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Hump Day #1117335
07/11/17 10:00 PM
07/11/17 10:00 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
Wernher von Braun

The best computer is a man, and it’s the only one that can be mass-produced by unskilled labor.

```````````

One of our interns asked 
another if she was planning to sign up for the company’s 401(k).

“I’m considering it,” replied the second intern.

Later, the first intern approached me looking concerned.

“I did the math,” she said, “and 401K is almost 250 miles. She’ll never make it!”

```````````

The first time my mother flew, she was a nervous wreck. During takeoff, the roar from the engines proved 
reassuring—it meant they were working, she reasoned. But when the plane leveled off, so did the engines. Grabbing the armrests, she asked aloud, “Did we stop?”

``````

I’m now in high school, so when I ran into my third-grade teacher, I doubted she would remember me.

“Hi, Miss Butcher,” I said.

“Hi, Eddie,” she replied.

“So you do remember me?” I asked.

“Sure. You don’t always leave a good impression, but it is a lasting one.”

```````````

My three-year-old sat in the bathroom with me, watching as I 
removed my dentures and brushed them. After a few minutes, he asked, “Can you take your ears off too?”

````````````

We were stocking up on 
green beans at the farmers’ market when we asked the young girl 
helping us for 15 pounds’ worth.

“I can only sell you ten pounds of beans,” she said.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because my scale only goes up to ten pounds.”

`````````

The DMV was as crowded and noisy as ever. When I finally got to the 
window, I asked the clerk, “Does the never-ending line of loud people ever drive you crazy?”
She shook her head. “We call it job security.”

``````````

Dad rarely dresses up, so when he left the bedroom decked out in a suit and tie, he wanted to commemorate the moment. Handing me a camera, he asked, “Mind taking a selfie of me?”

```````````

Scene: Me driving by a Taco Bell.

Sign: Now Hiring Managers.

[Two weeks later …]

Sign: Now Hiring Managers. Background Checks Required.

```````````

Our boss asked the new mail-room guy to make three copies of 
an office key. The guy returned ten minutes later with the copies … which he’d made on the Xerox machine.

````````````

Shane works in the deli department of a large supermarket chain, where he often finds himself in trouble. Just look at the notes management has supposedly written to him:

“Shane, stop putting Some 
Assembly Required stickers on 
the eight-piece chickens.”

“Shane, any free samples you 
give must come from the deli, not electronics.”

“Shane, when a customer asks where to find a product, give them an aisle number, not directions to 
Albertsons.”

````````````

I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth when my squad leader barged in. He was holding a toothbrush, which he proceeded to use to scrub underneath the rim of a toilet.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Hazing the new guy,” he said with a grin.

“You do know that he could get ill from the bacteria on the toilet.”

His reply was quick and to the point: “You didn’t.”

``````````````

A Briton flies into Australia 
and is asked by the immigration 
officer, “Do you have any felony 
convictions?”

The Briton replies, “Sorry. I didn’t realize that was still a requirement.”

``````````````

We were at a red light when a car pulled up, its music blasting. “He’ll be deaf before he’s 25,” I said.

“It won’t help us,” my wife replied. “He’ll only turn it up.”

