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Tuesday's #1067909
05/23/16 11:16 PM
05/23/16 11:16 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
JONAH HILL

I want to meet the man who saw a turtle and said, “People will LOVE the ninja version of that.

`````````````````````````

Up on the screen at our local multiplex, the star whispered to his female costar, "I want you to be my mistress."

"What’s a mistress?" my eight-year-old granddaughter yelled out.

Then the man gave the woman a passionate kiss.

"Never mind," my granddaughter said.

```````````````````````````

I love making clothes for my five-year-old granddaughter. And she, in turn, always seems happy to accept them. The other day, I asked if she would like me to make her a skirt.

"Yes," she said. "But this time, could you make it look like it came from a store?"

`````````````````````````````````

The 6 a.m. regulars at the dog run are, not surprisingly, a pet-oriented group. Recently John started discussing his trip. "The flight was awful! We were delayed for a few hours, and when we finally boarded, the baby behind me didn’t stop crying for the whole flight."

Another dog run regular turned to him in surprise: "What did the owner do?"

````````````````````````````

At my ten-year-old’s request, I loaded my Rolling Stones tunes onto his iPod.

"I had no idea you liked the Stones," I said.

"Sure. I like all that old-fashioned music," he said.

"What do you mean, ‘old-fashioned music’?"

"You know," he said defensively. "Music from the 1900s."

`````````````````````````````

"Daddy," said my 11-year-old daughter, "I think I want to join the Army."

"Baby," I answered, "I think the Air Force would be a better option for you."

"But I don’t want to be a pilot."

"You don’t have to be a pilot," I told her. "There are other jobs in the Air Force."

Her answer: "I don’t want to be a flight attendant either."

``````````````````````````
Every morning, I do a mad dash to drop off my son Tyler at day care so I can get to work on time. My impatience hit home one morning when he piped up from the back of the car, "Our car is really fast and everyone else’s is slow because they’re all idiots, right, Mom?"

`````````````````````````

My mother taught for 11 years at a day-care center. One winter afternoon she was trying to show a young boy how to zip up his coat. "The secret," Mom said, "is to get this piece of the zipper to fit in the other side before you try to zip it up."

After struggling with the zipper for several minutes, the boy sighed and said, "Why does it have to be a secret?"

`````````````````````````````

Luke, our venturesome 14-month-old son, was at my mother-in-law’s house. He was playing with her car keys when the phone rang. After hanging up, my mother-in-law realized that Luke had put the keys down someplace, but she couldn’t find them anywhere. Thinking quickly, she gave him another set of keys.

As she pretended not to look, Luke toddled around the corner and into her bedroom. Then she watched as he carefully placed the second set of keys under her bed—right next to the original car keys.

````````````````````````

I had finished my Christmas shopping early and had wrapped all the presents. Having two curious children, I had to find a suitable hiding place. I chose an ideal spot—the furnace room. I stacked the presents and covered them with a blanket, positive they’d remain undiscovered.

When I went to get the gifts to put them under the tree, I lifted the blanket and there, stacked neatly on top of my gifts, were presents addressed to "Mom and Dad, From the Kids."

`````````````````````````````

When my daughter was little, we took a vacation to Florida. Seated on the airplane near the wing, I pointed out to Rhonda that we were above the ocean. "Can you see the water?" I asked her.

"No," she said, peering out the window at the wing, "but I can see the diving board."

`````````````````````````

My sister had been ill, so I called to see how she was doing. My ten-year-old niece answered the phone. "Hello," she whispered.

"Hi, honey. How’s your mother?" I asked.

"She’s sleeping," she answered, again in a whisper.

"Did she go to the doctor?"

"Yes. She got some medicine," my niece said softly.

"Well, don’t wake her up. Just tell her I called. What are you doing, by the way?"

Again in a soft whisper, she answered, "Practicing my trumpet."

