LAURENCE J. PETER
If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?
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More Bad Date Excuses101. My asthma is acting up again
102. That would interfere with my time to wait for the government to take me away.
103. You're ugly, I'm busy, have a nice day
104. Its my goldfish's birthday
105. Uh, I have stuff to do.
106. I have to make an air sandwich
107. I have to hide the bodies.
108. I don't have time to go on a date...with YOU!
109. I have to wash my hair.
110. I have to clean my toilet
111. I need to spend quality time with my weed wacker
112. I need to clean the air in my room
113. My hamster is having a heart transplant and I need to stay for moral support.
114. I caught a rare deadly African disease that's highly contagious.
115. My gerbil is getting married.
116. I have plans to clean the cracks in my floor
117. Sorry, when you came to my door I mistook you for a mormon and took cover.
118. I had to rob your house
119. That's the night I reorganize my rock collection.
120. Pinnochio is on tonight
121. I have to try out for the ice skating team at school.
122. I don't date outside my species
123. Sorry I think I'm gay
124. I have to go...........over..............there.
125. My butt is to big in this dress
126. I have to take out the trash
127. My dog had baby kittens.
128. I can't, I need to take my computer apart and put it back together.
129. I have to go shopping for my mother.
130. I'm sorry, I have to rotate the strings on all of my shoes.
131. No
132. I told my car I would tenderly rub wax into it's body
133. I have to go for my full body wax appointment
134. I can't I was asked to go to another party w/o you
135. I don't date goats!
136. Ally Mcbeal is on
137. I'm reading with my widower
138. I have to brush my teeth.
139. Alf comes on soon
140. I'm sick.
141. I've had a better offer, some bloke is coming round to set fire to my head
142. I'm busy cleaning the blood off my axe
143. My dad said I can't date till I am married
144. I'm shaving my dog.
145. It's against my religion to date people named (insert relevant name)
146. My grandma is on fire.
147. I'm getting married tonight.
148. I'm engaged.
149. I don't want to ruin our friendship.
150. I have family in town.
151. I just washed my hair.
152. It's that time of the month again.
153. My father's grandmother's aunt's mother died.
154. I have to take down the Christmas lights.
155. I have to go to a surprise party for my grandma's birthday.
156. I left my tolerance in another coat.
157. I just got back together with my ex
158. I don't like people.
159. I have to alphabetize my CDs. (Hey, is that supposed to be insulting to me? -- dan)
160. I might see someone who knows me.
161. My brother's sister's mum's son's dad died.
162. I would, but it would be a complete waste of make-up.
163. My pet snake is constipated again.
164. I have a phobia of people named (insert name here).
165. I have to teach my pig to sing.
166. I just got sick (right after you asked me out).
167. My dog is too tired.
168. I never said I'd go out with you, that was my evil twin.
169. I would go out with you but my waiting list is full.
170. There's a four hour TV special on trimming shrubbery.
171. I'm washing the sofa.
172. I have to milk my cow.
173. Everquest.
174. I don't want to miss Martha Stewart's premiere.
175. I have to teach my frog how to croak.
176. I'm too busy watching the paint dry.
177. The "Rocky" marathon is on that night.
178. I promised my mum I'd bathe the hamster.
179. I tripped over an ant and broke my leg.
180. I need to clip my nose hairs.
181. I have to read the labels on all of my food.
182. You are extremely unattractive. Sorry, someone had to tell you.
183. I'm gay.
184. I don't like you.
185. My goat broke a horn.
186. I have to go to the dentist.
187. I have to brush my dog's teeth.
188. I must go in search of my charms which were stolen by an angry leprechaun.
189. I'm going to the moon.
190. My water wings are flat.
191. I have to stay home and give my goldfish a bath.
192. I'm going to be playing with my mental blocks.
193. I have to wax the driveway.
194. I'm not into dating right now.
195. I'm teaching my goldfish how to play the electric guitar.
196. I'm teaching my dog to meow.
197. I have to watch Oprah.
198. I like you, but my friends said I can't go out with you.
199. I like your best friend.
200. I'm complicated to go out with.
201. I just found out we're related.
202. On my list of things to do, seeing you is at the bottom.
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Good morning everyboomie.
Ok lets see, what day is this? I think I've lost track.
Did I ever mention that the first thing they taught us in high school art class was how to draw a blank?
I was a natural at it of course, and I keep getting better with age.
I imagine at this rate, I'll be a master at it by the time I reach 50 years old.
I do seem to remember that it's time to take my dementia pill.
Without those I wouldn't even remember that I live in Montana.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
acebook
witter
Joe! btw, did you feel the earthquake the other day? 
I'm feeling as gloomy as the rain falling right now.
no long lines here. Dinner and karaoke at Panda tonight. Danish, BB Pancakes, and Bacon Sandwiches in the NC. 
looney. How was your day?