A good sermon should be like a woman's skirt: short enough to rouse the interest, but long enough to cover the essentials.
Ronald Knox
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Little Willie asked his mother: "Mamma, don't soldiers ever go to heaven?"
"Of course they do!" protested his mother. "What makes you ask?"
"There are so many soldiers with beards but I never saw any pictures of angels with beards."
"Oh, that's because most men who go to Heaven get there by a close shave."
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A lawyer was trying to console a weeping widow. Her husband had passed away without a will.

"Did the deceased have any last words?" asked the lawyer.

"You mean right before he died?" sobbed the window.

"Yes," replied the lawyer, "they might be helpful if it's not too painful for you to recall."

"Well," she began, "he said 'Don't try to scare me. You couldn't hit the broad side of a barn with that gun.'"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Mozart passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Mozart was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave.
Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate. When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Mozart's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards."
He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony, and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling." So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh...the Sixth...the Fifth..." Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry about. It's just Mozart decomposing."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie.

I am so about to pass out.

Maybe because I've been up since 3:30am.

I've been trying to get here for the last hour.

It's like I was knocking on the Gameboomer door and no one would answer.

That really hurts because it brings to mind when that has happened to me before.

I have to beat on the door every day and beg Mom to let me stay here one more night.

Have a happy day everyone.

joe

Good morning Joe
Good morning boomers
Today is hot but windy.
My son bring me some roses (with dad's help)
for mother's day
Have all a lovely day

Good morning Joe,Haroula,and all who arrive later Roses Haroula very nice,coffee in the corner enjoy the day all

I hope you had a nice Mother's Day Haroula.

Good morning and have a great day Joe, Haroula, Cailyn, curly and all who com in after me.

So tired this morning! I worked longer hours than expected yesterday because the project we had to do was huge, and I'm still feeling it today. Looking forward to my day off already.

As for now, must whoosh off to work.

Hope everyone has a terrific day.

Good morning everyone. Hubby sees the Dr. this afternoon. If all is well, he doesn't have to have any more scans or visits to the hospital for 3 months. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Tuesday. Danish and Bear claws in the NC.

Good Morning Boomers

Joe, you are soooo funny.

Haroula, enjoy your beautiful flowers.

Cailyn, Coffee please!

Curly, glad you joined us this morning.

Venus, hope the time passes quickly for you.

Connie, well-wishing vibes sent out your way for hubby. Danish? yay!

Happy day to all who come into the Diner today!

Nothing in particular to do today. Think I'll make it a gaming day!

Good morning. Thanks Joe for getting in the diner door. We would be lost without you. Morning Haroula, Sue, Curly, Venus, Connie, Gail, and all who come through the door today. I have laundry and a few errands to do today, work later on. Not a bad day. Oh, and it'll be raining later on. Have a great Tuesday everyone. Be good.

Midgie

Good morning boomies! Flying by for now. I have to go drop Peter off at court to meet with his attorney (he can't drive there because he lost his ticket ) and then go to the chiropractor and then go pick up Peter. All of this is about 50 miles of driving.

Gerry, I hope you are okay.

L4L, good luck at the dentist!

Joe, thanks for opening!

Nan, I hope the doctor appts go well for all.

Connie, good luck for hubby!

ack....late, gotta run!

HUgs to all....

Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Are you at work today! Hope wherever you are, your day is great!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!

Joe thanks for the laughs!! May work fly and the mowers sell!

Haroula how lovely to receive those roses from your son!! Have a lovely day!

Cailyn have a lovely day. Are ya ready for the campers???

Gerry hope al is well. HUGS!!

venus may work fly and your energy come back!! Have a good day!

Midge have fun with the laundry! May work be fun.

Gail a gaming day sounds like just the ticket.....enjoy!!

Connie prayers that all is well and hubby doesn't have to return for three months. Thanks for the danish!

Ana always something going on to keep ya on the go. Have a lovely day and a fun park run!

Darlene may work fly and everything go smoothly!!


Nan

Apartment News! Last night, 3 police cars showed up. One, then two with officers going 'in' to somewhere in the maze of rooms. No lights no noise. THEN one of the cars left after about an hour and I saw the other guy opening his trunk and messing around, etc. and going back towards the Apartments. THEN I heard loud male voices, and the car that left came back with lights and 'whoops' on the siren. THEN there were several police holding a guy near that car, hands behind his back, and THEN he struggled and attempted to get back towards the Apartments and was yelling 'Monique'! THEN the 'lighted' car pulled off after a few minutes and I saw that there had been a 4th car parked IN the front spot of the place. I am assuming that the guy was arrested since all was quiet after that. Whew! Ya never know what went on. Couldn't stand out front gawking long enough to actually catch all the action, but I'm assuming domestic violence. The guy they took away is one of the guys who owns that 'not so tame' dog that I'm deathly afraid of. I'll ask around today if I see anyone who might know what happened. It was loud enough that everyone living there should have heard the commotion. AND at the same time as all this started, we had our police helicopter flying over with a message to call 911 if we saw a male, white t-shirt, windbreaker, shorts, carrying a small gray metal box. Well guess who was wearing just that clothing? The guy the took away. Dunno if it was him but the helicopter left right after I saw the police with the guy in handcuffs. Coincidence? There have been several armed robberies of small businesses in a 3-4 block area around here in the past few weeks. Always the same description of 'suspects' who sound strangely like the Apartment 'gang' who hangs out front all the time selling drugs. And they always leave 'on foot' no cars seen. Hummmmm.

Terrific Tuesday ya'll

I was up and out the door to the dentist first thing. I hate going to the dentist so had put it off for 2 years. Oh well....

I survived...my face is numb, and I have to go back next week. They wanted me to come in tomorrow but we'll have the boys Wed-Mon. I had to laugh when I told the receptionist I couldn't come in tomorrow cos I had the kids Wed-Mon. She said "Oh, ok, then you will need Tuesday to recuperate."

Then on to Best Buy to pick up Diablo III. I felt like I needed to keep saying.."I'm not drunk...I just left the dentist" each time I had to talk to anyone. But, I made myself understood, got son's game, and made it home to very carefully eat breakfast/lunch. I'd like to go walking but my mouth is too numb to risk chewing gum and my mouth is too dry to walk without it.

Mine and hubby's games came a few minutes ago, so once I hear from VA son, we will all be Diablo'd. We won't get much playing done today though...we have Bible Study tonight and it will be too late after we get home.

Haroula, how sweet of both hubby and son.

Cailyn, what's up with you today?

Curly, how's life?

Venus, when is your next day off?

Connie, for this afternoon.

Gail, have fun.

Midgy, enjoy the rain. I think our rain chances are supposed to start increasing tomorrow and continue to do so throughout the weekend.

Ana, eek....not fun...hope the chiropractor visit is wonderful!

Darlene, happy skooshing!

Nan, whatcha up to today?

Sorta, You stay safe.

edit: Where is Gerry?

Good night Haroula, sleep well