GAMEBOOMERS provides you with all the latest PC adventure computer games information, forum, walkthroughs, reviews and news.

GB Reviews

Latest & Upcoming Adventure Games

GB Annual Game Lists

GB Interviews

BAAGS

GB @ acebook

About Us

Walkthroughs

free games galore

Game Publishers & Developers

World of Adventure

Patches

GB @ witter

GameBoomers Store

Print Thread
Happy Hump Day Diner #1174808
01/15/19 09:34 PM
01/15/19 09:34 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

—Steve Martin
`````````````


Two priests were determined to make this a real vacation by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy. As soon as the plane landed they headed for a store and bought some really outrageous shorts, shirts, sandals, sunglasses, etc.

The next morning they went to the beach dressed in their 'tourist' garb. They were sitting on beach chairs, enjoying a drink, the sunshine and the scenery when a 'drop dead gorgeous' topless blonde came walking straight towards them ...... They couldn't help but stare.

As the blonde passed them she smiled and said 'Good Morning, Father ~ Good Morning, Father,' nodding and addressing each of them individually, then she passed on by. They were both stunned. How in the world did she know they were priests? So the next day, they went back to the store and bought even more outrageous outfits.

Kathleen NunOnce again, in their new attire, they settled down in their chairs to enjoy the sunshine. After a little while, the same gorgeous topless blonde came walking toward them.

Again she nodded at each of them and said 'Good morning, Father ~ Good morning, Father,' and started to walk away.

One of the priests couldn't stand it any longer and said, 'Just a minute, young lady.' 'Yes, Father?'

'We are priests and proud of it, but I have to know, how in the world did you know we are priests, dressed as we are?'

She replied, 'Father, it's me, Sister Kathleen' ...

````

John, the vicar of St Mary's was enthused to raise money for his cathedral's roof. He felt the usual tombola would not make enough money so he decided to run a series of donkey Derbies throughout the diocese.

The Reverend John learned that Big Al Corleone had a string of donkeys, and persuaded him to loan his donkeys for a series of Derbies. Crucially, John induced Big Al to run the best donkey in the Vicar's name.

It the first Derby, held in the grounds of St Mark's church, John's donkey came second.

The next day the local chronicle carried this headline: "Vicar's Ass Shows."

Two weeks later the next donkey derby was run in St Gabriel's parish. John was thrilled when his donkey won!

The local paper read: "Vicar's Ass Out Front."

Problem: the bishop was so upset with the publicity generated by the Chronicle that he ordered the Vicar not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day, the local paper read: "Bishop Scratches Vicar's Ass".

Understandably, the bishop was exasperated and he ordered John to sever his association with the donkey Derby. Consequently, the Vicar decided to give the donkey to a nun in a St Cecilia's convent.

The local paper, hearing the news, posted this headline: "Nun Has Best Ass in Town."

When he read that headline the bishop fainted. Later, when he had recovered, the bishop summoned the nun and asked her to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for twenty dollars.

The next day's edition read: "Nun Sells Ass for $25."

Finally the bishop ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and to release it onto the plains where it could return to nature.

The next day the headlines read: "Nun Announces that Her Ass is Wild and Free".

The bishop was buried the next day.

````

A priest and a taxi driver both died and went to heaven. St Christopher was at the Pearly gates waiting for them.

The taxi driver did as he was told and followed St Christopher to a mansion. It had everything you could imagine from a bowling alley to an Olympic size pool.

'Oh my word, thank you,' said the taxi driver.

Next, St Christopher led the priest to a rough old shack with a bunk bed and a little old television set.

'Wait, I think you are a little mixed up,' said the priest. 'Shouldn't I be the one who gets the mansion? After all I was a priest, went to church every day, and preached God's word.'

'Yes, that's true.' St Christopher rejoined, 'But during your sermons people slept. When the taxi driver drove, everyone prayed.'

````

A man flops down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie is stained, his face is smeared with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin is sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opens a newspaper and begins reading.

After a few minutes the guy turns to the priest and asks, 'Say, Father, what causes arthritis?' Loose living; cheap, wicked woman; too much alcohol; and contempt for your fellow man, 'answers the priest.' I'll be damned, 'the drunk mutters, returning to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he said, nudges the man and apologises.' I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to be so harsh. How long have you had arthritis?'

'Oh, I don't have it, Father. But it says here that the Pope does.'

````

Holy Smoke

Acting on a tip-off, Greek police officers raided a nunnery in the village of Filiro, near Thessaloniki in Greece. It amazed them to find 35 healthy cannabis plants growing in the walled garden.

What the nuns told the police was, two gentleman offered to help them tidy the garden in the Greek Orthodox nunnery. Summing up the circumstances, the officers believed the nuns when they said they had no idea that 'decorative plants' were really pot, or kánnabis in Greek. Police are still trying to trace the two gardeners.

````

A Woman Should Have .....

Enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to...A Woman Should Have....

A Woman Should Have ......


Something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...

A Woman Should Have .....

A youth she's content to leave behind....

A Woman Should Have ......

