"Angels around us, angels beside us, angels within us. Angels are watching over you when times are good or stressed. Their wings wrap gently around you, whispering you are loved and blessed."
Angel Blessing
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One afternoon while doing some work in the garden I noticed my dog dragging something under the fence. Upon inspection, to my dismay, I realized it was the next door neighbour's daughter's rabbit. For years I had watch her come home from school and head straight out to its cage, free it and play with it in the garden. I knew today would be no different and fearing for our dog, I had to think fast.
The rabbit was quite dirty, as if it had put up quite a struggle, so I washed it off with the hose, combed it with the dog brush and blew it dry with the leaf blower. Upon finishing its grooming, I jumped the fence and replaced it back in its cage hoping its death would be written off as "natural causes". Within the hour, the neighbour's car pulled in and out popped the little girl, and as usual she headed straight for the cage. Only this time she stopped about six feet away and screamed "DDDDDAAAADDDDDDDYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Her father, panic stricken, stood looking at the cage. Being the good neighbour that I am, I rushed to fence and asked if there was anything I could do.
Her father less than calmly blurted, "What kind of sick individual would dig up a little girl's dead rabbit and put it back in it's cage?"
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The Scene: The Pearly Gates to Heaven. St Peter is receptionist at the entrance. - A cat shows up.
St Peter says "I know you! You were a very nice cat on earth and didn't cause any trouble, so I want to offer a gift to you of one special thing you have always wanted."
Cat: "Well, I did always long to own a nice satin pillow like my master had, so I could lie on it."
St Peter: "That's easy. Granted. You shall have the satin pillow after you enter in."
Next a group of mice appeared.
St Peter: "Ah, I remember you. You were such good mice on earth. You didn't steal food from anyone's house and never hurt other animals. Therefore, I want to grant you one special wish you always wanted."
The Chief Mouse replied, "Well, we always watched the children playing and saw them roller skate, and it was beautiful, and it looked like so much fun. So can we each have some roller skates, please?"
St Peter: "Granted. You shall have your wish."
Next day, St Peter is making the rounds inside the Gates, and sees the cat.
"Well, Cat...Did you enjoy the satin pillow?"
Cat: "Oh, indeed I did. And say...that "Meals on Wheels" thing was a nice touch, too!"
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Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the big table he looks into his small bowl. It is empty. "Who's been eating my porridge?" he squeaks.
Papa Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl, and it is also empty. "Who's been eating my Porridge?" he roars.
Momma Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells, "For God's sake, how many times do we have to go through this? It was Momma Bear who got up first, it was Momma Bear who woke everyone in the house, it was Momma Bear who made the coffee, it was Momma Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night, and put everything away, it was Momma Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the newspaper, it was Momma Bear who set the table, it was Momma Bear who put the cat out, cleaned the litter box, and filled the cat's water and food dish, and, now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-butts downstairs, and grace Momma Bear's kitchen with your grumpy presence.....listen good, cause I'm only going to say this one more time
"I HAVEN'T MADE THE PORRIDGE YET!!!"
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A man was sitting at home one evening, when the doorbell rang. When he answered the door, a 6 foot tall cockroach was standing there. The cockroach immediately punched him between the eyes and scampered off.
The next evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell rang again. When he answered the door, the cockroach was there again. This time, it punched him, kicked him and karate chopped him before running away.
The third evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell rang. When he answered the door, the cockroach was there yet again. It leapt at him and stabbed him several times before running off. The gravely injured man managed to crawl to the telephone and summoned an ambulance. He was rushed to intensive care, where they saved his life. The next morning, the doctor was doing his rounds. He asked the man what happened, so the man explained about the 6 foot cockroach's attacks, culminating in the near fatal stabbing.
The doctor thought for a moment and said, "Yes, there's a nasty bug going around."
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I was driving along the highway, and saw a rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. I swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of the car and was hit. Being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, I pulled over to the side of the road and got out to see what had became of the rabbit. Much to my dismay, the rabbit was dead. I felt so awful I began to cry.
A woman driving down the highway saw me crying on the side of the road so she pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked me what was wrong.
"I feel terrible," I explained. "I accidently hit this rabbit and killed it."
The woman told me not to worry. She knew what to do. She went to her car trunk and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the limp, dead rabbit, and sprayed the contents of the can onto the rabbit.
Miraculously, the rabbit came to life, jumped up, waved his paw at us and hopped down the road. Fifty feet away the rabbit stopped, turned around, waved at us again, hopped down the road another 50 feet, turned, waved and hopped another 50 feet.
I tell you, I was flabbergasted. I couldn't figure out what was in the woman's spray can. So I ran over to her and asked, "What was in your spray can? What did you spray onto the rabbit?"
The woman turned the can around so I could read it. It said:
"Hare Spray - Restores life to dead hare - Adds permanent wave"
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Good morning everyboomie.
Sorry for not waving. My arms are sure sore, so I shant wave them for a while.
Now if I could just stop using the rest of my body.
Three days back at work will give me time to recoup.
So Friday for you is Monday for me. Woo Hoo....
Wait a minute!.....
....I think I'm not supposed to be happy about that.
That doesn't mean that you can't have a happy day, eh?
SO!....uhm....Have a happy day?
joe
acebook
on getting the black and white dog beds!
To all awake, 
Pumpkin bread,and Donut holes in the NC,enjoy your Friday all 
Ana go for the doggy beds! 
Cailyn hope you have a nice day. 
I can't beleive people really spend that kind of money, but Tammy Faye had A/C in a dog house for her pets. 
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