the tea water and have a lovely Monday!

Connie thanks for the goodies and have a lovely Monday!

Darlene may work be smooth and you have a lovely Monday!

L4l glad that son and the boys made it home safe! We had a low of 50F this morning! Up to 68F now! Have a lovely Monday and I hope the boys mom shows up for them soon!

wave
Nan

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#1026481 - 24 minutes 20 seconds ago Re: Monday Monkey Madness [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Online   content
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 15513
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Afternoon Boomers

Wishing everyone a wonderful re4st of the day!

Ana scared eek
_________________________
Gail

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