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TGIF #1077826
08/11/16 10:36 PM
08/11/16 10:36 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.

ERMA BOMBECK

``````````````````

How To Translate Work Emails

I have a question. = I have 18 questions.

I’ll look into it. = I’ve already forgotten about it.

I tried my best. = I did the bare minimum.

Happy to discuss further. = Don’t ask me about this again.

No worries. = You really messed up this time.

Take care. = This is the last you’ll ever hear from me.

Cheers! = I have no respect for you or myself!

`````````````````````

As a Speech therapist, I was working with a preschooler on 
body-part identification and the 
k sound. To that end, I had him 
use Play-Doh to make a sculpture 
of me.

“Is that my neck?” I asked, trying to get him to repeat the word.

“No, that’s your chin,” he said.

He added more Play-Doh. “Is that my neck?” I asked.

“No, that’s your other chin.”

```````````````````

While I was out to lunch, my coworker answered my phone and told the caller that I would be back 
in 20 minutes. The woman asked, 
“Is that 20 minutes Central Standard Time?”

``````````````````

It’s amazing how a person can compliment and insult you at the same time. Recently, when I greeted my coworker, she said, “You look so gorgeous, I didn’t recognize you.”

``````````````````````

Design Client From Hell: “Remove That Circle”
Client: Please remove the unnecessary circle at the end of the sentence.

Me: You mean … the period?

Client: I don’t care what you designers call it; it is unsightly. Delete it.

```````````````````

I’ve been working on my PhD 
in engineering for the past five years, but my kids don’t necessarily see that as work.
As we were driving past Walmart one day, my son spotted a Now Hiring sign and suggested that I could get 
a job there.

Hoping to make a point, I asked, “Do you think they’re looking for an engineer?”

“Oh, sure,” he said. “They’ll hire anybody.”

````````````````````````

An insurance agent called 
our medical office. One of our 
doctors had filled out a medically necessary leave-of-absence form 
for a patient, but, the agent said, the 
patient had altered it. The giveaway? 
The return-to-work date had been changed to February 30.

``````````````````

I supervised an employee who had a negative view of everything 
I did. If I took a vacation day, I was “never there.” If I praised someone’s work, it was “too little, too late.”

He eventually took another job 
but was fired six months later. Shortly thereafter, he contacted 
me, hoping to return to his old job.

“Have you learned anything from this experience?” I asked.

“Yes, I should have stayed here,” 
he admitted. “You’re too indecisive to have ever fired me.”

`````````````````

I guess this is what happens after you’ve worked at the same place for a while. I was eating at a fast-food restaurant when an employee began his shift by walking into the kitchen area and calling out, “Honey, I’m home!”

`````````````````

Before google, there were librarians. Here are some queries posed to the poor, suffering staff of public libraries:

• A woman wanted “inspirational material on grass and lawns.”

• “Who built the English Channel?”

• “Is there a full moon every night in Acapulco?”

• “Music suitable for a doll wedding to take place between a Shirley 
Temple doll and a teddy bear.”

• “Can the New York Public Library recommend a good forger?”

`````````````````

Unintelligent Design

Client to designer: “It doesn’t really look purple. It looks more like a mixture of red and blue.”

