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TGIF #1071759
06/23/16 11:13 PM
06/23/16 11:13 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
I never took a day off in my twenties. Not one.

BILL GATES

```````````````````````

A few months ago, Hamas 
“arrested” a dolphin for being an 
Israeli spy. Readers of Reason 
magazine came up with titles for
 the film this action might inspire:

• Orcapussy
• Free Schmuelly
• Goldflipper
• The Porpoise-Driven Life
• Dolphinfidel

``````````````````````````````

Spotted in the classifieds: “For sale: cemetery plot, $200, so 
I don’t have to spend all eternity 
beside my ex!”

```````````````````````

The Best of The Onion Magazine Covers

• “I Thought He Was Going to Kill Me”: One Woman’s Harrowing Misunderstanding of How Haircuts Work

• The 100 Worst Senators

• The World’s 10 Most Powerful Women: We Make Them Discuss Fashion and Lindsay Lohan

````````````````````

“Now hiring,” read the classified ad. “Cemetery superintendent. The ideal candidate must be able to supervise in a fast-paced environment.”

```````````````````````

Just because the items in these classified ads are free doesn’t mean they’re worth it:

• Free: Piano with matching bench seat, very good condition, all keys work probably

Source: Gettysburg Area Merchandiser

• Free: 5 kitchen drawers, all matching naughty pine fronts

Source: Topeka Capital-Journal

• Free Vain Screening

Source: Boston Globe

• Free rent in exchange for elderly woman

Source: 11points.com

```````````````````````````

Bad Typos in Real Newspapers

We all make mistakes. Some 
are just more public than others, 
like these real newspaper typos:

“Here the bridal couple stood, 
facing the floral setting, and exchanged cows.” Modesto News-Herald (California)

“It took many rabbits many years to write the Talmud.” Holland Evening Sentinel (Michigan)

“Mrs. ____ fell down stairs at her home this morning, breaking her myhodudududududududosy, and suffered painful injuries.” Ohio paper

“A headline in an item in the 
Feb. 15th edition incorrectly stated ‘Stolen Groceries.’ It should have read: ‘Homicide.’” Enquirer-Bulletin

`````````````````````````

Heading Off Criticism

Think the comments on Internet posts are tough? See what happened when the Washington Post asked its readers to write intentionally angry letters to actual headlines:

Headline: 20,000 Pound Pavement to Help Homeless

Response: “Are you people idiots? What the homeless need are homes, not ten tons of additional pavement!”

Headline: Maryland Agrees to 
Tobacco Settlement

Response: “Well, that’s all we 
need—an entire settlement of people devoted to their cancer sticks. What’s next, a drunk-driving commune?”

Headline: C.C. United Se Une 
Hoy a Campana Solidaria Pro 
Centroamerica

Response: “I was disgusted with 
the sloppy spelling for [this] article. There were so many typos, I couldn’t understand a word.”

``````````````````````````````

File These Headlines Under: We Don’t Even Want to Know.

•Firefighters Use Jaws of Life to Free High School Girl from Locker

•FDA Approves Third Silicone-Gel Breast Implant

•Missing Woman Unwittingly Joins Search Party Looking for Herself

•Woman’s “Stomach Bug” Actually Baby

`````````````````````````````

A headline in my local newspaper: “Appleton Airport May Soon Be Known as Appleton Airport.”

```````````````````````````

Department of (Ridiculous) Corrections

Journalists and editors on deadline make the occasional error. Some are funnier than others:
• NBC reported that American students rank internationally at: “26th math, 21th science, 17th reading.”
• Britain’s Sky News showed the 
importance of punctuation: “Top 
stories: World leaders at Mandela tribute, Obama–Castro handshake and same-sex marriage date set.”
• A retraction from Wired: “A previous version of this story incorrectly quoted Dropbox cofounder Drew Houston saying ‘anyone with nipples’ instead of ‘anyone with a pulse.’”

`````````````````````````````````````

Stolen Prosthetic Arm Discovered in a Secondhand Shop

`````````````````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


Well there you go. Another diner served up only a few hours old and lukewarm. thumbsup


It's fittingly from someone who is way more than a few hours old, but just as lukewarm. wave2


That's ok though because I heat up fast real when I go outside in this heat, but then that's NOT ok, because I'd rather be lukewarm than so hot I'm about to blow my stack. blush


I like my stack the way it is. razz


It's snow white, which serves to temper my firey.........temper. headscratch


If I'm making any sense, then this your lucky day.


