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Toe-Tapping Tuesday #1099731
02/06/17 09:33 PM
02/06/17 09:33 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.

MARK TWAIN

`````````````````

Resume Reality

I KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH STRESSFUL SITUATIONS: I'm usually on Prozac. When I'm not, I take lots of cigarette and coffee breaks.

I SEEK A JOB THAT WILL DRAW UPON MY STRONG COMMUNICATION & ORGANIZATIONAL SKILLS: I talk too much and like to tell other people what to do.

I'M EXTREMELY ADEPT AT ALL MANNER OF OFFICE ORGANIZATION: I've used Microsoft Office.

I'M HONEST, HARD-WORKING AND DEPENDABLE: I pilfer office supplies.

MY PERTINENT WORK EXPERIENCE INCLUDES: I hope you don't ask me about all the McJobs I've had.

I TAKE PRIDE IN MY WORK: I blame others for my mistakes.

I'M BALANCED AND CENTERED: I'll keep crystals at my desk and do Tai Chi in the lunch room.

I HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR: I know a lot of corny, old jokes and I tell them badly.

I'M PERSONABLE: I give lots of unsolicited personal advice to co-workers.

I'M WILLING TO RELOCATE: As I leave San Quentin, anywhere's better.

I'M EXTREMELY PROFESSIONAL: I carry a Day-Timer.

MY BACKGROUND AND SKILLS MATCH YOUR REQUIREMENTS: You're probably looking for someone more experienced.

I AM ADAPTABLE: I've changed jobs a lot.

I AM ON THE GO: I'm never at my desk.

I'M HIGHLY MOTIVATED TO SUCCEED: The minute I find a better job, I'm outta there.

I HAVE FORMAL TRAINING: I'm a college drop-out.

I INTERACT WELL WITH CO-WORKERS: I've been accused of sexual harassment.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME AND CONSIDERATION: Wait! Don't throw me away!

I LOOK FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU SOON: Like, I'm gonna hold my breath waiting for your stupid form letter thanking me for my interest and wishing me luck in my future career.

``````````````````

Riding A Dead Horse

Old tribal wisdom says that when you discover you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount. Businesses, however, often try other strategies. These include...


1. Buying a stronger whip.

2. Changing riders.

3. Saying things like "This is the way we always have ridden this horse"

4. Appointing a committee to study the horse.

5. Arranging to visit other sites to see how they ride dead horses.

6. Increasing the standards to ride dead horses.

7. Appointing a tiger team to revive the dead horse.

8. Creating a training session to increase our riding ability.

9. Comparing the state of dead horses in today's environment.

10. Change the requirements declaring that "This horse is not dead".

11. Hire contractors to ride the dead horse.

12. Harnessing several dead horses together for increased speed.

13. Declaring that "No horse is too dead to beat."

14. Providing additional funding to increase the horse's performance.

15. Do a CA Study to see if contractors can ride it cheaper.

16. Purchase a product to make dead horses run faster.

17. Declare the horse is now "better, faster and cheaper."

18. Form a quality circle to find uses for dead horses.

19. Revisit the performance requirements for horses.

20. Say this horse was procured with cost as an independent variable.

21. Promote the dead horse to a supervisory position.

````````````````````

Road to Enlightenment

This is the road to enlightenment, revised...


1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path is narrow. In fact just bug off and leave me alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tyre.

3. The darkest hour is just before dawn. So if you' re going to steal your neighbour' s milk, that' s the time to do it.

4. Sex is like air. It' s not important unless you aren't getting any.

5. Don' t be irreplaceable. If you can' t be replaced, you can' t be promoted.

6. No one is listening until you pass gas.

7. Always remember you' re unique. Just like everyone else.

8. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

9. If you think nobody cares whether you' re alive or dead, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.

10. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you' re a mile away and you have their shoes.

11. If at first you don' t succeed, skydiving is not for you.

12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

13. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

14. If you tell the truth, you don' t have to remember anything.

15. Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windscreen.

16. Don' t worry; it only seems kinky the first time.

17. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

18. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

19. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

20. Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

21. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

22. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

23. Experience is something you don' t get until just after you need it.

````````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


It's umm........think......Today. I know it's Today because the Today show is on. thumbsup


Yesterday we got up to 78 degrees y'all, and it was humid, and for once I was very happy that it was windy. It was extremely windy. slapforehead


I pulled up the timbers that I was using as a walk. They don't work because some are warped, some are bowed, and they won't stay in place.


I went to Lowe's and bought some 2x4s and 1x6s and I had them cut them for me, and I came back and made a frame out of the 2x4s, stuck it in the ground, and screwed 16 1x6s to it, and made a boardwalk. yay


It looks like my deck in the back yard, and it only cost less than a third of what it would have cost me to do paving stones. bravo


I love decks, and boardwalks.