```````````````````````

The Paradox of Grown-Ups

I spend three minutes every 
day choosing a TV channel 
to leave on for my dog. Then 
I go to work, and people take me seriously as an adult.

`````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


IT'S FRIDAY!!!! joy2


Don't ask me why that excites me so coz I don't know. razz


I'm really just excited right this minute because it's time to go to bed. yay


I didn't get a long enough nap today. snicker


I spent way too much time playing one of the FEAR games that I installed yesterday. It's been years since I've played it. happydance


I hope it's a super Friday for everyone. thumbsup


joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077827
08/11/16 10:42 PM
08/11/16 10:42 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
Wow Joe, I can't believe it's Friday already...I have lost track of time lol

Have a super TGIF Day everybody!!

wave2


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077832
08/11/16 11:00 PM
08/11/16 11:00 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, I love FEAR. Those ninja dudes in the ceilings scared me all the time! Happy Friday!

soot, time flies when you are having fun!

Have a great day everyone!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077852
08/12/16 05:03 AM
08/12/16 05:03 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, soot, Ana and everyone. Coffee and tea are ready! It's going to be oppressive here today in the 90s and feel like over 100 with a high dew point and humidity! Wishing you all a cool day! summer wavegirl


Gerry
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077855
08/12/16 05:09 AM
08/12/16 05:09 AM
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 12,378
Scotland
MsMercury Offline
Adept Boomer
MsMercury  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 12,378
Scotland
Hello Boomers, wishing a great day for you all!

Weather miserable, cool and very windy with heavy rain forecast for this afternoon so not much happening today, just chilling with hubby!

Mary wave2 hearts


"It's not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts." puppy

I'm not getting old....just 'Marvelously Mature'! grin
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077859
08/12/16 06:42 AM
08/12/16 06:42 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Great TGIF. Going out for dinner and karaoke tonight with friends. Danish, BB Pancakes, and Bacon Sandwiches in the NC. summer


Connie
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077860
08/12/16 06:55 AM
08/12/16 06:55 AM
Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 690
NYC, NY USA
LadyLinda Offline
Settled Boomer
LadyLinda  Offline
Settled Boomer

Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 690
NYC, NY USA
woozy

I posted this problem on yesterday's thread and I also see it on today's thread.

crazy

He eventually took another job 
but was fired six months later. Shortly thereafter, he contacted 
me, hoping to return to his old job.

The 'L SEP' box appears before the words, but and me in the above sentence.
I determined that this is a Google Chrome problem as I logged on via MS Edge and do not see the box.
I have this problem on another site too with Chrome.

smashpc

Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077863
08/12/16 07:13 AM
08/12/16 07:13 AM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Good morning all. I hope you all have a great Friday. Busy day for me.

Midgie hearts wavegirl


Just do it.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077866
08/12/16 08:11 AM
08/12/16 08:11 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Wishing everyone a wonderful day. We're off to the ocean. penguin


Gail
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077869
08/12/16 08:35 AM
08/12/16 08:35 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 29,026
Unionville
manxman Offline
Sonic Boomer
manxman  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 29,026
Unionville
Hope everyone has a fantastic Friday wave


Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077882
08/12/16 09:55 AM
08/12/16 09:55 AM
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
niteowl07 Offline
BAAG Specialist
niteowl07  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
Morning everyone ! dr.appt today finally ,and halfway through my project , so things are looking good !

hope it's a wonderful one for all of you , and thanks for the coffee ,Gerri !

see you later wave

Re: TGIF [Re: LadyLinda] #1077884
08/12/16 10:02 AM
08/12/16 10:02 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Originally Posted By: LadyLinda
woozy

I posted this problem on yesterday's thread and I also see it on today's thread.

crazy

He eventually took another job 
but was fired six months later. Shortly thereafter, he contacted 
me, hoping to return to his old job.

The 'L SEP' box appears before the words, but and me in the above sentence.
I determined that this is a Google Chrome problem as I logged on via MS Edge and do not see the box.
I have this problem on another site too with Chrome.

smashpc


I use Google Chrome and do not have this problem. Hope you can fix it.


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077886
08/12/16 10:21 AM
08/12/16 10:21 AM
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
niteowl07 Offline
BAAG Specialist
niteowl07  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
perhaps post to glitches ? and see if they know what's up ?

Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077900
08/12/16 02:14 PM
08/12/16 02:14 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Fantastic Friday ya'll puppy

Slept in waaaaaaaaaaaay too late this morning. Boys will be here soon. I will get the vacuuming finished before they get here, but that's about all lol wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: TGIF [Re: looney4labs] #1077911
08/12/16 03:23 PM
08/12/16 03:23 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good afternoon Boomers. wave


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077930
08/12/16 06:41 PM
08/12/16 06:41 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Afternoon, Space. How was work?


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: TGIF [Re: looney4labs] #1077948
08/12/16 07:54 PM
08/12/16 07:54 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
It was a good day looney. thanks


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077958
08/12/16 08:47 PM
08/12/16 08:47 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
That's good to hear. Dinner done. Per watching Olympics, Cully playing Wii. I'm going to finish watching this episode of the Great British Baking Show wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077960
08/12/16 09:35 PM
08/12/16 09:35 PM
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
niteowl07 Offline
BAAG Specialist
niteowl07  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
glad you had a decent day ,spacequest !

i've not watched that show , l4l ,although i've seen it advertised on netflix.

did well at the dr's - i was sicker than i thought , so i got a bunch of shots to kick things off till my medicines get here. i'm feeling some better already , so it was a good day here ,too happydance

and - we had a nice day weather - wise - mid 80's with a breeze !with temps in the low 60's for overnight , i'll take it no questions asked lol hopefully i'll be able to get some sleep.

how was everyone else's day ?

midge - how did you do at your appts ? still good news for you ? don't work any harder than you do , ok?

wave

Last edited by niteowl07; 08/12/16 09:35 PM.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1077961
08/12/16 09:42 PM
08/12/16 09:42 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
So glad you got meds Niteowl. Hope you are soon feeling a-ok!

I'm off to bed. Sweet dreams sleep


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
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