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#1076140 - 07/29/16 10:25 PM Surf and Turf Saturday
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 31175
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
Don’t find fault. Find remedy. Anyone can complain.

HENRY FORD
```````````````````

“Does It Only Come In Black?”

My five-year-old son is crazy about cars, so I took him to his 
first car show. He loved seeing all 
the different models and brands 
and gushed over the big engines, 
the colors, and even the wheels. But the car he was most impressed with was a hearse. “Mom!” he shouted. “Look at all this storage!”

``````````````````````````````````

Tooth or Consequences

After cleaning my five-year-old patient’s teeth, I accompanied him to the reception area, only to see him struggle with the oak door.

“It’s heavy, isn’t it?” I asked.

“Yes,” he said. “Is that so children can’t escape?”

````````````````````````````

New Generation

I was visiting a friend who could not find her cordless phone. After several minutes of searching, her young daughter said, “You know what they should invent? A phone that stays connected to its base so it never gets lost.”

````````````````````````

The Cop and the Superhero

A concerned police officer approaches a boy who is crying in front of a newsstand. “What’s wrong?” the cop asks.

“Superman isn’t out yet!” says the boy.

“I’ll handle it,” the cop assures him. “Hey, Superman!” he shouts. “Come on out! We won’t hurt you!”

```````````````````````

Good Genes?

The topic for my third-grade class was genetics. Smiling broadly, I pointed to my dimples and asked, “What trait do you think I passed on to my children?”
One student called out, “Wrinkles!”

```````````````````````````

In the Band

Sam’s eighth birthday, my brother took him to a football game. During halftime, a Marine band played, and Sam studied them intently.

“Why the interest in the band?” his father asked.

“I’m checking to see if Ben and Matt from our synagogue are in it. They’re Marines.”

“But they’re in Afghanistan.”

“If I were in a marching band, I’d say I was in Afghanistan too.”

```````````````````````

Mature Fun

As I was treating my daughter and her family to the buffet at a casino, all the bells and whistles for a winning slot machine began to go off. My seven-year-old grandson was awed.

“Wow!” yelled Casey. “This is like Chuck E. Cheese for old people.”

````````````````````````

The Test

When my eight-year-old asked how I knew I was pregnant, I told her I had taken a pregnancy test. “Oh,” she said. “What questions were on the test?”

``````````````````````````````

Sign of the Times

At a baby shower, everyone was asked to complete nursery rhymes. My 11-year-old daughter Taylor contributed this: "Jack Sprat could eat no fat.
His wife could eat no carbs."

````````````````````````````

It's About Time

A few weeks? after the death of my father-in-law, I found my seven-year-old son crying in bed. His grandmother had died the previous year, and he was taking it all very hard. "You know, Kyle," I said, "when we die, we’ll get to see Grandma and Grandpa again in heaven."

With tears spilling down his face, Kyle cried, "That’s easy for you to say. You don’t have that long!"

````````````````````````

War Veteran

When I took my school-age daughters to a lunch with veterans, I told them to ask questions. One of the men said he’d fought in the Korean War, and the girls were so impressed that the eldest wanted to know more: "Did you fight for the North or the South?"

```````````````````````````

What's My Name?

My five-year-old nephew has always happily answered to BJ. That ended when he came home from his first day of school in a foul mood. It seems his teacher took roll, and he never heard his name.