Great job Sorta Blond on your fencing project. That's a lot of work. tired


Have a happy day everyone. rah


joe

Last edited by gymcandy1; 02/06/17 09:33 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099734
02/06/17 09:48 PM
02/06/17 09:48 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Enjoy your Tuesday Boomers.


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099743
02/06/17 10:36 PM
02/06/17 10:36 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, well done on the walkway!

Sorta, same to you on the fence!

SpaceQ, one day closer to the weekend!

Have a happy day all!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099780
02/07/17 06:14 AM
02/07/17 06:14 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA

wave Good Morning Joe, Space, Ana and all. Coffee and tea are ready.
Wishing you all a Happy Tuesday! wave


Gerry
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099785
02/07/17 07:54 AM
02/07/17 07:54 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Wonderful Tuesday. Danish, BB Pancakes, French Toast, and Waffles in the NC. wavegirl


Connie
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099803
02/07/17 09:23 AM
02/07/17 09:23 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers lab

Joe, enjoy your new walk.

Space, wishing you a great day!

Gerry, coffee please and thank you.

Ana, great day wishes.

Connie, hope your day is good.

Happy Tuesday everybody! penguin


Gail
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099827
02/07/17 12:07 PM
02/07/17 12:07 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama

Terrific Tuesday ya'll puppy

We have bad weather coming in later, or so says the weatherman.

Seagy has a follow-up appointment for her surgery in a few minutes. Hate taking her cos she will totally freak out, but this should be the last one for a bit.

I am in full sneeze/cough/snort mode.....ick!

Have a great day ya'll wave


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099829
02/07/17 12:11 PM
02/07/17 12:11 PM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer
auntiegram  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
Good job Joe!! Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day!

Space have a lovely day!

Ana any fun plans?? We have snow and wind today! shiver Have a lovely day!

Gerry thanks for the coffee and have a lovely day!

Connie thanks for the Danish and have a lovely day!

Gail have a lovely day!

wave2
Nan

Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099833
02/07/17 01:03 PM
02/07/17 01:03 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Cool, rainy, nothing much going on so far today. Seems too calm for some reason. Monday was busy and now nothing. I feel like I should be out hammering and nailing something. Did that every day for 11-12 days, now nothing new to do. Ha. Like I'd really WANT a new project??? think

Hey Joe! Sounds like your boardwalk project is just the thing. I built one in my back yard where there is a 'low spot' and mud etc. would keep me from getting to my sheds. I used 2x4's for the base, but I had some lovely Cedar fence boards (milled smooth, rounded edges) that were left over from another fence project. I made the top walk area of them. Worked well except they are thin, and bendy and needed a third 2x4 support in the middle. Looks good AND I built it in 4x4 foot sections so I can easy lift and move each one if I have to. Everything around here is movable. Even my new and old fence around the property. it's bolted together in 8 foot sections. Just remove 4 bolts and the entire section pulls out. Ya never know when you might have to gain access to the neighbor's house. rotfl


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099856
02/07/17 02:59 PM
02/07/17 02:59 PM
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
niteowl07 Offline
BAAG Specialist
niteowl07  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
good afternoon everyone !

have a wonderful day !

scooting off to do stuff ,back later !

wave2

Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099861
02/07/17 03:24 PM
02/07/17 03:24 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Back from the vet just in time. Bad weather eek Dogs in full freak out mode lab


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: looney4labs] #1099871
02/07/17 05:29 PM
02/07/17 05:29 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
luck looney puppy

Good afternooon Boomers. wave

I like the way you think Ana. Bring on the weekend. lol


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099880
02/07/17 06:20 PM
02/07/17 06:20 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Welcome home, Space wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: looney4labs] #1099884
02/07/17 06:37 PM
02/07/17 06:37 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Thanks looney. Did the dogs settle down?


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099885
02/07/17 06:50 PM
02/07/17 06:50 PM
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 1,169
RURAL - SEYMOUR VICTORIA, MELB...
Taintedfury Offline
Addicted Boomer
Taintedfury  Offline
Addicted Boomer

Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 1,169
RURAL - SEYMOUR VICTORIA, MELB...
Good afternoon over there, enjoy your day everyone. wave2

Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099891
02/07/17 08:00 PM
02/07/17 08:00 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
They did, Space hamster How's your evening?

Good afternoon to you, Taintedfury. Although I think it's morning for you? What's on tap today?


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: looney4labs] #1099894
02/07/17 08:14 PM
02/07/17 08:14 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
It is good looney. I'm trying to enjoy the weather. It is 57 degrees now and the high is 40 tomorrow so i'm trying to make the most of tonight.


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Toe-Tapping Tuesday [Re: gymcandy1] #1099908
02/07/17 10:59 PM
02/07/17 10:59 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
We are supposed to have cooler weather coming in also, but we have rain and storms.

Time for bed. Sweet dreams all sleep


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
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