There are only two things a child will share willingly -- communicable diseases and his mother's age.
Benjamin Spock
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Two redneck guys go on a fishing trip.

They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods.

They spend a fortune.

The first day they go fishing, but they don't catch anything.

The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day.

It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men catches a fish.

As they're driving home they're really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, "Do you realize that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred dollars?"

The other guy says, "Wow! It's a good thing we didn't catch any more!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You know you're a redneck jedi when..

You hear "Luke, I am your father... and your uncle..."

You ever said the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."

Your Jedi robe is camouflage.

You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud Light.

At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored.

You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.

You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard.

The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.

Wookiees are offended by your B.O.

You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.

You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing or bowling.

You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light up.

You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder.

You ever fantasized about Princess Leia wearing Daisy Duke shorts.

You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and you have to get in through the window.

Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.

You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with redwood deck.

You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels during the cantina scene.

Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over to the dark side...it'll be a hoot."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two rednecks decided that they weren't going anywhere in life and thought they should go to college to get ahead.

The first went in to see the counselor, who told him to take math, history, and logic.

"What's logic?" the first redneck asked.

The professor answered, "Let me give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?"

"I sure do."

"Then I can assume, using logic, that you have a yard," replied the professor.

"That's real good!" said the redneck.

The professor continued, "Logic will also tell me that since you have a yard, you also own a house."

Impressed, the redneck said, "Amazing!"

"And since you own a house, logic dictates that you have a wife."

"That's Betty Mae! This is incredible!"

The redneck was catching on.

"Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can assume that you are heterosexual," said the professor.

"You're absolutely right! Why that's the most fascinatin' thing I ever heard! I cain't wait to take that logic class!"

The redneck, proud of the new world opening up to him, walked back into the hallway where his friend was still waiting.

"So what classes are ya takin'?" asked the friend.

"Math, history, and logic!" replied the first redneck.

"What in tarnation is logic?" asked his friend.

"Let me give you an example. Do ya own a weed eater?" asked the first redneck.

"No," his friend replied.

"You ain't got no wife do you?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie.

Moving right along. I have one down & two to go, and then.............A WEEK OFF!

I work a mid shift today, and then an early day tomorrow. Perfect!

I'm so hoppy. No wait, it's not Easter yet.

My cup runneth over with exuberance.

You may address me as Joseph Shakespear now.

Romeo Romeo, where for art thou to be, or not to be.

I shall now endeth my postulations, and bid thee all a day that shall set on thy shoulders as a butterfly on the Lilys of the field.

joe

Heyyyy Boom Boom buddies~

hey ya joe! you trying to confuse me with the
days wellll.... its working
sooo its Friday right1


Hi Trippy WOW! your getting dumped on too!
Eastern Wash always get wayyy more snow then
the Coasties~ Do you snowmobile?

Hi Sorta Your sister is lucky to be down their with you
Omak gets lots of snow! I miss living in Eastern Wash
so much Does she watch the Omak stampeed
every year/


l4L how is lil soot healing/? did you try wrapping an
ace bandage around his tummy to keep the pressure
patch on? my niece's little dog Buddy has to be put
down his back went out and he's 15yr. Rikki has had
him since she was 2 its so hard

Gail what back porch???

Hey ya Nan Whoaaa busted pipes water froze
been their that sucks! hope it warms up fast!
are you pipes wrapped?
I bet Miss Sassy doesn't like that cold much huh?
bella went running out the door and the snow was wayyy
over her hear!! all you could see was the snow moving
she made a big circleand came ripping back in!

have a nice day everyone~Karen~

Kalimera(good morning),I hope
you have a wonderfull day

Good Morning Joe, Karen, Haroula and Cailyn too! Hope it's a great day for everyone!

Good morning. We're back in the teens this morning and I think we're finally gonna get some snow tonight. Don't know how much yet. I don't think it'll be much. Thanks Joe for your funny openers and comments. Morning Karen. I'd've loved to see Miss Bella running under the snow. Hi Haroula, Gerry, and everyone who comes in after me. I have work this morning and then later on tonight. Won't be bad. Have a good day all. Exercise please. Morning Ana when you come in.

Midgie

Good Morning boomers

Joe, enjoy your day. Thanks for the laughs.

Karen, wishing you a great day. Talk to you when you get up.

Haroula, Kalimera!

Cailyn, hope you're3 feeling okay this morning.

Gerry, good day to you also.

Midgie, some snow tonight and more snow for saturday on the way.

Ana, did you get a chance to sleep in this morning?

To all who come into the Diner I'm wishing a wonderful day! Coffee awaits everyone's arrival! Tea available also.

