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#838830 - 09/28/12 12:05 AM TGIF
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30107
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
It is not a bad idea to get in the habit of writing down one's thoughts. It saves one having to bother anyone else with them.
Isabel Colegate
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Things You Learn in Texas

Armadillos sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.

There are 5,000 types of snakes on earth and 4,998 live in Texas.

There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Texas plus a couple that have not been identified yet.

Onced and Twiced are words.

It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy.

People actually grow and eat okra.

"Fixinto" is one word.

There is no such thing as "lunch." There is only dinner and then there is supper.

Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar!

DJeet? means "Did you eat?"

You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is. You work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

You measure distance in minutes.

You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.

All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.

You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip and sports.

The first day of deer season is a national holiday.

100 degrees Fahrenheit "a little warm." We have four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, still Summer and Christmas.

A cool snap (below 70 degrees) is good pinto-bean weather.

We don't need no stinking driver's Ed . . . If our mama says we can drive, we can drive.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


A Cuban, a Scot, a Spaniard, and an Irishman are sharing a carriage on a train to Belfast.

The Cuban lights up this enormous Cuban cigar, takes one short drag from it and flings the cigar out the window.

The other three look at him in amazement and ask why he just threw out a full Cuban cigar.

He says, "I'm from Cuba, we have thousands of those things back home."

The Scot pulls out a litre bottle of Bells Whiskey, a 50 year-old bottle, takes a short measure glass, half fills it, knocks it back and flings the remainder of the bottle out the window.

The other three are in shock, ask him why he just threw away a near full bottle of fine malt Scottish whiskey??!!

He replies, "I'm Scottish, we have thousands of those things at home."

The Spaniard pulls out a flagon of red wine, a 100 year-old classic. He takes a couple of sips, licks his lips, and flings the remainder of the wine out the window.

The other three ask him why he just threw away a near full bottle of classic wine, he replies, "I'm Spanish, I have thousands of those things back home."

The Irish then grabs the Spaniard and throws him out of the window.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Racehorse doping is not unknown in Ireland.

One day, the Clerk of the Course spotted a trainer giving something to a horse just before the start of a race.

He went over and said, "Doping?"

The trainer said, "Indeed not, Sor.

'Tis just lump sugar. Look, I'll take a bit meself.. see?"

The Clerk of the Course said,

"Sorry, but we have to be careful. As a matter of fact, I like a bit of sugar meself."

So the trainer gave him a piece.

When the Clerk of the Course disappeared, the trainer gave his jockey his last minute instructions,

"Don't forget the drill.

Hold him in 'til the last four furlongs.

Don't worry if anything passes ye, it'll be me or the Clerk of the Course!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Swede was in a pub in Finland and a regular customer suggested to him:

"I'll give you $200, if you let me smash ten beer bottles on your head."

The Swede thought for a while and finally agreed, partly because of the peer pressure.

The Finn smashed the first bottle on the Swede's head, then the second and so on, but he stopped after smashing nine bottles.

"So, when are you going to smash the tenth bottle?," asked the Swede.

"What? And give $200 to a Swede? NEVER!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

O.M.G., I'm rich!

I have:

Silver in the Hair

Gold in the Teeth

Crystals in the Kidneys

Sugar in the Blood

Lead in the Pants

Iron in the Arteries

And

An inexhaustible supply of Natural Gas.

I never thought I'd accumulate such wealth, now I can buy that gold-plated yacht and the Bentley.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A New Brunswicker, a Quebecer, and a Newfie were walking down the road together and they bumped into a lantern with a genie inside.

Out pops the genie and he says, "I will grant you one wish each. Who wants to go first?"

The New Brunswicker says, "Me, I want to go first."

So the genie replies, "Ok, what is your wish?"

The New Brunswicker said, "My wish is to have a 2-lane highway across New Brunswick, smooth as a baby's bottom!"

The genie said, "Poof! There you go. A highway as smooth as a baby's bottom!"

The Quebecer pipes up and says, "Well I am going next!

