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Sip-n-Surf Sunday #1108164
04/22/17 09:52 PM
04/22/17 09:52 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
Oscar Wilde

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.

```````````````````

Laurel: Who is this boy?
Hardy: He is my distant brother.
Laurel: What do you mean by that??!
Hardy: Well, there are seven other brothers between us.

````````````

Jimmy was running helter-skelter in his uncle's house where he was spending his winter holidays. Despite many warnings, he continued to play inside the house and broke an ancient vase.

Uncle Andrew got very upset and screamed, "Do you have any idea how old that was? It was made in the eighteenth century.

"That's a relief!" exclaimed Jimmy, "almost thought it was brand new."

````````````

Principal to teacher, "Do you know which one of your students is Bubba's daughter?"

Teacher replies, "Yes sir, she is the one who erases her notebook when I erase the blackboard."

``````````````

In playschool, my 4 year old son was offered emmentaler cheese. He was not too happy about it and said to the lady serving the snacks, "Miss, I don't want holes in my cheese."

The lady replied, "It's all right honey, just bite around the holes and leave them on your dish."

`````````````

When Jim came back from school, David could feel something was wrong with his son.

David asked, "How was school? Something wrong?"

Jim replied, "The principal threw me out of school."

David said, "What the hell did you do boy?"

Jim replied, "There is this boy in my class called Pete. He was bragging to me that sticks and stones may break his bones but he ain't afraid of words."

David,"So what?"

Jim said, "So I threw my wordbook at him!"

David exclaimed, "Proud of you, son!"

``````````````

Father Reynold was having a conversation with a group of kids about how good behavior could help them go to Heaven. When he had finished, he asked them, "Where does everyone here want to go?"

Little Tina remarked, "Heaven!"

Father Reynold asked, "And what should you be to be able to get there?"

Little Harry replied, "Dead!"

```````````````

When I was tucking in my two little children to bed, I said that God had given us eyes so we could see the world. Then I touched my daughter Mary's ears and said that God gave us ears to hear. Touching little Jack's nose, I said that God gifted us nose to smell. Hands to work & eat, and legs to run.

Mary asked, "But Mom, God must have made a mistake with Jack because his nose runs and his feet smell."

```````````

When my 5 year old son Neil was scribbling something on a notepad, I asked him teasingly, "Are you writing a letter to God?"

Neil replied, "No. I am writing a letter to myself."

I asked, "All right. What are you writing to yourself?"

Neil replied, "There's no way to know. I have not received the letter yet."

`````````````

My friend Sara was teaching her 3 year old son about various professions.

She asked little Roy, "What does a tailor do?"

Roy replied, "A tailor makes clothes."

Sara then asked him, "What does the milkman do?"

Roy replied, "He delivers milk."

She then asked, "Okay, what does your Dad do?"

Roy, knowing that his father was in the Air Force, replied, "He flashes his card wherever he goes."

`````````````

Roy lived in the countryside with his family. One morning, he was helping his buffalo give birth, when he noticed that his daughter, Kelly, was watching the entire event with curious eyes.

Roy thought to himself that one day he will have to explain to her about the birds and the bees. Why not grab the opportunity and start now, as this was a good occasion.

After the process was over, and a little baby buffalo was born, Roy walked up to Kelly and asked, "Well sweetheart, do you have any questions?"

Little Kelly, still shaken by the entire experience, asked, "How fast was the calf going when it hit the buffalo?"

```````````````

My friend Jason had taken his 5 year old daughter, Susie to the garden. Jason was sitting on a park bench watching Susie play with a ball. Suddenly, she stopped playing, and looked at something intently. Then she came running to Jason and said, "Come Daddy, I want to show you something."

She lead him to a tree near which a sparrow lay dead. Suzie asked him, "What happened to the sparrow?"

Jason replied, "The sparrow died and went to Heaven."

Susie said, "Oh! So why did God throw it back to Earth?"

``````````````````

Pastor John Warren closed his eyes for 2 minutes and bowed his head, before he left for the church to deliver his sermon.

His little son, Jeremy, who always observed him do so many times, asked him one day, "Why do you do that Dad?"

Pastor John was happy to see that his son noticed his gestures and said, "Before I leave for church, I ask God to help me preach a good sermon."

Jeremy said innocently, "So why doesn't He do it?"

```````````````````

Little Neil was very excited to attend his uncle's wedding. Stepping down the aisle, he would take a step, stop, face the crowd, twist his fingers like claws, and make a growling noise.

At every step he would repeat it. He would take turns to be on the groom's side, the groom being his uncle, and do his act. And then he would go to the bride's side and repeat the clawing, growling. The crowd was amused by these dramatics and everyone started laughing.

Little Niel, however, was getting upset by all the attention & laughing and would have cried had his mother not consoled him.

When his mother asked him what he was doing, Little Niel replied, "I played the Ring Bear."