My senility seems to come and go lately, much like my senility. wink


Have a happy day everyone.


I'M OFF! penguin


I'm also off to bed.


joe



Last edited by gymcandy1; 06/23/16 11:15 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071760
06/23/16 11:16 PM
06/23/16 11:16 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Yay for making it to your day off Joe! joy What will you be doing today other than keeping cool?

Have a happy day all!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071762
06/23/16 11:43 PM
06/23/16 11:43 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Have a terrific Friday Joe, Ana and all who follow. wave

It's late Thursday night here. I fell asleep with the light on again. woozy It's another work day tomorrow, followed by singing practice afterward.

And now, I have to turn off my computer, as yet another thunderstorm has hit. Have a great Friday, everyone. summer


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071770
06/24/16 04:49 AM
06/24/16 04:49 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
summer Good Morning Joe, Ana. venus, and all. Coffee and tea are ready. Wishing you all a wonderful Friday! summer


Gerry
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071777
06/24/16 07:30 AM
06/24/16 07:30 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
connie Online content
Graduate Boomer
connie  Online Content
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Super TGIF. Danish, BB Pancakes, and Bacon Sandwiches in the NC. summer


Connie
Re: TGIF [Re: connie] #1071781
06/24/16 08:22 AM
06/24/16 08:22 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 29,026
Unionville
manxman Offline
Sonic Boomer
manxman  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 29,026
Unionville
Good morning boomers. Have a fantastic Friday everyone wave


Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071788
06/24/16 09:32 AM
06/24/16 09:32 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers summer

Joe, try to keep cool today! Happy day off.

Ana, have a good one.

Gerry, enjoy the day!

Venus have an easy work day.

Connie, wishing you a happy day.

Manxman, enjoy whatever the day brings.

Wishing everyone a super Friday! Off to buy more mulch for my front bushes. Almost finished with all the yard work. hamster


Gail
Re: TGIF [Re: GBC] #1071796
06/24/16 11:20 AM
06/24/16 11:20 AM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
Good morning Ana, Venus, Gerry, Connie, Manxman, Gail, and everyone. wave2

I took my babies to the park this morning, and then went to Walmart for dry goods, wet goods, frozen goods, every kind of goods. grin

After I got home I put the groceries, and started a load of laundry. yes

Now I have some cleaning to do, and that's about it for this fine day. woot

I hope everyone is having a super day so far. happydance


joe wave


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071799
06/24/16 11:46 AM
06/24/16 11:46 AM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer
auntiegram  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
Well Joe, I see you got all your running around things done while it was still a little cool! Enjoy your day off and have a lovely day!

Ana have a lovely day!

venus may work be fun and you have a lovely day!

Gerry thanks for the tea! Have a lovely day!

Connie thanks for the Danish and have a lovely day!

Manxman have a lovely day!

Gail sounds like you are making the yard beautiful!! Have a lovely day!

Abbi day! happydance

wave
Nan

Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071800
06/24/16 11:53 AM
06/24/16 11:53 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Fantastic Friday ya'll puppy

Hot hot hot...Keoki does not seem to be "right" today sad He is eating, so not panicking yet. Will be on hyper watch status today though.

Off to feed the monkeys and make smoothies for son before work.

wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071801
06/24/16 12:19 PM
06/24/16 12:19 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Good news on our local fire. All evacuations are lifted for now and the fire is about 35% contained. Still being cautious for possible change in the direction, but people are able to go home after 6 days and see what remains. At least 5 homes burned, loads of animals displaced or missing, but things are looking up. Many people refused to evacuate when they were told, and they took care of livestock for themselves and neighbor's houses and watched for possible looters. Dangerous, but kudos to them for stepping up. One downside being reported is a 'local' market is being accused of 'gouging' prices during the fire because it was the only place the evacuees could go. Time will tell.


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071809
06/24/16 01:24 PM
06/24/16 01:24 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Sorta, so glad everyone can come back and that some were able to stay and look after animals safely. Always sad when folks are price gouging.


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: TGIF [Re: looney4labs] #1071824
06/24/16 02:40 PM
06/24/16 02:40 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Enjoy your weekend everyone. happydance


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1071838
06/24/16 05:11 PM
06/24/16 05:11 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Space, you made it home early. Must be something in the air wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: TGIF [Re: looney4labs] #1071872
06/24/16 11:25 PM
06/24/16 11:25 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
I did looney. Have a great weekend.

Good night Boomers. sleep


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
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