Leeana,
My mother committed suicide. I loved her very much and never blamed her for being unable to go on after years of constant, often terrible pain, but it hit me so hard. I have a fairly good idea of the grief you and your daughter are going through and while I'm not much on prayer, if hopes and wishes for you to find peace will do it, you've got them.
Gil.
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My scythe... I like to keep it close to where my heart used to be.