Good morning everyone. Karen, hugs for your niece. They changed hubby's Dr. appointment to early tomorrow morning, instead of in the afternoon. I'm worried he is coming down with something. He says no, but we will see tomorrow. He's coughing and not sleeping well. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Thursday. Danish and Bear Claws in the NC.

Connie, I know the worrying has got to be hard on you. Hugs to both of you.

Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Have a tremendous TGIT!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies! If I may borrow Joe's wonderful words, it's IshallnowendethmypostulationsandbidtheealladaythatshallsetonthyshouldersasabutterflyontheLilysofthefield TGIT!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!

Well that is the sum of today!!! It was -12 when me and Sassy breezed out and blew in this morning and now it is -15. I see the water people doing something with the firehydrants, like making them run and icing the roads.

Joe thanks for the chuckles this morning. A whole week off??? What ya gonna do with all that free time??? Have a nice day!

Karen no worries here about busted pipes as I am in an apartment now. I mean, they could break but I don't have to worry about it. Bella sounds too funny, just like Sassy.

Haroula hope it has warmed a little there for ya. Have a lovely day!

Gerry have a lovely day!

Midge a little snow is OK so enjoy it well you can. Have a fun time at work!

Gail thanks for the hot coffee......always good on a cold morning. Any fun plans today? Have a lovely day!

Connie HUGS to you both! Prayers that hubby is alright. At least with the new morning appointment you don't have to wait all day to see the doc. Have a lovely day!

No plans here but to stay in and stay warm. Have a wonderful day everybody!!


Nan

Good morning everybody.

This is a quick Hi & By. I'm on my way out the door.

I hope you all have a super day & I'll see you after 7:00 tonight.

joe

Anyone heard from Venus?

I can be found hiding in the corner today. I am not in the best of moods. My trucks repair costs have exceeded it's value so I won't be fixing it this time. Now I have to ponder which bank I'll be robbing to get a cheap replacement. I am a very unhappy camper....

Thumping Good Thursday ya'll

It's cold out there....well, at least to my Alabama blood it is cold out there. I'll take Lil Soot for a potty walk once it warms up. Thanks to daughter I Think we have gotten him bound well enough to keep pressure on the hemotoma. Poor baby looks like a mummy. I'll get hubby to take a picture.

Boys are here and son is still down and out and living in Sickville so I'm busy. Cully met me as I was coming out of my bedroom with a request for Big Soot. I told him Soot was at work so his next words were "I want biscuits." He loves biscuits.

My back is screaming very uncouth things at me so if Son gets to feeling better, I will pass the Kid Baton to him and retire to my room with a heating pad. If not, I'll hang til Big Soot gets here.

Joe, you are such a hoot!

Doc, I'm so sorry to hear about Buddy...it's sooooo hard to loose a 4-legged one. We've had Lil Soot wrapped every concieveable way. The problem is the incision is right where his ribs meet his waist. So everytime he breathes or shakes he moves it a bit. We can't wrap it too tightly or he can't breathe.

So glad no one was on the porch when the snow came cascading down.

Haroula, Kalimera

Gerry

Midgy, how you doing? Have you given up on finding a new place to live?

Gail, coffee by the gallon please! Have a great day.

Connie, hugs and prayers for you both.

Darlene, happy skooshing.

Nan, eeek eeeeek and triple eeeeeek! Why are they purposely icing the roads?

Awwww Ana, that stinks.

Happy day before Friday to all.

I'm still 'full' from yesterday's surprise visit from my sister and niece and lunch and that yummy Danish pastry from the little shop I never knew existed. Oh to die for! Now I'm going to have to go there frequently for more goodies.

Just got my gas/electric bill for Dec-Jan. Ugh ugh ugh! My gas usage for the heater (which I neeeed) jumped it up 15 bucks and that's WITH my low income discount. Wow. However, it's right in line with last year's usage so I'm not feeling too bad and definitely not going to turn off the heat.

Sister from Washington, got an emergency call from her tenants. Their car was in the garage and the door opener wasn't working. Solution is to open the side door and push the button inside. They tried, but the key wouldn't turn. So finally they got a hairdryer and melted all the ICE from inside the lock and voila, car out. Handyman was called to WD40 it all so it wouldn't refreeze. I am sooooo happy to live here and not where it freezes!

Washing towels that I brought in from my storage shed. Pared down my 'stash' so that all fit in one cupboard (as they should) and am washing the 'shed' ones to be sure they didn't grow any strange entities while out there for several years. Creepy thoughts of entire microscopic civilizations living on my towels.

It is snowing here Boomers.