Muhammad Ali
Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth.
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An aching back sent me stumbling to the drugstore for relief. After a search I found what I was looking for: a selection of heating pads specifically for people with back pain—all on the bottom shelf.
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My wife and I were having lunch at a fashionable eatery in Annapolis when we noticed what looked like a familiar face at the next table. Screwing up my courage, I asked, “Excuse me. Aren’t you Marlin Fitzwater, the former White House press secretary?”
“Yes, I am,” he acknowledged, and graciously interrupted his lunch to talk to us.
As we were leaving the restaurant, I remarked to the hostess, “Do you know you have Marlin Fitzwater on the terrace?”
“I’m not sure about that,” she replied, “but we have Perrier and Evian at the bar.”
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A friend of ours was puzzled with the odd messages left on his answering machine. Day after day friends and family would talk and then say, “Beep.” He discovered the reason for the joke when he decided to listen to his greeting.
“Hi,” it said. “I’m not in right now, so please leave a beep after the message.”
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My friend John and I, determined to see the world, signed on a Norwegian freighter as deckhands. We were being trained as helmsmen, and John’s first lesson was given by the mate, a seasoned but gentle white-haired seafarer. John was holding the heading he had been given, when the mate ordered, “Come starboard.”
Pleased at knowing immediately which way starboard was, John left the helm and walked over to his instructor.
The mate had an incredulous look on his face as the helm swung freely, but he merely asked politely, “Could you bring the ship with you?”
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While rummaging through her attic, my friend Kathryn found an old shotgun. Unsure about how to dispose of it, she called her parents. “Take it to the police station,” her mother suggested.
My friend was about to hang up when her mother added, “And Kathryn?”
“Yes, Mom?”
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During a beautiful spring afternoon, I was attending the Cheat River Festival in West Virginia. Just as I stopped to listen to a folk singer, a group of exhibitors, dragging out tools and sawhorses, began setting up their display booth nearby. All their shouting and hammering made it difficult to enjoy the music. The noise they made got louder and even more obnoxious and intrusive as time went on.
Finally, to everyone’s relief, they completed the construction. As a finishing touch, they hung a sign on their booth. It read “Silent Auction.”
“Call first.”
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On vacation in Hawaii, my step- mom, Sandy, called a café to make reservations for 7 p.m. Checking her book, the cheery young hostess said, "I’m sorry, all we have is 6:45. Would you like that?"
"That’s fine," Sandy said.
"Okay," the woman confirmed. Then she added, "Just be advised you may have to wait 15 minutes for your table."
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My father is a skilled CPA who is not great at self-promotion. So when an advertising salesman offered to put my father’s business placard in the shopping carts of a supermarket, my dad jumped at the chance. Fully a year went by before we got a call that could be traced to those placards. “Richard Larson, CPA?” the caller asked.
“That’s right,” my father answered. “May I help you?”
“Yes,” the voice said. “One of your shopping carts is in my yard and I want you to come and get it.”
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A friend of mine was enjoying his new car’s powerful sound system by driving along with the volume way up. At a traffic light, he heard someone shout, "Hey, do you mind?"
Stopped next to him was a young man in an open convertible. He pointed to an object in his hand and said, "Can’t you see I’m on the phone?"
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My husband, Daniel, had been promoted to a newly created position. He was eager to find out what his official title was, so when his business cards finally arrived, I was surprised that he seemed reluctant to show me. After some persuasion, Daniel gave me a card, naming him director of product efficiency. “Wow,” I responded, “that sounds impressive.”
“Not really,” Daniel replied as he removed my thumb from the acronym underneath. It read DOPE.
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Good morning everyboomie.
Anybody ready for another weekend?
I am. I've been working way too hard this week. PHEW!
I did go for more groceries this morning, and then exercised, and did stuff around the house, and napped a little, and then this evening I mowed the lawns. Pretty good day I'd say.
If I do anything at all productive on Friday it'll have to be house cleaning. Nothing else too do, except more exercise.
I was looking at the weather forecast for the rest of this month, and there's not one day over 95 degrees forecast. In fact, most of the days in August are around the low 90s and upper 80s.
I find that unbelievable........and cool. That's a pretty cool August if those numbers hold up.
It's still a far cry from the mid 60s that I'm waiting for.
Just think though, Lowe's will be getting their Halloween decorations in before the end of the month.
Ana, if your finding artifacts I would love to see pictures of them, please.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
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Don't know where the time has gone! Celebrating tomorrow with a wonderful gathering of family and friends! So looking forward to it! 
Have an easy peasy day!
to the wee one...who is not so wee anymore. 