A past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age....

A Woman Should Have .......


A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...

A Woman Should Have ......

One friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry...

A Woman Should Have ......

A good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family...

A Woman Should Have ......


Eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honoured...

A Woman Should Have ......

A feeling of control over her destiny.

Every Woman Should Know .....

How to fall in love without losing herself.

Every Woman Should Know .....

How to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship...

Every Woman Should Know .....

When to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY...

Every Woman Should Know .....

That she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..

Every Woman Should Know .....

That her childhood may not have been perfect...but its over...

Every Woman Should Know .....

What she would and wouldn't do for love or more...

Every Woman Should Know .....


How to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...
Every Woman Should Know .....

Whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally.. ..

Every Woman Should Know .....

Where to go, be it to her best friend's kitchen table, or a charming inn in the woods; when her soul needs soothing...

Every Woman Should Know .....


What she can and can't accomplish in a day...a month...and a year...

````

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


Hump day already? Hold on tight everyone, it's straight down hill from here. hamster


I think I'll take the easy way down.


It's ok to end the week with a bang, but not a crash. razz


If you happen to hear a bang though don't worry, it's just me shooting holes in the clouds to let some sunshine in.


The weatherman lied again. Last night they said 61 degrees today. Then this morning they said 48 for the high. slapforehead


We didn't go to Sam's. My friend had repairmen call and say they would be coming to her house, so we will go down there Wed. Then after cancelling our plans for the day, they didn't show up at her house. hardwall


They told her they would be there Wednesday instead, and she said "Oh No, you won't!" shame


The good news is, the weather man say's we'll be 61 degrees for the high on Wednesday. Here we go again. rolleyes


Have a happy day everyone. thumbsup


joe

Last edited by gymcandy1; 01/15/19 09:58 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Happy Hump Day Diner [Re: gymcandy1] #1174810
01/15/19 10:17 PM
01/15/19 10:17 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Online content
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Online Content
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
lol It sounds like ground hog day the movie, Joe! I hope that your plans don't fall through and the weather cooperates!

Looooooong day for me today. This too shall pass!

Have a great one!
Ana


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Happy Hump Day Diner [Re: gymcandy1] #1174811
01/15/19 10:38 PM
01/15/19 10:38 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
That is so wrong when they do that Joe...hope your day took a turn for the better!

Hump Day Boomers!

Wishing you the best one possible Joe and Ana.

Have a good one everyone

L4L hearts

wave2


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: Happy Hump Day Diner [Re: gymcandy1] #1174829
01/16/19 06:07 AM
01/16/19 06:07 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana, soot and everyone. Joe hope you get to make your trip to Sam's today. Ana sounds like another busy day for you. Soot enjoy your day and your fresh coffee too. Coffee, tea, and hot chocolate are ready.
happydance12 Wishing you all a Happy Day! happydance12


Gerry
Re: Happy Hump Day Diner [Re: gymcandy1] #1174837
01/16/19 08:53 AM
01/16/19 08:53 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Joe, that situation with the repairmen is very frustrating. crazy Hope the weather prediction is right this time!

Hope your long day isn't too painful, Ana!

Have a terrific day, soot.

Have a happy day as well, Gerry. happydance12

I wanted to post quickly this morning, as I forgot to last night. My day was disrupted in a way, as I went to meet the volunteer at the store to see about adopting Isis. happydance12 The process is a little different than what I'm used to, as they actually like to come out to your home and check out the space you have prepared for the cat. The lady that I met with was very nice. She said she would have gone last night, but she had another appointment, so someone else is going to bring Isis over on Thursday evening. So on Thursday, I should have my new kitty. woot

And now I have to run to work. wave

Have a great Wednesday, everyone. winter


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Happy Hump Day Diner [Re: gymcandy1] #1174847
01/16/19 09:15 AM
01/16/19 09:15 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Wonderful Hump Day. Venus, enjoy your new kitty, pictures please. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Bacon, and French Toast in the NC. winter


Connie
Re: Happy Hump Day Diner [Re: gymcandy1] #1174862
01/16/19 12:47 PM
01/16/19 12:47 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Happy Hump Day ya'll puppy

Sunny day in CO. Little Levi likes to sleep all day and stay up all night. We are breaking my cardinal rule and waking him up today so he can nurse. Needs to gain back some weight, but doing really well otherwise.

Congratulations, Venus, on your new baby.

Have a great one wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Happy Hump Day Diner [Re: gymcandy1] #1174902
01/16/19 09:59 PM
01/16/19 09:59 PM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 7,402
marietta,georgia
family Offline
BAAG Specialist
family  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 7,402
marietta,georgia
same as tuesday.

Previous Thread
Index
Next Thread

Moderated by  BrownEyedTigre 

Who's Online Now
2 registered members (BrownEyedTigre, flotsam), 250 guests, and 0 spiders.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Staff, Mod
Newest Members
PierreLombardo, Dux, WillPowerGoat, Ebalon, J7769mon
9388 Registered Users
Powered by UBB.threads™