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#839056 - 09/28/12 10:57 PM Saturdiner
gymcandy1 Online   happy
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30021
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma

"There is always one moment in childhood when the door opens and lets in the future." -- Graham Green

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


"How was your golf game, dear?" asked Jack's wife.

"Well I was hitting pretty well, but my eyesight's gotten so bad I couldn't see where the ball went."

"Well you're 75 years old now, Jack, why don't you take my brother Scott along?" suggested his wife.

"But he's 85 and doesn't even play golf anymore," protested Jack.

"But he's got perfect eyesight. He could watch your ball," his wife pointed out.

The next day Jack teed off with Scott looking on. Jack swung, and the ball disappeared down the middle of the fairway. "Do you see it?" asked Jack.

"Yup," Scott answered.

"Well, where is it?" yelled Jack, peering off into the distance.

"I can‘t remember."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THERE IS MAN AT THE PARK SITTING ON THE
BENCH CRYING.
SOMEONE ASKED, WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
HE REPLIED: I HAVE JUST MARRIED THIS BEAUTIFUL 30 YEAR
OLD GIRL, SHE IS WONDERFUL, SHE COOKS
DELICIOUS MEALS, SHE KEEPS THE HOUSE VERY
CLEAN, SEX IS GREAT!
THE MAN ASKED: SO WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
THE ELDERLY MAN ANSWERED: I FORGOT
WHERE I LIVE.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A 60-year-old man went to the doctor for a check-up. The doctor told him, "You're in terrific shape. There's nothing wrong with you. Why, you might live forever. You have the body of a 35 year old. By the way, how old was your father when he died?"

The 60 year old responded, "Who said he was dead?"

The doctor was surprised and asked, "How old is he and is he very active?"

The 60 year old responded, "Well, he is 82 years old and he still goes skiing three times a season and surfing three times a week during the summer."

The doctor couldn't believe it. "Well, how old was your grandfather when he died?"
The 60 year old responded again, "Who said he was dead?"

The doctor was astonished. He said, "You mean to tell me you are 60 years old and both your father and your grandfather are alive? Is your grandfather very active?"

The 60 year old said, "He goes skiing at least once a season and surfing once a week during the summer. Not only that," said the patient, "my grandfather is 106 years old, and next week he is getting married again."

The doctor said, "At 106 years old, why on earth would your grandfather want to get married?"

His patient looked up at the doctor and said, "Who said he wanted to?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man asked his wife, "What would you most like for your birthday?"
She said, "I'd love to be ten again."

On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a theme park. He put her on every ride in the park, the Death Slide, The Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear. Everything there was, she had a go.

She staggered out of the theme park five hours later, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Into McDonald's they went, where she was given a Double Big Mac with extra fries and a strawberry shake. Then off to a movie theater, more burgers, popcorn, cola and sweets. At last she staggered home with her husband and collapsed into bed.

Her husband leaned over and asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being ten again?"

One eye opened and she groaned, "Actually I meant dress size."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just has a fit, telling her not to dare go out like that.

The teenager tells her "Loosen up Grams. These are modern times.
You gotta let your rosebuds show!" and out she goes.

The next day the teenager comes downstairs, and the grandmother is sitting there with no top on. The teenager wants to die.

She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate.

"Loosen up, sweetie. If you can show off your rosebuds, then I can display my hanging baskets."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. wave

Wake up, sit up, cheer up, suck it up, get up…….wait..wait..wait a minute. I said “wake up”. That’s always the first thing. You can’t go walking around all day with your eyes closed you know. sleep

If you do, someone is going to take advantage of you. evil

One way or another.

If you come in the diner like that, I’m gonna have you stand in the corner and hold a potted plant.

Your drool can keep it watered. snicker

Maybe I’ll stand you by the front door holding a tray of condiments.

This could be fun.

You are getting sleepy….verrry sleeeepy……….and so am I. zombie

Have a happy day everyone. woot

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#839068 - 09/29/12 12:16 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 64906
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Good morning Joe and all! Yesterday was a day of crazy multi-tasking and I hope today will be better. I have to work, but I hope to get the dogs out for a run too. Later in the evening we have a date with my sis and BIL for dinner. yay

I hope you all have a happy day!
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#839081 - 09/29/12 02:25 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 7649
Loc: Greece
Good morning Joe,Ana and all,wish you
a happy day penguin wave
_________________________

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#839083 - 09/29/12 02:32 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: Haroula]
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 01/08/06
Posts: 6043
Loc: Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Good morning Joe,Ana,Haroula,and all who stop by later wave It's a rainy weekend here thumbsdown very few campers left,we are closing next weekend for the season! Can't believe it will be Columbus day next week!! I'll put the coffee and keep it hot,enjoy your day everyone puppy
_________________________
I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.