Genie, I want a 20-foot wall around the border of Quebec to keep all the [blip] Englishmen out!"

Genie, "Poof! There's your 20-foot wall. Now Newfie, it is your turn.

What do you want?"

The Newfie looks at the genie and asks, "Genie, is that wall you just put around Quebec waterproof?"

Genie, "Yep!"

Newfie, "Filler up!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

Good morning everyboomie. wave

This is pretty much being dictated by a stiff neck, and a mind that is b-l-a-n-k. eek

The dictation is that I should use fewer d-a-s-h-e-s and cut it shorter, the sooner to get to bedder. sleep

rolleyes

The blank refers to the big empty void inside my hoid .......er.............head. slapforehead

Pardon but there is one tiny thought in there bouncing around "dashing" here and there, and that is;

Have a happy day everyone. thumbsup

joe





Edited by gymcandy1 (09/28/12 12:08 AM)
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#838835 - 09/28/12 12:26 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
manxman Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 07/23/02
Posts: 15523
Loc: Unionville
Thanks for the laughs Joe.
Good morning to you and all the boomers to follow. Happy Friday all wave
_________________________
Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.

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#838840 - 09/28/12 12:58 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65494
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Good mornimg boomies! It's going to be a very early day so I can drop hubby off at Ryder Cup for the day. He is very excited.
Then I am off to Zumba, run the dogs and then in the corner for the rest of the day. It will be a full day.

We had an awesome time dancing last night. It was great having Peter and SAm with me. yay

Have a happy day everyone, I am tired...
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#838853 - 09/28/12 02:45 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 7965
Loc: Greece
Good morning my friends,today is the
first day that we all feel better penguin
I wish you all a nice day wave
_________________________

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#838860 - 09/28/12 04:16 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17465
Loc: Marlborough USA
wave Good Morning Joe, Ana, manxman and Haroula. Joe funny funnies! Ana sounds like a nice day for you! Glad the dancing was fun! Manxman enjoy your day too. Haroula glad you are feeling better. Coffee's ready Cailyn. Happy day All! wave
_________________________
Gerry

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#838872 - 09/28/12 05:55 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
Midge Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 04/30/00
Posts: 14712
Loc: Massachusetts
Good morning. Thanks Joe for your funny openers. Have a great day today. Hi manxman, Ana, Haroula, Gerry, and all who follow me in today. I have an early shift today. Today is the last long shift as Dr Bliss is much better. He doesn't need us to work longer shifts anymore. Less than a month ago he had double back surgery. I think he's amazing.

Have a great Friday everyone. Please find some time to exercise.

Midgie hearts
_________________________
Just do it.

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#838873 - 09/28/12 06:09 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 5612
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Hello and goodbye. wave

Have a fantastic Friday, everyone. cat

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#838879 - 09/28/12 07:09 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8160
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Not sure what's on the agenda for today yet. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful TGIF. Danish and Apple Fritters in the NC. summer
_________________________
Connie

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#838884 - 09/28/12 07:16 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14694
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, have a happy day too!

Manxman, good morning.

Ana, enjoy your Zumba class. Glad you had a good time dancing last night. It looked like fun.

Haroula, glad all is well!

Cailyn, I'll save you some coffee.

Midge, glad Dr Bliss is recovering well.

Venus, have a good workday.

Can't walk the dogs as yet. It's raining out there. Wishing everyone a super day!

Morning Connie, enjoy whatever plans you decide on today. Thanks for the Danish.


Edited by GBC (09/28/12 07:17 AM)
_________________________
Gail

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#838893 - 09/28/12 08:31 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
SharonB Offline
Settled Boomer

Registered: 01/23/09
Posts: 934
Loc: Delaware, USA
Good morning Gameboomers!

Good morning Manxman - Happy Friday!

