>REM I guess it's an animated gif Becky.

REMARK made.

>_



Bernard

Talk to lantern.

The lantern flap opens magically. A voice emerges that sounds like a combination of Peter Lorre and Daffy Duck.

"I am NOT a Standard Oil lamp!" says the voice. "Nor am I named after any other business enterprise. Are you TRYING to be insulting?"

>Apologize to lantern.

"Sincere apologies, oh sentient lantern," you say, bowing hastily. "It won't happen again. Err, do you know anything about how yonder skeleton met its sad demise?"

"The place is thick with grues," murmurs the lantern. "And I see someone's been slaying turkeys too. I have many friends who are turkeys. I hope you are sensible enough to have something murderous in your inventory to slay the turkey-killer."

>_ (Tempted to pirate animated gif.)

> I thought I was sensible enough to have something in my inventory but all I have is my wig - I don't mind the ringlets so much but oh pleease - the big pink bow! Nearly all my inventory was thrown down a well a few pages ago I CAN'T PLAY ANYMORE WITHOUT LOTS OF INVENTORY So before I go slay the turkey killer I'm going to collect a few - no, make that lots of things first if you don't mind.
> Look around see small shard of flint - pick it up. Is that a set of ladders over there - yep! I'll have those - pick-up ladders..................

EDIT I have a bow.

REM Feel free to use THIS one Becky!


REMARK made.

> inv

You are carrying 4 item(s):

An empty bucket, a wig, a shard of flint and ladders.





Bernard

>REM Given that the gif is all of .11KB, I don't think I mind if people steal it from me...

REMARK made.

> Pick up lantern

You pick up the lantern you dropped a short time ago for no apparent reason. The lantern grumbles noisily. It's still short on fuel.

> Use flint on lantern

You send random sparks flying into the lantern, but with no oil to light the effort is useless.

You hear something approaching through the shrubbery.

> Throw ladder at shrubbery

You throw the ladders in the general direction of the noise and are gratified to hear a loud thump followed by someone shouting "Ow!"

A moment later you are startled to see an exact duplicate of yourself stumble out of the shrubbery, wearing a ladder and a wig. Your double stops in front of you and hands you a dusty bottle containing a small amount of olive oil. "You're going to need this," your double says. You watch in gratified confusion as your twin wanders off to the West.

>put olive oil in lantern

Um. Okay.

>Light lamp with flint

Olive oil makes a lousy lantern fuel.

>Light lamp with flint or I'll strangle you.

Fortunately for you the lantern is a sentient magic lamp and instantly lights with a strong, steady flame. In the light of the lantern you can now see a path, heading east.

>E

You walk East and are surprised to find yourself standing next to a strangely familiar well. The path continues to the East.

>Save game

Game Saved.

>Look at well

You can't see much, it's too dark.

>Use lantern on well

You throw the lit lantern down the well. You hear a disappointing splash as the lantern hits bottom and goes out. Congratulations.

>Load Game

Are you sure? Y/N

>Y

Game Loaded. You are standing next to a strangely familiar well. A path leads to the east and west.

>Use lantern to light well

You hold the lantern over the well and look down. The well is about four feet deep. At the bottom you see a pile of stuff. In one corner stands a beautiful woman holding a gold credit card.

>Take stuff

Most of this stuff is useless, but you decide to take a pocket sword, 3 cents, a gun with 2 bullets remaining, a dusty bottle containing a small amount of olive oil, a clipper lighter, and a moldy piece of brie.

Delete, delete, delete...

>East

You're at the edge of a cliff. Three yards beneath you, you see a bird's nest with some eggs in it. Those eggs may come in handy! There are some long roots of a tree growing down the edge. You can go west or down.

>use roots to climb down

You climb down the roots until you reach the nest.

>take eggs

When you stretch out your hand to get the eggs, you here a flapping sound. A gigantic bird nears you..!




Bernard

You have on instant idea... "I'll play dead like possums do" and with a little hop you fall down facing the sky... The bird starts thinking that she scares you do death... No food tonight...

You stand up, the bird sees you. It's turning and flies towards you again.




Bernard

You put on the wig with the large pink bow - the bird laughs so much it gets hiccups and floats away. Pick up egg.
Continue down the roots-

You climb down the roots further. You're at the entrance of a cave.

>enter cave

The cave looks like someone lived in here a very long time ago. There's some painting equipment here and a musical instrument.

>use egg with painting equipment

You paint the egg with the old paint pigments. You have an Easter egg now!

>play instrument

You play "Here Comes the Bride" on the old xylophone. You're baffled because nobody appears!!!

Nothing else can be done here, so you leave the cave and climb up the roots until you reach the edge of the cliff.
Exits are to the West and Down.




Bernard

>go West

You go West. Suddenly you hear an almighty kerfuffle behind you. You turn around cautiously. A female grue in a wedding dress is charging in your direction. Meet your new wife.

>No way!!

Yes way.

>throw Easter egg at grue

That's not very friendly, but ok. You throw the Easter egg at the grue in white. It hits her on the forehead, splatters and covers her with yolk. I hope you're satisfied.

>run run run

You run run run until you reach a crossroads. Four paths leading to who knows where. Vultures circle overhead. Flower blossoms wave gently in the warm breeze. Where to now?

>_

West.

You turn west and run down a path between meadows full of clover. Bees buzz around you. Just as you are feeling safe, over a rise comes a middled-aged grue carrying a shotgun. Your future father-in-law! You barely have time to wonder why grues are no longer afraid of sunlight as you turn and run back to the crossroads.

>_