When a woman tries on clothing from her closet that feels tight, she will assume she has gained weight. When a man tries on clothing from his closet that feels tight, he will assume the clothing has shrunk.

Rita Rudner

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Funny Headlines

Stolen Prosthetic Arm Discovered in a Secondhand Shop

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Marshall County Sheriff’s Candidate Disputes Report of Own Death

WAFF (Huntsville, Alabama)

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Headlines around America

• County to Pay $250,000 to Advertise Lack of Funds (Register-Guard, Eugene, Oregon)

• 4-H Training Scheduled for Shooting Instructors (Pine City Pioneer, Minnesota)

• Study Shows Frequent Sex Enhances Pregnancy Chances (Winchester Star, Virginia)

• Police: DUI Charge for Woman Celebrating End of Earlier DUI 
Suspension (Chicago Tribune)

• Federal Agents Raid Gun Shop, Find Weapons (Tulsa World, Oklahoma)

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Here’s the news: A Rhode Island man was arrested for passing a counterfeit $100 bill. What gave him away? Lincoln’s face: It’s supposed to be on the $5 bill.
Source: Sun Chronicle (Attleboro, Massachusetts)

Here’s the laugh: A counterfeiter drives to a small town, enters a store, and hands the rube behind the counter an $18 bill. “Mind making change?” he asks.

“Sure,” says the clerk. “Ya want two nines or three sixes?”

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Headline from the Times Herald-Record (Newburgh, New York): West Point Cadets Train for Life in Iraq with Weekend in N.J.

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Woman with Arms Held

—Source: Times of India

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Wisconsin Woman Takes Husband to Police for “Talking Stupidly”
—Source: La Crosse (Wisconsin) Tribune

``````````````````````

Warehouse Worker Packing Stress Balls Punched His Boss in Face
—Source: Mirror

`````````````````````````

Vladimir Putin Hires Boyz II Men to Boost the Russian Birth Rate
—Source: Daily Mail

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Torrington Police Search for Jesus
—Source: Hartford Courant

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Suspected Beer Thief Leaves Liquid Trail
—Source: Charleston Daily Mail

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Stylish but Illegal Monkey Found Roaming Toronto IKEA
—Source: The Globe and Mail

```````````````````````````

Study: Rich More Likely to Take Candy from Babies
Source: Washington Post

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Statistics Show Teen Pregnancy Drops Off Significantly After Age 25
—Source: New York Post

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Spay/Neuter Clinic for Low-Income Residents
—Source: (Lewiston, Maine) Sun Journal

````````````````````````````

Sun Is Too Round, Say Scientists
—Source: The Independent

````````````````````````

Self-Proclaimed Invisible Man No-Show at Court Hearing
—Source: The Daily Herald (Provo, Utah)

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Red Cross in Search of Donors with Low Blood Supply
—Source: Sandusky Register