```````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. wave2


Today........ think.. is the day after the day before Sunday.


That's a great thing too because, the day before Saturday I decided to go to the sod farm the day after Friday, and then to the creek on the day before Monday. yay


I can't wait......well I guess I don't have to wait do I? slapforehead


So on the day before Sunday I found a rock at the sod farm, but I didn't bring it home. smile


There was no point to it. snicker


I've been waiting all day to use that lame joke. cool


I did find some pointy rocks though. I found four blades first, and then dug, and dug, and dug, and dug, and dug, and dug..............and dug some more until I finally found a point, and then I dug, and dug, and dug, and dug a bunch more and found a nuther point. WHEW! shocked


My hands are killing me, but I am one happy camper. happydance


My friend Shane is coming down here next Saturday, and I am going to meet him at the sod farm for a few hours.


Fortunately we are supposed to have storms, and 2 inches of rain on Thursday. Perfect!


Have a happy day everyone.


joe

Last edited by gymcandy1; 04/22/17 10:34 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108167
04/22/17 10:16 PM
04/22/17 10:16 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Thanks for the jokes Joe. thumbsup


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: Space Quest Fan] #1108168
04/22/17 10:32 PM
04/22/17 10:32 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
You are very welcome Space Quest Fan. wave

Have a super day.

joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108173
04/22/17 11:55 PM
04/22/17 11:55 PM
Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 69,973
MaG Offline
Sonic Boomer
MaG  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 69,973
Your arm must be sore now Joe! Glad you got points, more points, lots of points...

Hi SpaceQ.

wave to one and all.

Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108174
04/23/17 12:08 AM
04/23/17 12:08 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, it'd be exciting to go out with you! I wish I lived closer.

SpaceQ, have a great day!

MaG hearts

Have a happy day all! James will be going home and I'll be heading to the city for a old mansion tour with friends.

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108188
04/23/17 05:49 AM
04/23/17 05:49 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Online happy
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Online Happy
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
spring Good Morning Joe, Space, MaG, Ana and everyone. You must have quite a collection of points! Space hav a good dy. MaG enjoy! Ana I love to tour old mansion. So much history! Coffee and tea are ready. Have a Happy Sunday! spring


Gerry
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108192
04/23/17 06:45 AM
04/23/17 06:45 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Great Sunday. Breakfast out and a Sam's trip today. Danish, Eggs, Bacon, Ham, Sausage, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Biscuits and Gravy, and French Toast in the NC. spring


Connie
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108195
04/23/17 09:02 AM
04/23/17 09:02 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers lab

Joe, so glad you found points( and I like your no point joke).

Space, enjoy the day.

MaG, good day wishes to you.

Gerry, coffee please and thank you.

Ana, have a wonderful day.

Connie, enjoy your breakfast out and Sam's.

Wishing everyone a great Sunday! car


Gail
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: GBC] #1108197
04/23/17 09:28 AM
04/23/17 09:28 AM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good morning everyone. It is supposed to be a beautiful day here today. I hope it is nice where you are too. smile


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108204
04/23/17 10:51 AM
04/23/17 10:51 AM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
Good morning Joe MaG Ana SQF Gail Connie Gerry and the rest of the gang when you're up and at em today

First and foremost...we have Grandson #7 woot

He actually set foot on Planet Earth yesterday on Earth Day at 1203 AM but with the night full of phone calls and little sleep my brain was a bit addled

Joe, thanks for starting my day off with a smile ... there is a point to that yes

Second and just as important Happy Sunday everyone laugh

Off to Garden and listen to whale music wave2


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108207
04/23/17 11:00 AM
04/23/17 11:00 AM
Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 69,973
MaG Offline
Sonic Boomer
MaG  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 69,973
Congrats soot and L4L for the new grandson! yay
Wish Mom and baby a restful, healthy future! bravo

Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108215
04/23/17 11:37 AM
04/23/17 11:37 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Congrats, soot and L4L! YOu'll have your own football team in no time! rotfl


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108227
04/23/17 02:15 PM
04/23/17 02:15 PM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Congrats on the new edition to the family tree, soot and L4L. smile


Connie
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: connie] #1108232
04/23/17 05:15 PM
04/23/17 05:15 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Congratulations to looney and soot. happydance


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Sip-n-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1108377
04/24/17 06:34 PM
04/24/17 06:34 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
Thanks everyone laugh

We are happy campers happydance


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
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