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TGIF #1078700
08/18/16 10:17 PM
08/18/16 10:17 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did–in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car.
BOB MONKHOUSE

``````````````````

Today, my 808 area code phone number has yet again been mistaken for a 1-800 number. I’ve been getting phone calls at three in the morning from people on the East Coast trying to return their shoes. Even worse, they end up wanting to speak to my supervisor because I “don’t sound professional enough.”

From fmylife.com

``````````````````

“So what’s that brush for?” the new hire asked.

“It’s used to clean toilet bowls in the lobby,” said the first manager.

“Actually, it’s for scrubbing deep fryers,” said the second manager.

“Well, I’ve been cleaning toilets with it,” said the first manager.

“Um, I’m putting in for a new brush,” said the second manager.

`````````````````

I’m pretty sure the dinosaurs died out when they stopped gathering food and started having meetings to discuss gathering food.

`````````````````

I bragged to my boss that I didn’t need painkillers after a major surgery. His response: “This time, your evil superpowers came in handy.”

```````````````````

I spent four years in 
college. I didn’t learn 
a thing. It was really 
my own fault. I had 
a double major 
in psychology 
and reverse 
psychology.

B. J. Novak, who says he was 
hired as a writer 
for The Office 
on the strength 
of the joke above.

````````````````````````

Faculty at our university had to file an explanation when they gave a grade of Incomplete. One semester, a professor’s report read “Student #1 contracted mononucleosis. Student #2 contracted pregnancy.”

``````````````````

A customer walked up to my 
bank window and asked me to cash 
a check.

“Of course,” I said. “But I’ll need to see ID.”

She dug though her purse and handed me a snapshot.

“That’s me in the middle,” she said.

``````````````````

One of my insurance customers faxed over the police report from 
an auto accident. Several weeks later, she called asking for information from that report.

“Didn’t you keep the original copy?” I asked.

“No,” she said. “I faxed it to you.”

Sherri Smith, Carrollton, Texas

`````````````````````

Six Dumb Questions Real 
Lawyers Asked In Court
“How many times have you 
committed suicide?”
“Were you alone or by yourself?”
“Was it you or your brother who was killed?”
“Without saying anything, tell the jury what you did next.”
“Was that the same nose you broke as a child?”
“Now, doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, 
he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?”

````````````````````````

Bitter? No!

Not the people who posted this sign at a bookstore that was going out of business: “Sorry, no public restroom. Try amazon.com.”

Source: Consumer Reports

```````````````````

Put It On My Tab

One of the joys of working is 
the opportunity to expense stuff you need. But did employees go too far with these items?
• Lottery tickets
• Pet food
• A tepee
• Hot tub supplies
• A fine for crashing into a tollbooth

````````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


How is everyone doing? yay


Once again the promised and prophesied rain for our area formed in a huge mass South of us, moved in our direction until it was almost upon us, and then magically slid to the East without leaving so much as a drop. razz


It's a government conspiracy of gigantic proportions.......to keep me from finding any arrowheads. blech


I did go to the creek today. It wasn't a complete waste of energy, I lost 2 pounds....of water. shocked


As I was making my way down to the creek, I had this narrative running through my head, "As Joe hacked his way through the dense growth with his machete, the heat and humidity was as torrid as was his love affair with hunting the rustic arrowhead." snicker


It wasn't actually that hot, but it was extremely humid, and I really did lose a couple of pounds of water. shocked


I didn't spend too long down there, and I didn't find any points, but I did find a small rough blade. yes


I WON'T be going back until it cools way down.


Have a happy Friday everybody.


joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078702
08/18/16 10:25 PM
08/18/16 10:25 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
I'm sorry the rain missed you yet again, Joe. I tried to send it to you, but I guess my aim was off. lol

It's Thursday night here, and I'm off to sleep. I have a long work day tomorrow. crazy

Hope everyone has a great Friday. summer


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078706
08/18/16 11:09 PM
08/18/16 11:09 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, if I had a dime every time you said you wouldn't go back until it's cooler, I could buy a pizza. At least a personal size one. lol hearts Just teasing you, my friend! Have a wonderful day!

venus, I'm joining you on the long work day tomorrow! Hope yours goes well.