"Why didn’t anyone tell me my name was William!?" he complained.

``````````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


Welcome to the weekend! It's party time. yay


I hear Midgie has a hot tub, and I need to soak. shocked


My arm is still sore from the Tetanus shot I got Wednesday at the VA. razz


Or was that a distemper shot? taz


A back yard party with grilled hamburgers sounds awesome. woot


Anything I can eat sounds awesome right now. For the first time in my life I'm counting calories. blech


My body mass index is a little bit high on the 'mass' part. blush


Make my bacon cheeseburger a lite.


Anybody got a calculator?


joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#1076144 - 07/29/16 10:47 PM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Online   happy
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 70637
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Joe, you are so thin I can't imagine you are counting calories! What's on the agenda for the weekend?

Have a happy day all! Supposed to be another rainy day so not sure what the day will bring.

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#1076146 - 07/29/16 10:55 PM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: BrownEyedTigre]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 31175
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
Ana I was at 194.7lbs. The last time I was there I was 188lbs. Six months before that I was 177lbs. At that rate, 'thin man' is not what they'll be calling me in another year's time. blush

Since I retired, eating has become one of my primary activities. razz

joe



Edited by gymcandy1 (07/29/16 10:57 PM)
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#1076153 - 07/29/16 11:44 PM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Online   happy
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 70637
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
lol Joe, eating is fun though, isn't it? I'm sure your pups will be happy to help you burn off the calories by going for more walks. puppy
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#1076162 - 07/30/16 04:25 AM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
True Blue Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 20850
Loc: Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana and everyone. Coffee and tea are ready. Enjoy your Saturday! summer wave2
_________________________
Gerry

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#1076169 - 07/30/16 05:49 AM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 9778
Loc: Greece
Good morning,have all a happy day. wavegirl summer
_________________________
I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".


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#1076172 - 07/30/16 06:38 AM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 9121
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Wonderful Saturday. Danish, BB Pancakes, and Bacon Sandwiches in the NC. summer
_________________________
Connie

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#1076184 - 07/30/16 09:04 AM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 16714
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers yay

Joe, enjoy whatever plans you make for the day!

Ana, happy day wishes to you!

Gerry, coffee please and thank you.

Connie, it's the weekend so I'm ready for Danish.

Haroula, have a happy day!

Wishing everyone a super duper weekend! summer
_________________________
Gail

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#1076185 - 07/30/16 09:08 AM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: connie]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 31175
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
Good morning Ana, Gerry, Haroula, Connie, and everyone. wave2

I'm trying to be lazy this morning, and have an extra cup of you know what. wink

The last couple of mornings here have been cooler. It's 75 now, but it feels like 84. yes

Not sure if I'll go to the park yet. I may just walk the dogs around the block. lab

Other than that........... duh

I've gotta go. My cup is half empty.........I mean half full. grin

Have a great day everyone. thumbsup

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#1076193 - 07/30/16 10:17 AM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 6669
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Have fun with your dogs today, Joe, whatever you decide to do. lab

Hope your day is fun in spite of the rain, Ana.

Have a great Saturday, Gerry.

Enjoy your day, Haroula.

Thanks for the extra breakfast, Connie. grin

Have a fantastic Saturday, Gail.

I have a voice lesson today. rah Hopefully, it won't be cancelled this time. grin

Have a terrific Saturday, everyone. summer
_________________________
Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?

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#1076199 - 07/30/16 10:49 AM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: venus]
Space Quest Fan Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 13429
Loc: Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good morning Boomers.
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#1076207 - 07/30/16 11:11 AM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 45502
Loc: Alabama
Super Saturday ya'll puppy

I think vacuuming is calling for the day. Hubby will do errands, son will head to work, boys will hang with us.

Joe, have fun with those calories lol

Ana, rain all day? Daughter has had hail for the last 2 days, so I shouldn't complain about the heat.

Gerry, wave

Haroula, hope you have a great day!

Connie, busy day planned?

Gail, what's on the agenda today?

Enjoy your lesson, Venus.

Morning, Space wavegirl
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#1076221 - 07/30/16 01:35 PM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 04/30/00
Posts: 15354
Loc: Massachusetts
Hi everyone. Joe I did have a hot tub years ago when we still had the house. It's been quite awhile though. Wow, you dug up so many happy memories. Thanks.

I had the morning off today. I love it when I don't have to work the morning shift. In the weather department, it's cooler than it has been. No nineties today.

Be back.....

Midgie hearts wavegirl
_________________________
Just do it.

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#1076229 - 07/30/16 04:00 PM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 45502
Loc: Alabama
Midgy, did you get out to enjoy the cooler weather?
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#1076235 - 07/30/16 06:09 PM Re: Surf and Turf Saturday [Re: looney4labs]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 31175
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
Hey gang I hope you're all having a great day so far. wave2

Walking the dogs, watching movies, walking 3 miles on my treadmill, and playing NIBIRU, has filled my day with joy. joy2

I'm desperately in need of a shower now. blush

Midgie are those BB pancakes you have every day real or virtual? lol

We did have lots of fun in your pool and hot tub. wink

I'm fighting an earache now, and trying to keep it from getting worse. smirk

Have fun everyone. thumbsup


joe


Edited by gymcandy1 (07/30/16 06:10 PM)
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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