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Sip and Surf Sunday #1091585
12/03/16 09:26 PM
12/03/16 09:26 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
We pick politicians by how they look on TV and Miss America on where she stands on the issues. Isn’t that a little backwards?

JAY LENO

```````````````


On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"

To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"

```````````````````

Juan was driving down a country lane in his pickup when suddenly a chicken darted into the road in front of him. He slammed on his brakes, but realized that the chicken was speeding off down the road at about 30 miles an hour. Intrigued, he tried to follow the bird with his truck, but he couldn't catch up to the accelerating chicken. Seeing it turn into a small farm, Juan followed it. To his astonishment, he realized that the chicken had three legs. Looking around the small farm, he noticed that ALL of the
chickens had three legs.

The farmer came out of his house, and Juan said, "Three-legged chickens? That's astonishing!"

The farmer replied, "Yep. I bred 'em that way because I love drumsticks."

Juan was curious. "How does a three-legged chicken taste?"

The farmer smiled. "Well I haven't been able to catch one yet so I'm not sure."

````````````````

The farmer's son was returning from the market with the crate of chicken's his father had entrusted to him, when all of a sudden the box fell and broke open. Chickens scurried off in different directions, but the determined boy walked all over the neighborhood scooping up the wayward birds and returning them to the repaired crate. Hoping he had found them all, the boy reluctantly returned home, expecting the worst.

"Pa, the chickens got loose," the boy confessed sadly, "but I managed to find all twelve of them."

"Well, you did real good, son," the farmer beamed. "You had seven when you left here."

````````````````

These quotes were taken from actual Federal (US) employee performance evaluations...

"Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig."

"His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity"

"I would not allow this employee to breed"

"This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won't be"

"Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap"

"When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet"

"He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle"

"This young lady has delusions of adequacy"

"He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them"

"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot"

"This employee should go far, and the sooner the better"

"Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together"

"A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus"

"He certainly takes a long time to make his pointless"

"He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier"

"I would like to go hunting with him sometime"

"He's been working with glue too much"

"He would argue with a signpost"

"He has knack for making strangers immediately"

"He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room"

"When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell"

"If you see 2 people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one"

"A photographic memory but with the cap over the lens"

"A prime candidate for natural deselection"

"Donated his brain to science before he was done using it"

"Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming"

"Has 2 brains, one is lost, the other is out looking for it"

"If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week"

"If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change"

"If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean"

"It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000 other sperm"

"One neuron short of a synapse"

"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled"

"Takes him 12 hours to watch 60 Minutes"

