We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine.
EDUARDO GALEANO`````````````````
One of my fourth graders asked my teacher’s assistant, "How old are you, Mrs. Glass?"
"You should never ask an adult’s age," I broke in.
"That’s okay," Harriett said smiling. "I’m fifty."
"Wow, you don’t look that old," the boy said. I was breathing a sigh of relief when another child chimed in, "Parts of her do."
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After booking my 90-year-old mother on a flight from Florida to Nevada, I called the airline to go over her needs. The woman representative listened patiently as I requested a wheelchair and an attendant for my mother because of her arthritis and impaired vision. I also asked for a special meal and assistance in changing planes.
My apprehension lightened a bit when the woman assured me everything would be taken care of. I thanked her profusely.
"Why, you’re welcome," she replied. I was about to hang up when she cheerfully asked, "And will your mother be needing a rental car?"
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I was having lunch with my daughter Rachel, who’s three, at our local mall and was feeling particularly macho for a 46-year-old. All morning, women had been smiling at me and giving me the eye.
Getting up to leave the table, I ran my fingers through my hair—and discovered two yellow-ducky barrettes that had been lovingly placed there hours before.
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Visiting his parents’ retirement village in Florida, my middle-aged friend, Tim, went for a swim in the community pool while his elderly father took a walk. Tim struck up a conversation with the only other person in the pool, a five-year-old boy. After a while, Tim’s father returned from his walk and called out, "I’m ready to leave."
Tim then turned to his new friend and announced that he had to leave because his father was calling. Astonished, the wide-eyed little boy cried, "You’re a kid?"
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The insurance agency I work for draws business from a retirement community. Once, when applying for auto insurance for a client, I asked him how many miles he drives in a year. He said he didn’t know.
"Well, do you drive 10,000 miles a year?" I asked, "or 5,000?"
He said the numbers sounded high. "What month is this?" he asked. I told him it was July.
"Maybe this will help," he said. "I filled the car with gas in February."
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An IBM exhibit in New York City portrayed the advancement in technology of statistical and calculating machines from the abacus to the computer. After completing the tour, I stopped at the reception desk to ask a question. There, a distinguished elderly gentleman was keeping track of the number of visitors in the old tried-and-true method of drawing IIII IIII on a sheet of paper.
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To my friend’s astonishment, a police car pulled up to her house and her elderly grand-father got out. The patrolman explained that the old gentleman had been lost in the city park and had asked for help.
"Why, Grandfather," my friend said, "you’ve been going there for 40 years. How could you get lost?"
The old man smiled slyly. "Wasn’t exactly lost," he admitted. "I just got tired of walking."
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An attorney I know once drafted wills for an elderly husband and wife who had been somewhat apprehensive about discussing death. When they arrived to sign the documents, he ushered the couple into his office.
"Now," he said to them, "which one of you wants to go first?"
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When a woman called 911 complaining of difficulty breathing, my husband, Glenn, and his partner—both EMTs—rushed to her home. Glenn placed a sensor on her finger to measure her pulse and blood oxygen. Then he began to gather her information. "What’s your age?" he asked.
"Fifty-eight," answered the patient, eyeing the beeping device on her finger. "What does that do?"
"It’s a lie detector," said Glenn with a straight face. "Now, what did you say your age was?"
"Sixty-seven," answered the woman sheepishly.
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Good morning everyboomie.
Welcome to the weekend!
I'm looking at a pretty busy morning. I'll take the pups to the park, and then run to Walmart and stock up on groceries........again, and then run home and mow the yard, which is something I should have done this evening but I had already taken my shower before I thought about it.
I went out to mow the lawn the day before yesterday, and it started to rain just as soon as I took the cover off my mower, so I didn't mow, and then yesterday we got a fair amount of rain, so I couldn't mow, and now the grass is VERY green, and growing fast.
I'm going to file a huge complaint at Walmart. The food I've been buying there just disappears after I get it home. I keep buying the stuff, and it keeps disappearing in like nothing flat.
It's pretty annoying.
and expensive.
I hope you all have a very happy weekend.
joe
acebook
witter
Good morning Joe, Ana and everyone. Joe it's a never ending process - stocking up and depleting! Ana how lucky you are! Have fun at the fair. Coffee and tea are ready. Wishing you all a Happy Day! 
We have that same grocery problem. If you get it solved, let me know. 
Have fun and enjoy!
