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#1075309 - 07/23/16 09:56 PM Sip and Surf Sunday
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 31181
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.
HENRY FORD

```````````````````````````


You’ve probably seen some of these classic dumb, stupid and funny warning labels and product instructions before. Some are painfully obvious, some don’t quite master the English language, and others are unintended double meanings… Most are pretty darn funny. So, in case you missed any, here is a collection of the stupidest and funniest warning labels, most verified as authentic.

Funny, Dumb and Stupid Warning Labels


Do not use while sleeping.
Sears hair dryer

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside.
Bag of Fritos

Use like regular soap.
Dial soap

Serving suggestion: Defrost.
Swann frozen dinner

Fits one head.
Shower cap box

Do not turn upside down.
Bottom of Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert box

Product will be hot after heating.
Marks & Spencer bread pudding

Do not iron clothes on body.
Rowenta iron

Do not drive car or operate machinery.
Boot’s children’s cough medicine

Warning: May cause drowsiness.
Nytol

Warning: Keep out of children.
Korean kitchen knife

For indoor or outdoor use only.
Chinese Christmas lights

Not to be used for the other use.
Japanese food processor

Warning: Contains nuts.
Sainsbury’s peanuts

Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.
American Airlines peanut packet

Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
Swedish chainsaw

``````````````````````````````


Humorous, silly, stupid and weird classified ads from newspapers and magazines


Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else.

Stock up and save. Limit: one.

We build bodies that last a lifetime.

For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.

Man, honest. Will take anything.

Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References required.

Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.

Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!

Christmans tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.

Modular Sofas. Only $299. For rest or fore play.

Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.

Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.

3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred.

Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.

Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.

Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you’ll never go anywhere again.

Holcross pullets. Starting to lay Betty Clayton, Granite 5-6204.

Illiterate? Write today for free help.

Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.

Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.

Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.

Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.

And now, the Superstore–unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.

We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.

``````````````````````````````

Here are some funny newspaper headlines:

Grandmother of eight makes hole in one

Deaf mute gets new hearing in killing

Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers

House passes gas tax onto senate

Stiff opposition expected to casketless funeral plan

Two convicts evade noose, jury hung

William Kelly was fed secretary

Milk drinkers are turning to powder

Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted

Quarter of a million Chinese live on water

Farmer bill dies in house

`````````````````````````````

Welcome to the sweetest little Sip and Surf Sunday Diner everyboomie. welcome


Sugar....Ah Honey Honey....You are my candy girl, and you got me wanting you. grin


Is that sweet enough for you? hamster


Personally I'm trying real hard to cut down on sugar. razz


It's a struggle. blush


A..sweet struggle. snicker


It's making me a sourpuss though. taz


Hopefully though I'll be a healthy-er sourpuss. wink


Have a happy day everyone.


joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#1075319 - 07/23/16 11:08 PM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
Space Quest Fan Online   content
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 13459
Loc: Upper Arlington, Ohio
Enjoy your Sunday Boomers. smile
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#1075327 - 07/23/16 11:58 PM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 70667
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Good Morning Joe, SpaceQ and all. Bad storms here and power outages surrounding us but thankfully I am still with power.

Have a happy day all!!

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#1075333 - 07/24/16 12:51 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 6672
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Have a terrific Sunday Joe, Space Quest, Ana and all who follow. wave

It's late Saturday night for me, and I'm off to sleep. More practicing and gaming await me tomorrow. grin

Have a great Sunday, everyone. summer
_________________________
Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?

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#1075345 - 07/24/16 04:21 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 9778
Loc: Greece
Good morning everyone. wavegirl
Have all a relaxing Sunday. happydance summer
_________________________
I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".


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#1075348 - 07/24/16 05:19 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
True Blue Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 20856
Loc: Marlborough USA
summer Good morning Joe, Ana, Space, venus, Haroula and all. Another hot day in the upper 90s today. It's the last day of the Tour de France. They ride thru the streets of Paris to end the race. It looks like Chris Froome will win! Coffee, tea along with iced tea are ready. Enjoy the day! summer
_________________________
Gerry

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#1075351 - 07/24/16 06:41 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 9126
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Great Sunday. Breakfast out, getting the oil changed, and some shopping. Danish, Eggs, Bacon, Sausage, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, and Toast in the NC. summer
_________________________
Connie

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#1075355 - 07/24/16 08:31 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: connie]
Space Quest Fan Online   content
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 13459
Loc: Upper Arlington, Ohio
Stay cool Boomers. It is going to be another 90 degree day here today. eek
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#1075358 - 07/24/16 09:03 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 16720
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers lab

Wishing everyone a super good and peaceful day! Off to church. Very hot day here today. summer
_________________________
Gail

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#1075367 - 07/24/16 10:22 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: GBC]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 31181
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
Good morning Boomer buddies. wave2

It's 'lets be extremely lazy today' day. wink

It's 83 degrees, but it's very still. There's not much breeze, and it feels like 93 degrees. eek

I had 3 cups of coffee, and then I took the girls for a walk around the block. I really didn't want to drive up to the park. razz

It's a bit of a challenge when you have both dogs on a leash, but if I don't give them too much leash they don't run circles around me and tie me up. lab

I'll spend most of my day playing Paradise, which I loaded up last night, and was very happy to see that it works. bravo

Have a super Sunday everyone.

joe


Edited by gymcandy1 (07/24/16 10:25 AM)
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#1075370 - 07/24/16 10:34 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 14450
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Joe stay cool and chill today! Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day!

Space enjoy the second half of the weekend and stay cool. Have a lovely day!

Ana glad you were safe during the storms. We had 90's last week and yesterday started out at 75 and before I knew it was 65! lol duh A storm headed in and the wind came off the lake and we didn't see a drop. It disappeared before it got to the ground. Today has started at 61!!! Have a lovely day!

venus happy singing and gaming! Have a lovely day!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Gerry thanks for the ice tea and have a lovely day!

Connie enjoy breakfast and shopping! Have a lovely day!

Gail enjoy church and have a lovley day!

wave
Nan

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#1075374 - 07/24/16 10:49 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: auntiegram]
Space Quest Fan Online   content
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 13459
Loc: Upper Arlington, Ohio
Have a great day Nan. smile
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#1075375 - 07/24/16 10:56 AM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 70667
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Nan, I thought we were going to get blown away or swept away in water on the road trying to get home from a night out with friends. It was insane! Glad you guys are ok!

Off to starved rock for a hike. I need some nature time.

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#1075386 - 07/24/16 12:02 PM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: BrownEyedTigre]
Darlene Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 10147
Loc: Southern California
wave2 Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Sounds like your retirement is off to a wonderful beginning! Happy Sip and Surf Sunday!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Should be slightly cooler today. Got up to 111 yesterday! eek

Hubby's sister is in town so we will have a family day today! hearts

Alrighty, off to see what's afoot!
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

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#1075394 - 07/24/16 01:31 PM Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Online   content
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 45517
Loc: Alabama
Whoops, thought I'd said Hi, but must not have.....Have a great day ya'll wave
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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