The two most powerful warriors are patience and time.
~Leo Tolstoy~
`````````````
If I ever go missing, you should put my picture on beer rather than milk bottles. This way, my friends will find me faster.
`````````````
I was going to start a Procrastinators Club. But then I realized I’d have to reject anyone who actually turned up at the meeting so I decided to put it off again.
`````````
I heard the Secret Service had to change their commands.
They can't say "Get down!" anymore when the President is under attack.
Now it's "Donald! Duck!"
``````
I read the mass chicken farms pump chickens full of antibiotics. Well, that would at least explain why chicken soup is so good when you have a cold.
```````
Today, I found a mosquito, I sat right next to it and kept on buzzing so he would see what it’s like, not being able to sleep!
``````````
I spent half an hour trying to take off my girlfriend's bra. I gave up. I wish I'd never tried it on.
``````````
What can I eat in the evening in front of the TV that wouldn’t make me fat?
-
Your fingernails.
````````````
Doctor, how can I live longer than 100 years?
Do you smoke?
No.
Do you eat too much?
No.
Do you go to bed late?
No.
Do you have affairs with promiscuous women?
No.
Then why would you want to live more than 100 years?
``````
Random fun facts that are truly amazing, very weird, sometimes crazy, very unusual. 2.The struggle is real for the ferret – if a female ferret in heat doesn’t find a mate, she can die.
3.A sloth takes 2 weeks to digest the food he’s eaten.
4.In the USA, there are more Chinese restaurants than all the McDonald’s, KFCs, Burger Kings and Wendy’s put together.
5.If you kept yelling for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would produce enough sound energy to heat up a cup of tea.
6.There are approximately 100,000 hairs on an average human head.
7.At any given moment, about 0.7% of the people in the world are drunk.
8.In 2001, a seven foot bull shark bit off a boy’s arm. His uncle not only saved the boy, but dived in after the shark, wrestled it to shore where the shark was shot, retrieved the boy’s arm and it was sewn back on in the hospital.
9.When you say “a million seconds”, it means 11 and a half days. “A billion seconds” would be over 31 years.
10.There are more English speakers in China than in the United States.
``````````````
Good morning everyboomie.
What, Monday again? Didn't we just do this a week ago?
Well our 80% chance of rain came and went with Sunday, and we got enough rain to wet my sidewalk, but not completely.
I watched this huge 300 mile long mass of rain as it approached us from the South. There was no way it could miss us, so as it got right to us, it parted like the Red sea, and passed around us leaving us high and dry, then passed across Oklahoma covering the whole state.
So once again the fickle finger of fate cast it's dark shadow over the lowly down trodden arrowhead hunter. His dreams crushed and swept into the gutter by the wind.
The dry gutter.
Other than that, it was a pretty fair day.
Not that we had a fair going on here.
Have a happy day everyone.
You da best!
joe
acebook
witter
Joe! I've watched it happen here too. There are times I'm convinced we live in some type of special zone that repels rain when we need it. I hope you will get it with the next round. 
It should be an interesting week, as they're calling for snow on Tuesday and possibly Wednesday as well. 
Is Monday part of your 4 day weekend, or did that start on Thursday?
