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Joe's Sundiner #1043068
11/29/15 12:44 AM
11/29/15 12:44 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline OP
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline OP
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Whatever you are, be a good one. Abraham Lincoln



A man in Amsterdam feels the need to confess, so he goes to his priest.

"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. During world war II, I hid a refugee in my attic."

"Well," answers the priest, "that's not a sin."'

"But I made him agree to pay me 20 guilders for every week he stayed."

"I admit that wasn't good, but you did it for a good cause."

"Oh, thank you, Father. That eases my mind. I have one more question."

"What is that, my son?"

"Do I have to tell him the war is over?"

*****************

The Pope arrives in heaven, where St. Peter awaites him. St. Peter asks who he is.

The Pope: "I am the pope."

St. Peter: "Who? There's no such name in my book."

The Pope: "I'm the representative of God on Earth."

St.Peter: "Does God have a representative? He didn't tell me ..."

The Pope: "But I am the leader of the Catholic Church ..."

St. Peter: "The Catholic church ... Never heard of it ... Wait, I'll check with the boss."

St. Peter walks away through Heaven's Gate to talk with God.

St. Peter: "There's a dude standing outside who claims he's your representative on earth."

God: "I don't have a representative on earth, not that I know of ... Wait, I'll ask Jesus." (yells for Jesus)

Jesus: "Yes father, what's up?"

God and St. Peter explain the situation.

Jesus: "Wait, I'll go outside and have a little chat with that fellow."

Ten minutes pass and Jesus reenters the room laughing out loud. After a few minutes St. Peter asks Jesus why he's laughing.

Jesus: "Remember that fishing club I've started 2000 years ago? It still exists!"

*****************

A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers told her students that she wanted each of them to have learned one fact about Jesus by the next Sunday. The following week she asked each child in turn what he or she had learned.

Susie said, "He was born in a manger."

Bobby said, "He threw the money changers out of the temple."

Little Johnny said, "He has a red pickup truck but he doesn't know how to drive it."

Curious, the teacher asked, "And where did you learn that, Johnny?"

"From my Daddy," said Johnny. "Yesterday we were driving down the highway, and this red pickup truck pulled out in front of us and Daddy yelled at him, 'Jesus Christ! Why don't you learn how to drive?'"

**************

A man charged with assault and battery insisted at his trial that he had just pushed his victim "a little bit". When he was pressured by the prosecutor to illustrate just how hard, the defendant approached the lawyer, slapped him in the face, grabbed him firmly by the lapels and flung him over the table.

He then faced judge and jury and calmly declared, "I would say it was about one-tenth that hard."

*************

It was a sunny Saturday morning, and Jim was beginning his pre-shot routine, visualizing his upcoming shot when a voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker: "Would the gentleman on the Ladies tee please back up to the men's tee, please!"

Jim was still deep in his routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption. Again the announcement: "Would the man on the women's tee kindly back up the men's tee!"

Jim had had enough. He shouted: "Would the announcer in the clubhouse kindly shut up and let me play my second shot!"

**************

Joe still has no internet so you are stuck with me once again. hearts Any complaints take it up with him when he comes back. lol

Have a wonderful day everyone!

JoeAna wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043073
11/29/15 05:11 AM
11/29/15 05:11 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Ana and everyone. You sound like Joe Ana! grin I'll put the coffee and tea on.
Wishing you all a tranquil Sunday. fall


Gerry
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043082
11/29/15 07:42 AM
11/29/15 07:42 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Thanks for filling in Ana. FSU won, one son happy one not so happy. Four sons four different Florida teams. It's a trip on game days. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Sunday. Breakfast out and a bit of shopping today. Danish, Eggs, Bacon, Sausage, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, and Toast in the NC. turkey


Connie
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: connie] #1043084
11/29/15 08:31 AM
11/29/15 08:31 AM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good morning Boomers. wave

Thanks for opening the diner Ana. smile


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043097
11/29/15 11:11 AM
11/29/15 11:11 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline OP
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline OP
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Poor Joe is going through GB withdrawal. He said its a monsoon this morning again and he still has no internet. He says hi!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043109
11/29/15 12:41 PM
11/29/15 12:41 PM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer
auntiegram  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
Aw poor Joe!! Hope the rain goes away soon for ya!

Ana thank you for opening the diner again today!! Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day! Are you free for a walk Friday?????

Gerry thank you for the coffee and have a lovely day!

Connie must be a hoot!!! lol Thanks for the danish and have a lovely day!

Space enjoy your Sunday and have a lovely day!

wave
Nan

Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043110
11/29/15 12:50 PM
11/29/15 12:50 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Good freezing cold morning to all! We are finally getting 'weather' here in San Diego. We had a little rain, a little wind, and now a little cold, and in the mountains 1/2 hour away we are getting a little snow. It's a major holiday for everyone when it snows here. People skip work, kids skip school. Happily there was even enough on this first little bit to make snowmen and snow angels and boogie board down hills (the runs were mostly mud, but who cares?). Lovely weather just in time for the Holidays.

Thanks for filling in for Joe, Ana. Santa will surely put an extra goodie in your stocking.

Poor Joe! Stay dry and hopefully your weather will ease up so you can get that GB 'fix' and be back soon.