`````````````````````````````

When my neighbor’s granddaughter introduced me to her young son, Brian, I said to him, "My grandchildren call me Mimi. Why don’t you call me that too?"

"I don’t think so," he retorted, and ran off after his mother.

Later I was asked to baby-sit for Brian, and we hit it off wonderfully. As he snuggled up to me, he said, "I don’t care what your grandchildren say. I love you, Meanie."

````````````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


TGIT, and welcome to the weekend.......or, my next two days off. joy


Yesterday we had a bunch of rain. Buckets of rain. Today could bring more. happydance


Either way I've got nothing to do. The creek will be too high, and too muddy today and tomorrow. smirk


My sister called yesterday. She found a baby hawk on the road with a broken wing. I guess I'll call her and see if she was able to find anyone to care for it. yes


I hope she did. I'm really not very good at regurgitating my lunch in order to feed my young. razz


Have a happy day everyone. thumbsup



joe


Last edited by gymcandy1; 05/23/16 11:17 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1067926
05/24/16 02:43 AM
05/24/16 02:43 AM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Good morning,have all a happy day. wavegirl


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1067932
05/24/16 05:46 AM
05/24/16 05:46 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
spring Good Morning Joe, Haroula and all. Coffee and tea are ready. Enjoy your day! spring


Gerry
Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1067943
05/24/16 06:24 AM
05/24/16 06:24 AM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Good morning all. I'm getting ready for work in a sec. I hope you all have a wonderful day today. See you after my first shift.

Midgie hearts wavegirl


Just do it.
Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1067947
05/24/16 07:16 AM
05/24/16 07:16 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Great Tuesday. Danish, Muffins, and BB Pancakes in the NC. spring


Connie
Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1067949
05/24/16 07:24 AM
05/24/16 07:24 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, enjoy your day off.

Midgie, hope work goes easy for you this morning.

Haroula, happy day wishes.

Gerry, thanks for the coffee.

Connie, Danish sounds great this morning.

Wishing everyone a great day! Raining here. Looks like a good gaming day.


Gail
Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1067958
05/24/16 09:27 AM
05/24/16 09:27 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Good morning everyone!

Joe, I hope your sister can find someone to help rehabilitate the hawk. How sweet of her to bring it home. hearts

Haroula, have a great day too!

Gerry, how's things?

Midgie, I hope work is easier this morning.

Connie, is Robert feeling any better?

Gail, enjoy your gaming!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1067989
05/24/16 12:41 PM
05/24/16 12:41 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Terrific Tuesday Ya'll puppy

I've been up for a long time, but was busy busy busy in the kitchen! Will be heading out to the park in a bit with the boys, and wanted to be sure to get lots of prep work done for dinner tonight. I'm making fried chicken and potato salad so wanted to get as much done as possible so I don't get too tired to actually cook it. lol

Joe, I can see you with a hawk but you'll have to watch the pups. Hawk might see lunch.

Haroula wave

Gerry, thanks for the refreshments.

Midgy, have fun. How are you feeling?

Connie, thanks. Busy day?

Gail, have fun!

Ana, what were you guys doing with the frogs you were catching?


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1068017
05/24/16 02:42 PM
05/24/16 02:42 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Putting them right back where they belong L4L! I'm too much of a nature lover to be cruel and keep them. Kind of like catch and release fishing. laugh Tell soot to look on my FB page and show you.


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Tuesday's [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1068029
05/24/16 03:43 PM
05/24/16 03:43 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good afternoon Boomers. wave


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1068056
05/24/16 08:53 PM
05/24/16 08:53 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Will do, Ana wave

Afternoon Space wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Tuesday's [Re: looney4labs] #1068059
05/24/16 09:24 PM
05/24/16 09:24 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Hi looney. wave2


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Tuesday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1068063
05/24/16 09:36 PM
05/24/16 09:36 PM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Time to wrap myself in my throw and find my pillow. Night all. Sweet dreams. I'll find my BB pancakes in the morning.

Midgie hearts


Just do it.
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