`````````

Before beginning the service, our pastor read aloud a note he’d been handed moments earlier. “It says here that I should announce that there will be no B.S. tomorrow morning,” he said. He tucked the piece of paper into a pocket and added, “I’m hoping they mean ‘Bible Study.’”

```````````

Good morning everyboomie. wave2


Welcome to another day in the life. smile


Yesterday was a very arduous day at the creek, only to find one pitiful little damaged point on the same sandbar where I found the last one at the creek. I covered as much creek as possible, but early in the morning it was hard to see through the deeper water. duh


At least I didn't come back empty handed. wink


It got up to 95 degrees. blush


Today I'm taking Baby to the vet.


Actually I'm drained from the day.


Have a Happy Hump Day everyone. yes


joe




Last edited by gymcandy1; 07/11/17 10:01 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117338
07/11/17 10:20 PM
07/11/17 10:20 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, my thoughts are with you today. hearts

Have a great day all!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117369
07/12/17 04:58 AM
07/12/17 04:58 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
summer Good Morning Joe, Ana and everyone. Joe hope all goes well with Baby today. Coffee and tea are ready. Wishing you all a sunny day! summer


Gerry
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117373
07/12/17 06:35 AM
07/12/17 06:35 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers wavegirl

Joe, hope things go okay at the Vets with Baby. Hugs!

Gerry, have a great day! Coffee us most welcome.

Ana, good day wishes to you.

A walk with Nina this morning. Wishing everyone here and on their way a good day! lab


Gail
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117380
07/12/17 07:36 AM
07/12/17 07:36 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Great Hump Day. Joe, hugs for you and pets for Baby. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, and French Toast in the NC. summer


Connie
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117408
07/12/17 10:25 AM
07/12/17 10:25 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Happy Hump Day ya'll puppy

I'm off to the dentist in a bit...oh joy.....but it must be done eek Then I'll come home and collapse as the dentist completely drains me.

Son can hardly walk this morning. Not sure what happened, but he is dragging his leg. Was fine when he went to bed, but woke up at 2 in pain sad

Vet emailed to let me know that Keoki's blood tests are still a bit off, so will talk to him this afternoon and decide where to go from here.

Joe, thinking of you and Baby. Hugs

Ana, you still out of the corner?

Gerry wavegirl

Gail, have a great day.

Connie, I'm gonna enjoy those hashbrowns. Thanks


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117415
07/12/17 11:07 AM
07/12/17 11:07 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Good lucky with you dentist visit L4L. Must be a dentist sort of day. I'm calling for an appointment to fix a filling/cap that I broke yesterday biting into of all things, an oriental meat/potato ball. Yummy, but the hamburger in it had bits of bone. Darn. Bit one. Hurt, figured I was OK and then wham! Another one (and I was being so careful) and the tooth cracked off in 2 chunks. Ugh. Dunno if it's gonna need a cap or what. Hate this. Money all the time for my teeth. Thank goodness for one of those credit cards for medical stuff. It's sure come in handy lately.


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117434
07/12/17 02:26 PM
07/12/17 02:26 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Sorta, what CC for medical stuff?

Dentist went fine...I have a few gum line cavities sad which is par for the course for me. My mouth is super dry and I can't use the stuff they make for that. So I have to get with hubby and find a time when he can take me in.

Now it's time to take my achy mouth out on the books....book cooking time.


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117439
07/12/17 02:54 PM
07/12/17 02:54 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
It's a bank card you put pre tax money on in the beginning of the year for what you think will be your medical expenses. We have A TASC Card that we put money on every year to cover deductibles and chiropractic visits.

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117441
07/12/17 03:07 PM
07/12/17 03:07 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Ahhh, so if you don't use it, do you lose it?


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117445
07/12/17 03:33 PM
07/12/17 03:33 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Yes, it hasn't happened to me, but it has to my daughter and others. They quick stock up on "medical needs" such as bandages, contact lenses, feminine products, extra prescription refills if available etc to spend the money.

Sorry to hear about your dentist visit and the cavities! I hate dentists!

Gail, hearts


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117446
07/12/17 03:36 PM
07/12/17 03:36 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Me too.....because of the dryness of my mouth, I'm prone to small, gum line cavities. Oh well...


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117457
07/12/17 04:42 PM
07/12/17 04:42 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Actually it's not the pre-paid one you are referring to Ana. It's a card called Care Credit. I got the application from my dentist last year. It's a true credit card which comes with 6 months of no interest depending on the charges. Without that I'd not be able to cover the CAP that was needed. Darn darn. There goes another thousand bucks that I don't have. But my dentist (who I have been with exclusively for 48 years) has done a great job of saving most of my teeth. I was one of his first patients when I was in my last year of college and never left. He was young and handsome with the most gorgeous blue eyes, and I was single and only a few years younger. Dreamy man, even though he now has white hair and mine is going gray. We laugh about it and also about the 'husbands and wives' we both have gone through over the years.

Hate the dental part, but love seeing my 'friend'.


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Hump Day [Re: Sorta Blonde] #1117459
07/12/17 04:46 PM
07/12/17 04:46 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good afternoon Boomers.


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117462
07/12/17 05:03 PM
07/12/17 05:03 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Thanks, Sorta. We've been with our dentist for a long time, but not quite that long.

Afternoon, Space, welcome home wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117463
07/12/17 05:07 PM
07/12/17 05:07 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Hi SpaceQ, are you getting our endless storms? We are floating away here!

Sorta, I see! Sounds like a great card to get interest free medical payments. It's soi expensive!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Hump Day [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1117470
07/12/17 07:37 PM
07/12/17 07:37 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
No storms today Ana. Maybe they will be here tomorrow. duh


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117475
07/12/17 08:25 PM
07/12/17 08:25 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
My thoughts and prayers are with you and Baby Joe angel

Hello everyone laugh

I've worked
I've shopped
And now I think
its time to drop!

Off to garden and then sleep


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117482
07/12/17 08:57 PM
07/12/17 08:57 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Time for bed and a book. Sweet dreams sleep


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1117490
07/12/17 09:58 PM
07/12/17 09:58 PM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Time to call it a night. Read all the posts and just here to say good night all. A note: Went to Rob and Jens to say hello to their new puppy Justsus. What a cutie. Still smells like new puppie, Lovin it. I'll send pics when I have them.

Time to say good night.

Midgie hearts wavegirl


Just do it.
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