“My girlfriend's dog died. So I got her an identical one. She was livid: ‘What I'm going to do with two dead dogs?’”

~Gary Delaney~
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Shower Thoughts


If you step on someone’s foot, they open their mouth – just like a garbage bin.

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Pregnant women are the only true body builders.

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Searching for a new laptop online is basically forcing your current computer to dig its own grave.

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What if the spider I killed in my bedroom lived his whole life thinking I was his roommate and died wondering what brought on this psychotic break?

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Why the hell is there an S in the word ‘lisp’?!

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There are two kinds of people. Some wash their dishes because they just ate; the others wash their dishes because they are just about to eat.

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My head is very slowly 3D printing my hair.

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Sweater is a pretty disgusting name for a piece of clothing.

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I and Bill Gates have a combined fortune of approximately 80 billion dollars.

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How does the non-stick coating stick to the pan?!I

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If you’re waiting to be served in a restaurant, shouldn’t you be called the waiter?

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It would be very nice if the car navigation voice would get more and more excited as you'd get closer to your destination.

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The goal of golf is to play as little golf as possible.

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Are those who sneeze the most blessed?

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If weights became invisible, a gym would turn into a slow motion disco.

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Is a paper cut the tree’s way of getting back at you?

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I wonder what dirty talk looks like in sign language.

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The devil shakes a pitchfork, the grim reaper swings a scythe… So is farming a big thing in the underworld?

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When a pregnant woman takes a bath, she’s become a human submarine.

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If snails are so slow, how come nobody sees them coming? It’s always like bam, there’s a snail.

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GOOD MORNING BOOMERLAND!!


It's Thursday?? Holy Hanna!


I was just getting used to Wednesday.


Now I have to start all over getting used to a new day. Will it ever end?


Wednesday was awesome, especially after the sun made it's appearance.


It was a bit nippy early on when we were at the park, but later it was perfect for walking.


This morning I'll be heading for the sod farm, and hoping it's not too soggy.


Ana I wasn't worried about walking in the mud, but I am NOT wanting to drive my truck through it.


Have a happy day everyone.


joe

Good Thumping Thursday morning everyone

Great shower thoughts Joe my head ran low on ink some years back

Good luck at the Sod Farm Joe

The coffee was great yesterday Gerry...I'll definitely take another today please...have a full day of digging out from under my desk today

L4L

Have a great day everyone

Joe, my poor SUV is so dirty right now! It's not black anymore.

I worked in the rain all day today, that's ok, Me and all the pups were still cheerful!

Have a happy day all! Another long day and then a easy one!

tomorrow i buy the meat for the stew and maybe mushroom, trail had a recipe on beef stew and pot roast thread, i am doing everything but the garlic, red wine, drac already made beef stew, oldbroad was doing some kind of pot roast.

Have a great Thursday Joe, soot, Ana, family and all who follow.

It's Wednesday night, and I'm off to sleep for another work day.

Have a great Thursday, everyone.

Good Morning Joe, soot, Ana, family, venus and everyone. Joe Good Luck at the sod farm! Soot fresh brewed strong coffee is ready and waiting for you! Ana have fun with all the pups today. Family mushrooms are very good in stew. Venus hope your work day is not to busy. Taintedfury enjoy your day! Coffee, tea and hot chocolate are ready.
Wishing you all a great day!

Good morning everyone, have a Great Thursday. L4L, we didn't get any effects from the hurricane. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, and Bacon in the NC.

“Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.”
― Ambrose Bierce, The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

Soooo....I've been absent from the Diner pretty much lately trying to rent out my empty nice 2 bed house that was vacated after 30 years. I thought I would catch you up on the process. Knew the people for all that time and miss them. Even more so, now that I've spent mega bucks getting the place up to code and back in move in condition. It will take about 6 months of the new rent to pay off all the stuff I had to buy. This isn't counting the 'labor' for me and my friend (other tenant). I'm paying him in free meals.

Tales from the Crypt time: So many people looking at the place is keeping me busy. So far in 2 1/2 weeks it's been about 60 or more 'browsers'. Another 40 or so contacted me on computer from the listing realty websites asking to see the place. Only about 2 of them, (yep, 2 of 40) actually showed up for the appointments! Total waste of time waiting around for them. A smattering have taken applications, only 2 have returned them. One was perfect but decided to wait 6 months before deciding to leave his apartment. Darn. Other one not good at all, didn't qualify on any level and it's sad because she was such a nice person.

Then...had a nice ex military, gainfully employed divorced man with an 11 year old son drop by. Nice people. Eager to rent. He came back the next night and I do mean NIGHT even though I specifically said not after 5 pm. But I showed the house again, this time with both his sons (the older one is 24). By the time I had finished chatting, it became obvious that not only 3 of them would be there, but the mother of the twins (the 24 year old's kids) and the twins would be there consistently all week every week. Only 3 or so days a week till 8 pm for the twins, and only 2-3 overnights. AND then the girlfriend would be there overnight on weekends for 'movie nights'. Now we count SIX pretty much living there, and I mentioned that I suspected it was going to be a short time till mom and the twins moved in all together. The facial expression from both of the adults confirmed my suspicions. Way too many people for a small 2 bedroom which I clearly said only 3 maximum which is what they assured me on day one. Around my area, it's common for a couple to rent and then move in several friends/relatives and think you won't notice.

If he comes back with the application (which he took on day one), I'm not accepting it. Not even going to let him think I'm considering it so he and I won't be wasting time and effort. Hate to do this, and family is nice, but can't handle 6 people coming and going and staying and... OH and I forgot to mention that the ex-wife of dad, comes over every morning to pick up the 11 year old and take him to school and returns him after school every day. So we now have 7 bodies in and out. Not going to work sadly for everyone. Hope the dad just doesn't come back, but if he does, it's going to be difficult for all of us. Sigh.

Good night, everyone.