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#1133632 - 11/30/17 07:18 PM TGIF
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 31957
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.

~Henny Youngman~
`````````````````

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father [never having seen an elevator] responded "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction.

The walls opened up again and a beautiful 24-year-old woman stepped out. The father said to his son, "Go get your mother."

```````````


Things We Learned From The Movies


*During all police investigations, it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.

*All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555.

*Beds have special L-shaped cover sheets which reach up to the armpit level on a woman; but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.

*The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there, and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty

*Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.

*A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

*Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, you should open the fridge door and use that light instead.

*If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.

*Cars that crash will invariably burst into flames.

*Stripping to the waist can make a man invulnerable to bullets.

*If you find yourself caught up in a misunderstanding that could be cleared up quickly with a simple explanation, for goodness sake, keep your mouth shut.

*Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.

*A cough is usually the sign of a terminal illness.

*All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts, so you know exactly when they're going to go off.

*When in love, it is customary to burst into song.

*When confronted by an evil international terrorist, sarcasm and wisecracks are your best weapons.

*One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them than 20 men firing at 1 man.

*If being fired at by Germans, hide in a river - or even a bath. German bullets are unable to penetrate water.

*Laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of an invading alien civilization.

*Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper clippings - especially if any of their family or friends have died in a strange boating accident.

*All computer disks will work in all computers, regardless of software.

*Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

*When they are alone, foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

*If you are a hero, you never face charges for manslaughter or criminal damage despite laying entire cities to waste by your actions.

*You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.

*Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds - unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

*You can tell if somebody is British because he will be wearing a bow tie.

*When driving a car, it is normal to look not at the road but rather at the person sitting beside you or in the back seat for the entire journey.

*Taxi drivers don't require exact or even approximate payment - the first bill you pull from your pocket is always correct.

*Having a job of any kind will make a father forget his son's eighth birthday.

*Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before retirement.

*The more a man and a woman hate each other, the more likely they will fall in love.

`````````````````

Good morning everyboomie. yay


It's been a long trip, but we've arrived at another Friday. I hope you all enjoyed the journey. wink


I really enjoyed today. I treated it like a Spring day after a long cold hard Winter. yes


I propped my door open so I wouldn't have to get up and let Missy in and out, and I lay on the couch and slept all day. dance


Actually me and the mutt had a nice walk about the park, and then I did some badly needed kitchen cleaning. thumbsup


Now, I'm preparing for an evening of disappointment, as I ready myself to watch another Cowboy game, and hope against hope that they can muster a win after three dismal efforts in their last three games. rolleyes


Have a happy day everyone. rah rah rah


joe
_________________________
There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats

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#1133649 - 11/30/17 10:46 PM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 74230
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Joe, it looks like you are watching a good game! I know it isn't over yet, but it looks promising!

I'm looking forward to a weekend too! My weekdays are busy these days!

Have a happy day, all!

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#1133651 - 11/30/17 11:19 PM Re: TGIF [Re: BrownEyedTigre]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 31957
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
joy YEAH!
_________________________
There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats

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#1133658 - 12/01/17 04:54 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
True Blue Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 22300
Loc: Marlborough USA
fall Good Morning Joe, Ana and all. Coffee, tea and hot chocolate are ready.
Wishing you all a great Friday. fall
_________________________
Gerry

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#1133666 - 12/01/17 07:08 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Online   content
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 9967
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Wonderful Friday. Dinner and Karaoke tonight at the Eagles. Today is Robert's Birthday. He is going to the Magic game tonight with a friend. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, and French Toast in the NC. fall
_________________________
Connie

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#1133669 - 12/01/17 07:39 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 18130
Loc: Massachusetts
Morning Boomers hamster

Joe, looks like you had a good day!

Ana, enjoy the dogs. Have a good day!

Gerry, thanks for the coffee.

Connie enjoy the Eagles. Happy Birthday to Robert. birthday

Everybody enjoy the day! lab
_________________________
Gail

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#1133679 - 12/01/17 09:20 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/16/05
Posts: 26712
Loc: Usually up an Alabama Tree
Good morning Joe Ana Connie Gerry Gail and the rest of the Boomer gang

WOOT.. the Cowboys won

TGIF

See you all tonight after work

Coffee and Danish to go! wave2
_________________________
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music

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#1133685 - 12/01/17 10:35 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 47241
Loc: Alabama
Fantastic Friday Ya'll puppy

Woohoo, we made it to the weekend. It's so hot right now...all the windows open. Supposed to be cold late next week.

Joe, I know you enjoyed that game last night.

Ana, what's up with you today?

Gerry, I'm heading for the coffee. Thanks.

Connie, birthday to Robert. Have fun tonight.

Gail, have a great day.

Soot kissy
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#1133688 - 12/01/17 11:28 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
family Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 06/16/10
Posts: 2885
Loc: georgia
joe you better get champagne and cake cowboys won 38 to 14. cool lab puppy


Edited by family (12/01/17 11:28 AM)

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#1133700 - 12/01/17 12:25 PM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
MsMercury Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/08/06
Posts: 12079
Loc: Scotland
Hello Boomers, just stopping by to say 'Hi'....hope you are all well, wishing you a great day!

Mary hearts wavegirl
_________________________
"It's not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts." puppy

I'm not getting old....just 'Marvelously Mature'! grin

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#1133709 - 12/01/17 01:24 PM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 47241
Loc: Alabama
Hi ya Family, were you watching the game?

Hi ya Mary, hope your day is great too wavegirl
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#1133711 - 12/01/17 01:29 PM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
family Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 06/16/10
Posts: 2885
Loc: georgia
part of it and the score is on the computer.

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#1133733 - 12/01/17 09:01 PM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/16/05
Posts: 26712
Loc: Usually up an Alabama Tree
woot

Another day of work is behind me with just the weekend ahead...oh yeah!!

Hoping everyone had a Fantastic Friday and wishing everyone a quiet Friday TGIF evening

We decided to eat at one of our favorite Mexican restaurants this evening...now pleasantly plump

Take care everyone...catch you later

...time for bed sleep


Edited by soot (12/02/17 12:37 AM)
_________________________
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music

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