-1.There was a young lady from Niger,
Who smiled as she rode on a tiger.
They came back from the ride
With the lady inside,
And the s---- on the face of the tiger.
-2.There was a young lady named Perkins,
Who just simply doted on gherkins.
In spite of advice,
She ate so much spice,
That she p-----d her internal workins'.
-3.An elderly bride of Port Jervis
Was quite understandable nervis.
Since her apple-cheeked groom,
With three wives in the tomb,
Kept insuring her during the s------.
-4.I bought a new Hoover today,
Plugged it in in the usual way,
Switched it on - what a din;
It sucked everything in,
Now I'm homeless with no place to s---.
-5.There once was an old man of Esser,
Whose knowledge grew lesser and lesser,
It at last grew so small
He knew nothing at all
And now he's a college p--------.
6.There was a young lady from Hyde,
Who ate a green apple and died.
While her lover lamented,
The apple fermented,
And made cider i--i-e her inside.
-7.An artistic young man called Bo,
To an art class decided to go.
The teacher said, "Not right
Your page is all white!"
Bo said, "It is a polar bear in s---."
-8.I'm papering walls in the loo
And quite frankly I haven't a clue;
For the pattern's all wrong
(Or the paper's too long)
And I'm stuck to the toilet with g---.
-9.There once was a girl named Irene,
who lived on distilled kerosene.
But she started absorbin'
A new hydrocarbon,
And since then has never b------!
-10.At 16 I sighed as I hoped
For a bike like a Harley. I groped
In my pocket for cash
And bought something less flash;
Then I sat on my moped and m----.