If A is success in life, then A is equal to X plus Y plus Z. Work is X; Y is play; and Z - keeping your mouth shut.
~Albert Einstein~
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Lame One Liners | Part 2How many animals did Moses bring on his Ark?
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None! Moses didn’t have an Ark.
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Why are ghost such bad liars? Because they are easy to see through.
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I stole my friend’s wheelchair. Guess who is comes crawling back to me?!
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Man to his wife:
I would never say you’re fat! You’re just a bit more visible than you were last week .
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What would you call a person who had no body and no nose?
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Nobody knows.
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I saw this sweet poor old lady fall down the stairs and hurt herself. At least I assume she was poor because I didn’t find more than $3.50 in her wallet.
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Here, I bought you a calendar. Your days are numbered now.
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Where do fish sleep?
In the River Bed.
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Talk is cheap, yeah? Have you ever talked to a lawyer?!
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My wife’s driving test went surprisingly well yesterday. She got 7 out of 12. The 5 managed to run to safety.
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I called the hospital but the line was dead.
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Husband: Wow, honey, you look really different today. Did you do something to your hair?
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Wife: Michael, I’m over here!
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Do you know a tree’s favorite drink?
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Root beer!
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What did one plate say to his friend?
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Tonight, dinner’s on me!
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Two invisible men meet. One says to the other: “Hey dude, long time no see!”
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When everything’s coming your way – perhaps you’re in the wrong direction on the highway?
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A woman sees an angler at a lake, “Are they biting?”
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The angler replies, “Only if they are provoked.”
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Good morning lovers and girl friends.
My bad. I'm sorry, I am
so sorry!! Wrong site, wrong blog.
Good morning everyboomie.
Let's see, this is October the 32nd. Otherwise known as November the 1st.
I hope you all survived the night without any tricks.
The rain will take care of toilet paper in the trees, but eggs on the car is such a nightmare.
We didn't get any of the predicted storms last night. The rain didn't start here until 12:00, and it's been raining ever since.
Now I'm looking for a good day to head hunt. Looks like Friday will be partly sunny and 66.
I also need to check out the creek if it's not buried under leaves already.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe