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Joe's Super Sip and Surf Sunday #1151525
05/19/18 07:21 PM
05/19/18 07:21 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
“Fish who are caught and released are like the aquatic equivalent of people who claim to have been abducted by aliens.”

~Bill Murray~
`````````````


An elderly couple talk in the evening:
“Honey, I’m so sorry that I let out my anger at you so often. How do you manage to stay so calm with my foul moods?”
“I always go and clean the toilet when that happens.”
“And that helps?”
“Yes, I’m using your toothbrush.”

`````````

Honey, do you think I gained weight?
-
No, I think the living room got smaller.

`````

Honey, what will you give me for our 25th anniversary?
-
A trip to Thailand?
-
Wow, that’s awesome, and for our 50th anniversary?
-
Then I'll fly you back home.

`````````

I got really angry with my sat nav today, and told it to go to hell. Twenty minutes later, it brought me in front of my mother-in-law’s house.

``````

A man noticed his credit card has been stolen - but he never reported it. Apparently the thief was spending considerably less than his wife.“

``````

A man and his wife have to go to a doctor. The doctor asks, “Do you share the same blood group?”

The husband replies, “We must by now. She’s been sucking my blood for years.”

``````

What's the difference between a bachelor and a married man? Bachelor comes home, checks out what's in the fridge & goes to bed. Married man comes home, checks out what's in the bed & goes to the fridge.

``````

Mommy, why are all the cars beeping their horns?

Because there’s a wedding going on.

But isn’t the horn a warning signal, Mommy?

Exactly, son.

``````

“I’ve had it with your silly remarks about my weight. I’m leaving you!”

“But honey, what about our child?”

“What child?!”

“You’re not pregnant???”

`````

Wife to husband: “Honey, guess who’s not wearing any panties and bra today?”

Husband, “Ah, so that’s what's pulling the wrinkles out of your face!”

````````

Childhood is when you go to the toilet in the night and then you run back and jump in your bed, glad that the monster under the bed didn’t get you.

Adulthood is when you try not to wake the monster lying in bed next to you.

``````

At a medical check-up:

Do you do dangerous sports?

Well, sometimes I talk back at my wife.

``````

Arguing with the wife is a lot like trying to read the Terms of Use on the internet. In the end you just give up and go “I Agree”.

`````

I’ve never been married, but I can imagine how it feels. I once had to march for 10 hours with a stone stuck in my shoe.

``````

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised to hear it.

``````

Good morning everyboomie. wave2


Thank you Leeann. Great to see you in the diner. kissy


Saturday morning was great here. We had high clouds and a breeze that felt real good. I would have loved to have been out at the sod farm, just walking around and hoping to get lucky. yes


It's funny how your priorities change over time. I used to go to bars and walk around all night hoping to get lucky. blush


Now I'm head hunting in a big open field. smile


Anyway I had other things to do today, like mowing my yard again. Yahoo! woot


You can bet it warmed up pretty quick when I started that. shocked


Have a super Sunday everyone. urock


joe



Last edited by gymcandy1; 05/19/18 07:23 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Joe's Super Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1151537
05/19/18 09:23 PM
05/19/18 09:23 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, I could have my grass cut twice a week with all the rain we have had. Sorry you didn't get to the farm.

Not sure what today will bring for me yet.

Have a happy day all!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Joe's Super Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1151562
05/20/18 02:09 AM
05/20/18 02:09 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Joe, you're just hoping to get lucky in a different way now. lol Hope you get to go back to the farm soon.

Hope you find something fun to do today, Ana.

It's Saturday night, and I'm off to sleep. I have a voice lesson tomorrow. thumbsup Luckily, I've practiced a lot this week, so things should go well. grin

Have a great Sunday, everyone. spring


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Joe's Super Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1151569
05/20/18 05:08 AM
05/20/18 05:08 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,108
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Online happy
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Online Happy
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,108
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana, venus and everyone. Having a great time with family visit! Coffee and tea are ready. Enjoy your day! spring


Gerry
Re: Joe's Super Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1151592
05/20/18 10:37 AM
05/20/18 10:37 AM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,658
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,658
Alabama
Good morning all laugh

Got the dogs walked this morning and then cut the lawn...watering it now and cooling off inside. I've got gaming and sorting on the docket for my day yes

Sounds like a quiet day for you Ana

Can't wait to hear how your voice lesson went Venus think

Great news Gerry...I'll have a cup of coffee to go please

hearts L4L

Catch you all later

wave2


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: Joe's Super Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1151645
05/20/18 03:42 PM
05/20/18 03:42 PM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Hi all. I hope you're having a super day. I'm back to work in a few.

Midgie hearts wavegirl


Just do it.
Re: Joe's Super Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1151660
05/20/18 06:17 PM
05/20/18 06:17 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Soot, it went well, thanks. smile We're adding a new element and "color" to my voice now, so that's always a process. I figure the more versatile I can be, the better. grin Have fun gaming. woot What are you playing?


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Joe's Super Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1151690
05/20/18 09:20 PM
05/20/18 09:20 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
venus, glad you are learning new things!

Midgie, good to see you!

soot, it was a catch-up day for me. Getting there! Happy Gaming!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Joe's Super Sip and Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #1151711
05/20/18 11:33 PM
05/20/18 11:33 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Thanks, Ana. smile Hope your catch up day went well!

I'm off to sleep. Good night, everyone. sleep


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
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