E. Joseph Cossman

If you want to test your memory, try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today.
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Some things that make you go hmmm....

1. Why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways?

2. Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

3. Can I yell "movie" in a crowded firehouse?

4. Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

5. How do a fool and his money GET together?

6. Why does Hawaii have interstate highways?

7. How is it that a building burns up as it burns down?

8. If a train station is where the train stops, what is a workstation?

9. If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?

10. If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax?

11. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

12. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

13. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

14. Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds" fee on money they already know you don't have?

15. Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines?

16. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

17. If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?

18. What are Preparation A through Preparation G?

19. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?

20. Did Washington flash a quarter when asked for ID?

21. How come there aren't B batteries?

22. If the post office has machines that can sort snail mail at 1000's of times per minute, then why do they give it to a little old man on a bike to deliver?

23. How do "Do not walk on the grass" signs get there?

24. Why do black olives come in cans and green olives come in jars?

25. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?

26. How is it possible to have a civil war?

27. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

28. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

29. If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2?

30. Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?

31. If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?

32. Crime doesn't pay...does that mean that my job is a crime?

33. How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

34. How do you know that honesty is the best policy until you have tried some of the others?

35. How do you throw away a garbage can?

36. How does a thermos know if the drink should be hot or cold?

37. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

38. Do you realize how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?

39. If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?

40. If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

41. What happens to an 18 hour bra after 18 hours?

42. Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

43. Why do hot dogs come 10 to a package and hot dog buns only 8?

44. Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings and then put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up?

45. Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman's chest, but he ducks when the gun is thrown at him?

46. Why is it that night falls but day breaks?

47. Why is it that you must wait until night to call it a day?

48. What if the Hokey Pokey IS what its all about?

49. When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?

50. What happened to the first 6 "ups"?
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This is a list of what state mottos should really be...

Alabama:
At Least We're not Mississippi

Alaska:
11,623 Eskimos Can't be Wrong!

Arizona:
Dehyd-rific!

Arkansas:
Litterasy Ain't Everthing

California:
As Seen on TV

Colorado:
If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother

Connecticut:
Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less Character

Delaware:
(this was left blank--does this mean Delaware is too small to have a
motto?)

Florida:
Ask Us About Our Grandkids

Georgia:
We Put the "Fun" in Fundamentalist Extremism

Hawaii:
Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)

Idaho:
More Than Just Potatoes... Well Okay, We're Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good

Illinois:
Gateway to Iowa

Indiana:
2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free

Iowa:
Land of James T. Kirk

Kansas:
First Of The Rectangle States

Kentucky:
Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names

Louisiana:
We're Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign

Maine:
Cheap Lobster

Maryland:
A Thinking Man's Delaware

Massachusetts:
Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)

Michigan:
First Line of Defense From the Canadians

Minnesota:
For Sale

Mississippi:
Come Feel Better About Your Own State

Missouri:
Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work

Montana:
Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomer, and Very Little Else

Nebraska:
Ask About Our State Motto Contest

Nevada:
Whores and Poker!

New Hampshire:
Go Away and Leave Us Alone

New Jersey:
You Want a #$@%#!@ Motto? I Got Yer #$@%#!@ Motto Right Here!

New Mexico:
Lizards Make Excellent Pets

New York:
You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to an Attorney

North Carolina: Tobacco is a Vegetable

North Dakota:
Um... We've got... Um... Dinosaur Bones? Yeah, Dinosaur Bones!

Ohio:
Don't Judge Us by Cleveland

Oklahoma:
Like the Play...Only No Singing

Oregon:
Spotted Owl, It's What's For Dinner

Pennsylvania:
Cook With Coal

Rhode Island:
We're Not REALLY An Island

South Carolina:
Remember the Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender

South Dakota:
Closer Than North Dakota

Tennessee:
The Educashun State

Texas:
Se Hablo Ingles

Utah:
Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus

Vermont:
Yep

Virginia:
Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?

Washington:
Help! We're Overrun By Nerds and Slackers!

Washington, D.C.:
Wanna Be Mayor?

West Virginia:
One Big Happy Family -- Really!

Wisconsin:
Come Cut Our Cheese

Wyoming:
Wynot?
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Good morning everyboomie.


Almost to Friday now.


You know what they say about 'almost.'


It's only good in horseshoes and hand grenades.


What - a - bummer!


I was really wanting Friday to get here, so Saturday can get here, because it looks like Saturday is going to be my best opportunity to go head hunting. I can't go Thursday, because I don't have a sitter for Missy. I could go Friday, but it's supposed to be pretty humid. I may still go then, it's just a killer being out there digging and sifting in high humidity.


We had more thunderstorms last night, and a pretty good rain, and I also want it to be a few day past any rain when I go out there. You can't sift wet dirt very well.


I just thought y'all should know................in case you don't here from me again.


Have a happy day everyone.


joe

Joe, I hope that your day goes by fast so Friday will here!

I did not get caught up yesterday enough to go canoeing, so maybe tomorrow will be a good day to go. So much to do!

Have a happy day all!

Ana

Hope Saturday arrives for you soon, Joe.

Hope you're able to go canoeing this time, Ana.

It's Wednesday night here, and I fell asleep with the light on yet again. I blame Jupiter, since he curled up beside me, and I was stuck after that. Time to head back to sleep, as it's back to the 4 am wake up time for me tomorrow. I blame Saga for this because I don't want to blame Jupiter again.

Have a great Thursday, everyone.

Good Morning Joe, Ana, venus and all. Joe Hope you get to hunt Friday too. Ana may be canoeing today? Venus enjoy your day. Coffee and tea are ready.
Wishing you all a Happy Day!

Good morning everyone, have a Great Thump Day. I won $10 and 2 free drinks at Queen of Hearts last night. A routine visit with my Oncologist this morning. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, and French Toast in the NC.

Good Morning Boomers

Joe, hope Friday is a good day for your head hunting.

Ana, enjoy a canoe day if you decide to go.

Venus, sweet dreams.

Gerry, coffee needed this morning. Thanks.

Connie, congrats on the win. Hope the Doc visit goes well.

Wishing everyone a wonderful day!

Thumping Good Thursday ya'll

Hot and humid...that's the ticket. Not sure what the day will be...will know for sure by 8 p.m

Joe, love your quote! I take it Missy is not a patient headhunter?

Ana, hope you get to that canoe soon.

Venus, how is Saga fitting in now.

Happy Day, Gerry

Congrats on the win, Connie, and at the docs.

Gail, hope the day is super.

Good quote of the day, Joe! I thought, geez how can I remember what I was worrying about a YEAR ago, and then it came to me. It's the same thing I worry about every day. How to pay my BILLS! Easy.

Hmmm...interesting quote Joe

Glad it doesn't apply to me as I can't remember what I had for breakfast last week

Hola Cola everyone Earned another four quarters today...whew!

And looking forward to bed tonight...actually that's every night these days.

Thanks for all you do Joe! You put a smile on my face every day and many times I just don't get the chance to say thanks!

L4L, Saga is fitting in well in her part of the apartment, which is actually the larger area. She and Jupiter still don't get along, but Jupiter has inherited kitty version Venus's space now and gets to stay with me, so he's happy.

I'm off to sleep. Good night, everyone.