"The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead"

``````````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. santa


Like a bad penny, I just keep turning up every day, and spewing a mouth full of minutia. woozy12


Today was largely a gaming day for me. bravo12


The wind and light rain never let up all day. It was a good day to lay on the couch with a blanket and sleep and watch movies too. yay12


The dogs wanted to take the truck and go to the park without me, but I'm reluctant to let them drive my new truck on wet roads. shame12


They're not on my insurance policy as drivers. wink12


I didn't even walk out to the mailbox today. I figured if there's anything in there, it can wait. grinch


I'm sure Spring is just around the corner. happydance12


Have a happy day everyone.


joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091597
12/03/16 10:59 PM
12/03/16 10:59 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Have a great Sunday everyone. wink


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091618
12/04/16 02:42 AM
12/04/16 02:42 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Online content
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Online Content
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, rain to flood the creeks and fall to get rid of the grasses is just what you want, isn't it? Sometimes a rainy day is welcomed if you don't "have" to do anything. Hope you enjoyed your games!

SpaceQ, happy Sunday!

Have a great day all! Not sure what will be on the agenda today.

Ana :wave:


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091622
12/04/16 04:18 AM
12/04/16 04:18 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Have a great Sunday Joe, Space Quest, Ana and all who follow. wave12

I fell asleep with the light on again, and I hope I'm not coming down with something. frown12 All this stress and extra work plus the change of weather seem to be getting to me. On a positive note, I had a really good dinner with Thorsgoats and a co-worker last night. thumbsup12

Today, I'm just going to relax and game while I have the chance. I have to fight off whatever I may be coming down with and hope it doesn't turn into anything worse. yes

And now I'm going back to sleep with the light and the computer off this time. lol12

Have a terrific Sunday, everyone. tree

Last edited by venus; 12/04/16 04:19 AM.

Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091629
12/04/16 05:10 AM
12/04/16 05:10 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
tree Good Morning Joe, Space, Ana, venus and everyone. Sounds like it's going to be a quiet day for you Joe, Space, Ana and venus. Relax and enjoy! Coffee and tea are ready.
Wishing everyone a peaceful Sunday! tree


Gerry
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091635
12/04/16 07:56 AM
12/04/16 07:56 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
tree Good morning everyone, have a Wonderful Sunday. Breakfast out and a BJ's trip today. Danish, Eggs, Bacon, Sausage, Ham, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Biscuits and Gravy, and Toast in the NC. santadance


Connie
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091637
12/04/16 07:59 AM
12/04/16 07:59 AM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Good morning all.I hope you all have a great Sunday. tree

Midgie hearts wavegirl


Just do it.
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091639
12/04/16 08:03 AM
12/04/16 08:03 AM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Have a relaxing day everyone. tree


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091648
12/04/16 11:57 AM
12/04/16 11:57 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Super Sunday ya'll puppy

I had a sleepwalking little boy in my bed last night. Thought it was Seagan cuddled up to my back, but when I petted "her," "she" had a hand with fingers. Turned out to be Cullen sleepwalking.

We are heading to A Christmas Carol this afternoon, and then we will most likely take the boys somewhere they like to eat.

I hope you all have a great day!


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091653
12/04/16 12:59 PM
12/04/16 12:59 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Did I mention I still had a 'house mouse'? I'm putting down some sunflower seeds on a paper towel to see where it's hiding. Each time I look away or walk to another room and get busy, I come back and it's eaten the seeds. Darn. Smart little guy. Last night I heard a 'swish' and looked over just in time to see the paper towel scooting across the floor. I still don't know which area it is hiding in. I'm trying to keep the door open so it can run back outside but so far no luck and it's COLD so I'm freezing. Hopefully today I can devote a lot of time to watching it run and eat. I'm going to Wally Mart to get one of those 'no kill' mouse traps in hopes of getting it and putting it outside. Geez. The fun never ends.


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: looney4labs] #1091656
12/04/16 01:16 PM
12/04/16 01:16 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
Good morning everyone. santa

MaG I love the snow flakes. I kinda wish I could see some falling here. Not a bunch though. happydance12

I can't believe it's still morning I've been up so long. It's cloudy and cold here, but warmer than yesterday, and no rain today, AND we should see a little sunshine here in just a little while. I'm sure I'll take the dogs to the park soon. They're climbing the walls. puppy

I'll be watching football today, but my Cowboys don't play again till next Sunday night. frown12

That's a real bummer since I will NOT be re-watching that last "UGLY" game. Glad they won, but they are lucky to have won it. They can't play that poorly again. blech

There are plenty of 'games of interest' to watch today. wink12

I also have to either walk an hour on my hamster wheel, or do the 7 minute workout. hamster

Ana you are so right. The rain is not nearly enough though, to clean out the creek, and the cold is not enough to kill the brush that's growing down there. I'm going to go down and check it out again next week, but I'm not expecting to be happy with it. duh12

I hope everyone has a fantastic day. thumbsup12


joe

Last edited by gymcandy1; 12/04/16 01:29 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091662
12/04/16 01:53 PM
12/04/16 01:53 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Online content
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Online Content
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
It's a winter wonderland here! Winter has finally arrived and the dogs are loving the snow! Me too!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091672
12/04/16 03:47 PM
12/04/16 03:47 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Hey Joe, you could be here in San Diego and getting fed up with the Chargers who want millions of dollars for a new stadium and yet they are soooo losing it's sad. Now they say they are moving to Los Angeles area in January after years of 'threats'. At this point, I could care less. Was a great team years ago and now it's all just 'negotiating' for more money from the taxpayers. I'd go for it IF they would start looking like they might win something. Not loving sports this year.


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091690
12/04/16 08:19 PM
12/04/16 08:19 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Back from the play. Always a lot of fun. Then dinner, and took boys home. Time for tea and a book and bed. Sweet dreams all sleep12

Last edited by looney4labs; 12/04/16 08:19 PM.

"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: looney4labs] #1091694
12/04/16 09:22 PM
12/04/16 09:22 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
See you all tomorrow. wave12


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091705
12/04/16 10:30 PM
12/04/16 10:30 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Online content
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Online Content
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Nighty night!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1091707
12/04/16 10:43 PM
12/04/16 10:43 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Good night, everyone. sleep12


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
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