Have a happy day all!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078718
08/19/16 05:16 AM
08/19/16 05:16 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
summer Good Morning all. Coffee and tea are ready. Happy Day to you all! summer


Gerry
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078724
08/19/16 07:00 AM
08/19/16 07:00 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Wonderful TGIF. Dr. visit went well yesterday. Dinner and karaoke tonight at the VFW. Danish, BB Pancakes, and French Toast in the NC. summer


Connie
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078730
08/19/16 07:58 AM
08/19/16 07:58 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers wave2

Joe, Hope you get some relief from the heat soon.

Ana, wishing you an easy workday today.

Venus, easy workday wishes for you also.

Gerry, have a good day.

Connie, enjoy the VFW tonight.

Wishing everyone a super good Friday! lab


Gail
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078742
08/19/16 10:05 AM
08/19/16 10:05 AM
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
niteowl07 Offline
BAAG Specialist
niteowl07  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
sorry you didn't have much luck hunting , joe. maybe you need a new spot ? how do you know where to look ,anyways ?

morning , ana !

thanks for the coffee , gerri!

ooh - french toast sounds good , connie !

and super good friday back to you , gail ! and to everyone coming along after !

starting off with picking up and light cleaning ,then my sister's b-day , so i'll see you all later wave

Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078750
08/19/16 11:41 AM
08/19/16 11:41 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Fantastic Friday ya'll puppy

Hot hot hot! What else is new?

Boys will be here right after school.

Prayers would be much appreciated. Today, and possibly the next few, will be hard. Son's kitty, Miss Spryte, is very very sick and the vet has said there is nothing they can do. He spent yesterday just cuddling her but has to go to work today and tomorrow as well. Lots of stress and sadness happening here right now.

On a positive note though, MIL is being released from rehab today and hubby will most likely be traveling home this weekend joy


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078752
08/19/16 11:43 AM
08/19/16 11:43 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Prayers and Hugs on the way, L4L. hearts


Connie
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078764
08/19/16 03:06 PM
08/19/16 03:06 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Prayers and lots of hugs. So sorry, L4L. hearts


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: TGIF [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1078770
08/19/16 03:28 PM
08/19/16 03:28 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Prayers heading up looney. hearts


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078771
08/19/16 03:29 PM
08/19/16 03:29 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Any plans for the weekend, SpaceQ?


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078777
08/19/16 04:21 PM
08/19/16 04:21 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Thanks, Guys. Much appreciated. She is sleeping on son's bed at the moment which is a big improvement...she had been sleeping in the kitty litter. sad Vet says it's either bone or blood cancer, but that she is too old to withstand the chemo needed to cure it. They say it's a matter of days. I was surprised she was still with us this morning. He has had her for almost 19 years, so it will be a major hole in his/our lives.

Time for a quick nap before the boys get here. wave


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078779
08/19/16 04:40 PM
08/19/16 04:40 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
So sorry about Miss Spryte. Cuddling and familiar surroundings will be of great comfort to her. I cuddled my first kitty as he passed and we slept together all that night. Was so sad but comforting to know we were together. He seemed to 'know'. Hope your son can be there as much as possible. Prayers for kitty and you and son.


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078798
08/19/16 09:12 PM
08/19/16 09:12 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Thanks Sorta. Son is home on cuddle duty, so I'm heading to bed. Sweet dreams all sleep


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: TGIF [Re: looney4labs] #1078800
08/19/16 09:59 PM
08/19/16 09:59 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good night Boomers. sleep


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078809
08/19/16 11:08 PM
08/19/16 11:08 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Good night, everyone. sleep


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1] #1078814
08/19/16 11:30 PM
08/19/16 11:30 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Sweet dreams...


Don't feed the Trolls
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