Nothing happening around here. I'd write something in Sorta's Neighborhood, but it's been incredibly boring. Still waiting for the 'family' of the old guy to come out here and do something...anything with the house! Most of us in the neighborhood are now getting so angry we are thinking about taking the 'estate' to small claims for allowing this situation to go on so long for no good reason. I'm trying to hold them off. Don't think suing is the answer, but then again, if this isn't resolved by the New Year, I'm probably going to get on that train too. It's been since November of 2013 (actually 6 months before that) that all this started. You would think that someone, anyone could have figured this out by now. No for sale signs, still 3 men 'guarding' the house 24/7 even though the police are doing a fine job of 'extra patrol' and stopping by to spotlight it every night and look at it in the daytime. Nothing happens. 3 guys still there doing their 'thing'. No more obvious drug activity now and that's a biggie. Nice not to have all those people going in and out and parking in front of my house doing drugs in the open. Nobody seems scared of being caught. OH and the gal in the 'apartments' on the other side of me, who was constantly fighting with her boyfriend (physical stuff and yelling) and then started up her OWN drug sales, seems to be GONE. I think the police patrolling and following her to her apartment (I told on her too...uhhuh) maybe got the manager over there to kick her out or she just left. Haven't seen her for 3 or more weeks. Nice.

So off I go today to see if I can find something interesting to watch. If not, I'll just work on redoing, my wooden walkway to my shed. It's rotted out on the support rails and I have to take the entire thing apart and put it back together with new 2x4's so it will last another 15 or so years. Keeps me from having to walk in the dirt, or in mud when it rains to get back to my yard tool shed. I dismantled one section of fence down back (the empty lot barrier) yesterday and it wasn't all that bad. I have to be careful of black widow spiders and such, but I will survive. Hammer, saw, nails, and I'm good to go.


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043115
11/29/15 01:28 PM
11/29/15 01:28 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline OP
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline OP
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Nan, are you traveling through again? yay I'd love to walk with you. Starved Rock or local?


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043122
11/29/15 02:14 PM
11/29/15 02:14 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Super Sunday and May the Force Be With Ya'll puppy

Warm day in Al. Windows open. Hubby in back yard building up the top of the neighbor's fence to keep the other neighbor's dogs from doing a triple fence jump. They jump to the yard behind theirs, into the yard next to ours and then into ours. So frustrating that the neighbor is not the one doing this, but better hubby should do it than their dog kills my dog in my back yard.

Son is talking about taking boys to the park. I'm doing "stuff" and thinking about getting the 4-legged ones out for a walk. We shall see wave


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043123
11/29/15 02:40 PM
11/29/15 02:40 PM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer
auntiegram  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
Oh Ana I would LOVE Starved Rock but won't have that much time. Probably like last year. We are heading to Mooseheart for the Tree Lighting and Christmas Program. Leaving here on Thursday so Friday would be the day!!

Sorta lol that much snow here don't make much of a difference since we are use to it. Have a lovely day!

L4l that is not nice that those people let their dogs jump their fence let alone two others. eek Have a lovely day!

wave
Nan

Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: auntiegram] #1043128
11/29/15 02:55 PM
11/29/15 02:55 PM
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
Darlene Offline
Adept Boomer
Darlene  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet JoeAna! Thanks for the openers and, once again, opening the Diner! Hope your Joe's Sundiner goes easy peasy for you!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Another easy peasy day planned today! We have had a lovely, lovely holiday weekend!

Alrighty, off to see what's afoot!


Woohoo and booyah! smile Have an easy peasy day!
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043136
11/29/15 03:29 PM
11/29/15 03:29 PM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Hi all. smile wave


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043146
11/29/15 04:03 PM
11/29/15 04:03 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline OP
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline OP
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Nan, I will make time for a walk with you. We can go in the woods across the street and hopefully the wildlife will cooperate. Look forwatd to seeing you!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043150
11/29/15 05:11 PM
11/29/15 05:11 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Ahhh, just back from a walk with the doggies. It's HOT out there, so could only get asthma to cooperate for 1 lap. Windows open, fans running, thinking longingly of A.C. wave


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043168
11/29/15 08:33 PM
11/29/15 08:33 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
Hey everyone laugh

I am enjoying a nice hot cup of tea and wishing everyone a quiet Sunday evening

Thanks for keeping the Diner open Ana yes

Joe, keep smiling and luck on getting your internet back

wave


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: soot] #1043185
11/29/15 11:26 PM
11/29/15 11:26 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good night Boomers. sleep


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043186
11/29/15 11:27 PM
11/29/15 11:27 PM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Hi all. Watching the Pats game. So far so good. Bit chilly out there. Glad I'm home. Thanks Ana for opening for poor Joe today. I'm getting ready to find my pillow. Hope you all have a good night. Connie I'll look for my fav breakfast tomorrow morning if I could. smile

Midgie hearts

Last edited by Midge; 11/29/15 11:34 PM.

Just do it.
Re: Joe's Sundiner [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1043218
11/30/15 09:54 AM
11/30/15 09:54 AM
Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 69,973
MaG Offline
Sonic Boomer
MaG  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 69,973
Hi Midge,

Everything okay now? Sorry about the Pats game.

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