I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering. ~Steven WrightIt was the first time the blonde was eating Thanksgiving dinner without her family. Trying to re-enact the tradition, she prepared a dinner for herself alone. The next day, her mother called to see how everything went.
"Oh, mother, I made myself a lovely dinner, but I had so much trouble trying to eat the turkey!" said the daughter.
"Did it not taste good?" her mother asked.
"I don't know," the blonde said. "It wouldn't sit still!"
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One day an old lady and an old man were sitting on their porch when the old lady says "Hey pa, why don't you run down to the restaurant and get us some ice cream."
Pa said, "Ok I will go right now."
Ma told him that she had better write it down for him, because he always forgets.
He said no he would be fine, so off he went to the restaurant.
When he got back he handed her a hamburger and she said "Dang it pa, I knew you would forget, I told you to get mustard on mine!"
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An Antartian goes into a souvenir shop and asks the man at the counter if he has any alligator skin shoes.
The man said, "Yes, right over there on the shelf."
He walks over to the shelf and then back to the counter where the shop owner was sitting and says, "The shoes cost too much."
The shop owner says, "Well, go and see if you can find some cheaper."
The Antartian leaves the store.
The shop owner, on his way home, notices a dead alligator by the swamp. He pulls over, walks to the swamp and notices the Antartian standing in the middle of the swamp. The man asks him what he is doing in the swamp; about that time the shop owner sees a giant alligator coming up behind the Antartian.
The alligator and the man go under the water. The Antartian comes up and drags the alligator to the shore. He looks at the alligator's feet and says, "This one doesn't have any shoes either."
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Happy Saturday everyone. Joe is rained out and can't get on to start your day so you are stuck with me.
At least he got his wish for lots of rain!
Have a happy one!
JoeAna