“Break the ice in a crowded elevator by asking how much everyone weighs.”
–
Bill Murray
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Chuck Norris won't ever experience a heart attack – the heart is smarter than to even dream of attacking him.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t do push-ups. Chuck Norris pushes the Earth away from him.
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They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take c*rap from anybody.
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There are no steroids in baseball, only players Chuck Norris breathed on.
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When Chuck Norris breaks wind, a fly dies in Africa.
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Chuck Norris is so manly, even his chest hair has chest hair.
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If you seek a list of Chuck Norris' enemies, try checking the extinct species list.
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Mr. Norris once ate a whole cake before anybody could warn him that there was a stripper inside.
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Chuck Norris was once bitten by a black mamba. After three days of agony, the black mamba died.
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Why do children cry when they are born? They know they've entered a world with Chuck Norris in it
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Chuck Norris has his own joke category.
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The Apple customer support did as Chuck asked and speedily installed Android on his iPhone.
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The original plan was to put Chuck Norris’ face on Mount Rushmore, however the granite wasn’t tough enough for his beard.
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Chuck Norris only f*arts to kill.
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Chuck Noris died... but he's already feeling a lot better!
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Chuck Norris donates blood every month. Just not his own.
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There are 156 things in a room Chuck Norris could kill you with, the room itself included.
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Chuck Norris' fist is the reason the Smurfs are blue.
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In the Star Wars they always say “May the Force be with you.” They actually mean Chuck Norris.
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True Chuck Norris facts:
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Chuck Norris was born in 1940 but he looks at least 20 years younger.
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He is said to have some Cherokee roots.
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Chuck Norris wanted to become a police officer.
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His real name is Carlos Ray Norris Jr.
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He got his nick name "Chuck" from a friend in the military during his time in Korea.
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He was world champion in Karate.
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Chuck Norris has 5 kids.
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Chuck Norris did a roundhouse kick in every martial arts movie he made.
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He has a black belt in Tang Soo Do (10th degree) and black belt in Tae Kwon Do (8th degree). He was also the first Westerner in the history of Tae Kwon Do to have earned the 8th degree black belt.
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In younger days his favorite actor was John Wayne.
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His favorite joke is "Before the Boogie Man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris".
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And that concludes Chuck Norris............week.
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Good morning everyboomie.
Is it just me, or is that neon blue outline new??
I'm on the right web site aren't I?
It looks great!
Maybe I spent too much time in the sun today.
I don't think so but there's always tomorrow.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
acebook
witter
I have to make sure I get a lot of practice in, as I've fallen behind on that. Of course, I'll make sure to fit some gaming time in also. 
I am home for the weekend, I am fed for the evening, I am ready for some rest 