```````````````````````````

Puerto Rican Teen Named Mistress of the Universe
—Source: Associated Press

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Police Charge One-Armed Man with Unarmed Robbery
—Source: Masslive.com

`````````````````````````````

Police Arrest Naked Man with Concealed Weapon
—Source: MSNBC.com; contributed by Linda Fabbri, Corbin, KY

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Good morning everyboomie.


Another day, another 24 hours.


I think if I work fast today I can cut that 24 hours in half.


I'm in a hurry to get to my next work day.......don't ask me why.


I don't know why.


What I do know is that time flies when you're having fun, so I'm going to have more fun than I can possibly imagine today.


Not really.


I think I have developed an allergy to fun.


The last time I had some I was exhausted and drained afterward and I broke out in smiles.


Have a fun day everyone.



joe

Have a "fun" day Joe! Just think how well you'll sleep when you have one!

I'm heading to the city to bike ride with Peter today. Still chilly out but the sun will be shining.

Have a happy day all!

Ana

Good luck with your fun allergy, Joe.

Have fun bike riding with Peter today, Ana.

It's late Tuesday night here, and it looks like I have another day off tomorrow. It's nice, but it's also a bit annoying we still don't have the hours we've been promised. Well, it's another day of gaming and singing with the kitties, I suppose.

Have a great Wednesday, everyone.

Good Morning Joe, Ana, venus and everyone. Have a great day Joe. Ana enjoy your bike ride with Peter. Venus have fun with the kitties, Coffee and tea are ready. Wishing you all a Happy Day!

Good morning everyone. Have a Wonderful Hump Day. Danish, BB Pancakes, and Bacon Sandwiches in the NC.

Good morning Boomers

Joe, enjoy the day. Have fun!

Ana, enjoy your bike ride with Peter.

Venus, have fun on your day off.

Gerry, coffee please and thank you.

Connie, Danish sounds good this morning. Have a great day!

Happy Hump Day to All!

Good Morning everybody!!! May you all have a wonderfully lovely day!!

Abbi week here!!!

Darlene still sending HUGS and prayers for your friend!

Midge sending HUGS and prayers your way also!!


Nan

Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Fun is a very good thing to have! Hope your Hump Day is full of fun!

Nan, thank you for your hugs and continued prayers for my dear friend. She is in surgery this morning....

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Have a wonderful day!

Happy Hump Day ya'll

Busy day here. Climbing Mt. St. Laundry, and running out to do errands, and coming back to make granola bars, and If I have energy, dinner

Today is MIL's day off surgery. Last stent is set for tomorrow.

Joe, fun is mandated. Go for it!

Ana, have a great ride!

Venus, sorry your hours are not as promised. I know how hard that is when budgeting. Hope it improves soon.

Thanks for the tea, Gerry. I brewed mine too long, so I'm heading for the corner and yours.

Connie thanks for the Bacon Sandwiches. Just what I need to get me through the day.

Gail, have a great day.

Nan, have fun with Abbi. How old is she now?

Darlene, prayers for the surgery. And hugs to you...waiting is awful!

Good afternoon boomers. Hope you all have a wonderful Wednesday

The fun never ends around here. Last night 1t 10pm (after a very calm day/week) a HUGE motor home cruised by slowly. That means that they are looking for an address or a place to park. It crept up the side street, back down the side street, went past my house (whew) and then came BACK! It parked itself right across the street, as close to the bumper of the guy's car over there as it could get. Out gets a man, who walks to the corner (only about 30 feet) and next thing I know is HE is in the MIDDLE of the intersection shouting into his cell phone while traffic goes around him. This is a busy street. I'm amazed nobody hit him. So he's yelling about being one or two blocks from 3rd and that the other person should come HERE. Guess they wanted him to go to them. 10 minutes later, an old (1970's) huge Cadillac De Ville pulls up in front of MY house and a lady gets out. She shouts across the street to the guy something about his seatbelt hanging out the window. This goes on for a few takes and then she yells that he is only ONE block away from the next cross street. I'm assuming that's where she was when he wanted her to come to him. Oh well.

So I wait and wait and wait. They are in the motor home now, lights here and there in the front, maybe from an Ipad or phone, but no major lighting. Maybe he has no lights? Maybe that's why he's parked here?

I go out to inspect and take pictures this morning. Yes, both vehicles are still here. The car has one plate from Arizona, Don't know about the motor home yet, but it's so HUGE. Probably the biggest they make. Then I realize I KNOW this motor home. It's one of those from the street where the transients (campers? travelers?) park all the time. It's got dolphins on the side. Very hard to miss. So I'm guessing the police might have scooted all those happy campers off the street today. We have a new law requiring people parking motor homes/campers/commercial trucks on the street to only be there less than a day and definitely not overnight. They now sell 'permits' to these people at 3 bucks a day to park on a city street, then it can be renewed twice for a total of 9 days and then they have to move on. AND it can only be parked on the street IF it's within one block of their legal residence.

Guess how well this law is working? NOT. Anyway, today I get to watch and see when they leave. The motorhome is not blocking my street view so that's nice, but if he attempts to move it in front of my house (bigger space don't know why he didn't) then I will be out there telling him to move it. I have no authority to do that, but bluffing sometimes works. I just don't see why they can't park in their own property or in a park made for that purpose. These aren't vacationers, they live in the motorhomes and cars too. Junk all piled up inside all the vehicles. I would feel bad for them but I've seen the people from these vehicles shopping at Wally Mart, going to the Welfare office just down the street, etc. They probably get more benefits than I do. They all have FREE cell phones (not kidding, the providers actually set up shop right next to the major camping areas. Guess it's good for business. And they all get free food in the park from several agencies. I wouldn't want to live that way, but it works for them.

So now I sit, I watch, I wait. So far nothing is moving but I'm hopeful that by noon, both of these vehicles will move on to a better place. Goodbye to them.

Okay, back from errands. Kitchen cleaned (again), granola bars in the oven, yogurt getting ready to move to stage 2, last load of laundry in, and Finally, I'm going to sit and sip. I made myself a pot of tea this morning but let the bags steep too long....yeeesh! Thought I could drink it so as not to be wasteful but so not!

Edit: Bed time. Sweet dreams all