Good morning Ana - Glad you were able to dance with Peter and Sam... er .. do I know who they are? think

Haroula, glad to hear you're on the mend. yay

Good morning Midgie -- As it happens I will start getting a little exercise. I just hope it doesn't kill me. laugh

Venus -- Hello and Goodbye and Fantastic Friday to you too! happydance

Good morning Connie! TGIF -- I would love to have a cheese danish but believe I will stick to having oatmeal and diet coke this morning. smile

Good morning, Gail! I hope it stops raining soon as I'm sure your dogs are pretty anxious to go out! puppy

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#838903 - 09/28/12 09:36 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
Yankee Clipper Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 08/27/04
Posts: 2115
Loc: Lexington, Texas
Wow i'm up early -6:45 AM and this is why.

A furry calisthenics-ing on my stomach, a furry sharp paw striking my right forhead and a 2 cat chorus: "Guess wot guess wot
we know wot you got
Fancy Feast Fancy Feast for the beast
boom diddy yat-dah bahbahba
anda badda bing badda boom bahbhbah
etcetcetc"

So I left the watm bed and fed

And then again I drank tooooo hottttt coffee boy! that's a wake-up. I'm positive there was a hahahahaha in the kittycat corner direction.
But mornings are nice though -I guess they did me a favor. The hour of the pearl -John Steinbeck

Nan -groceries- the 150 also include lotsa pet food and a bag of yogurt raisens and other vegge stuff for me. Saturday is a good day for making lasagna. I'll rest up for today

Take good care of your pets and other animals and enjoy the day
_________________________
I wish I were a cat and belonged to me ~ My Aunt Helen Mary Rose

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#838908 - 09/28/12 09:55 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65494
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Sharon, I'll let you put a face behind the names. Here is Me this is my son Peter and this is my daughter Sam. I am fortunate that they enjoy hanging out with me as much as I enjoy hanging out with them. hearts

Haroula, I am so glad you are feeling better. A whole houseful of sick people had to be a nightmare.

Gerry, have a great day.

Midgie, I am glad your client is doing better.

Venus, hope work goes well.

Connie, I hope something fun comes up to do today.

Gail, how are you doing? I'll send some sunshine your way so you can get out.

Yankee, hubby got me up to take him to the Ryder Cup early this morning. I had to stop at Starbucks to get rid of my headache from last night. lol
I make lasagna using eggplant instead of noodles and it's absolutely fantastic. I hope yours is delicious.

I have ten minutes to motivate myself to go to class. It's not looking good. rotfl
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#838910 - 09/28/12 10:06 AM Re: TGIF [Re: BrownEyedTigre]
Darlene Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 9440
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Hope your Friday is Fab-U-Lous!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

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#838913 - 09/28/12 10:48 AM Re: TGIF [Re: gymcandy1]
Yankee Clipper Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 08/27/04
Posts: 2115
Loc: Lexington, Texas
That's a good idea using eggplant instead of pasta for the layers. I do like eggplant. One year I grew Italian e'plant -it's pink and white and sooooo good. 1st I will put the sauce on and then make Amish noodles and cut it lasagna size. Then.....ohmy ohmy the workworkwork. But it will be good. I hope there are enough cookware in the household. I even bought the fresh mozerella. There ought to be several meals for me unless my son visits -he always hoovers up whatever's in the fridge.

Edit: My gosh Ana -your children could be in the movies. And you!!! So glad you all are G'Boomers


Edited by Yankee Clipper (09/28/12 10:53 AM)
Edit Reason: wow
_________________________
I wish I were a cat and belonged to me ~ My Aunt Helen Mary Rose

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#838915 - 09/28/12 11:00 AM Re: TGIF [Re: Yankee Clipper]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30107
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
Good morning everybody. wave

I've been entertaining the Dish guy this morning. He came to put my dish, which has been on the ground, on a pole like I told them to to at installation. He actually got here on time this time. bravo

Now Baby is getting very restless, so I'm heading to Mom's to do some "stuff". yes

I hope you all have a super day. woot

joe

Ana you're such a cutie pie. hearts


Edited by gymcandy1 (09/28/12 11:02 AM)
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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