Sue

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#839084 - 09/29/12 02:48 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: cailyn]
Drmojo Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 12/04/04
Posts: 1761
Loc: Washington In the Wet corner
Morning Boom Boom Buddies~ wave


Howdy Joe, Ana, Haroula, & Sue
have a nice day everyone flowers


Yankee thats too funny I got stuck in the mud last
year in my battery chair and I had to crawl in the mud
to get my chair unstuck when I was pushing the chair
it speewed mud all over me on my face too you should
have see the look on my Mom's face when I got home rotfl
that is wayyy too funny about your thief dog puppy

my DR appts went OK my BP is still high on the top
my kidneys are causing it so back to my Kidney Doc`
got a ultra sound done on my neck

Mojo got his new shoes today he thinks he's
pretty Hot stuff running around kickin his heels up lol



Karen puppy cat


Edited by Drmojo (09/29/12 03:15 AM)
_________________________
OSO live
OSO Love
++OSO Strong++



Peace be with you~

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#839091 - 09/29/12 04:52 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17140
Loc: Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana, Haroula, Cailyn and Karen. Stay awake crazy Joe! crazy Ana relax and enjoy your dinner with your sister and BIL. smile Haroula hope the sun shines for you today. cool Cailyn you and I are sharing the rain this weekend. We had 2 inches of rain yesterday and some parts of the state had 4 inches. rolleyes Karen good to hear your Doctor Appointment went well. wave catrub
yes Wishing everyone a relaxing weekend! yes
_________________________
Gerry

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#839099 - 09/29/12 07:35 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
Midge Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 04/30/00
Posts: 14632
Loc: Massachusetts
Good morning. Joe you crack me up. Thanks for the funnies this morning. I hope you have an easy work day today. Morning Ana. enjoy your dinner date with your sis and BIL. I have an easy work schedule later. Just 3 hours at 5:00. Morning Haroula, Sue, Karen Gerry, and all who come in after me. I hope everyone has a great Saturday. Please remember to exercise. It's so important. smile

Midgie hearts
_________________________
Just do it.

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#839100 - 09/29/12 07:37 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14421
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, wishing you a wonderful sleep and a great weekend.

Ana, hope you get a chance to relax today.

Haroula, happy day to you also!

Cailyn, I stand with cup in hand for much needed coffee. Thanks!

Karen, wishing you a super day! Good luck with all your appointments. Yay for Mo's new shoes. Talk to you later.

Gerry, weather is the same here.

Hope this rain clears up some. Dogs are getting antsie. Wishing everyone a great weekend.
_________________________
Gail

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#839104 - 09/29/12 08:02 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
Space Quest Fan Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 9517
Loc: Columbus,Ohio USA
Good morning everyone. Have a great Saturday.

Ana,

I watched the Ryder Cup golf match from Chicago yesterday and the Chicago crowd was rocking! penguin
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#839108 - 09/29/12 08:21 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8066
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. We slept in this morning. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Saturday. Danish, Bacon Sandwiches, and Fruit cups in the NC. summer
_________________________
Connie

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#839110 - 09/29/12 08:25 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
SharonB Offline
Settled Boomer

Registered: 01/23/09
Posts: 934
Loc: Delaware, USA
Good morning Gameboomers. I've been up most of the night worrying and stressing about what seems like everything in my life. Trying to make myself get out of it and feel better.

Will take walk later and that should help. Will try to have positive attitude and hopefully some of this depression will lift and I'll feel better. Got some stuff I need to do today then I can settle in for some gaming. smile Plan to complete Space Quest Incinerations.

Hoping all have a happy productive gaming Saturday! smile

Think I'll have Cheerios with skim milk with my Diet Coke this morning. laugh

Sharon zombie

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#839117 - 09/29/12 09:21 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 42260
Loc: Alabama
Super Saturday ya'll puppy

It's official happydance Today is The Day! broccoli I'll be cleaning as long as my back can stand it. Then I'll clean me up and around 8 tonight I'll drive by braille to the airport to pick up my KISA. This trip has seemed longer than most and it will be good to have him home again. wave

Let's have a cleaning fairy convention here, starting in about an hour. I have to fuel up on coffee first. puppy


Edited by looney4labs (09/29/12 09:21 AM)
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#839138 - 09/29/12 11:32 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 13637
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Joe did ya get any of that rain the radar map is showing??? What fun plans for your day off today?? Thanks for the chuckles and have a great day!

Oh Ana what a lovely way to take a break from the corner. Enjoy dinner and the company!! Is the new one there yet??

wave Haroula, Gerry, Cailyn, Midge. Have a lovely day!

Connie it is good to sleep in once in awhile!! Have a lovely day and thanks for the ztreats.

Gail hope that all is going well there for you! HUGS! Hope the rain is gone and the sun shines brightly!! Have a lovely day!

Karen.....I remember that. lol Funny now but I'm sure it wasn't at the time. Glad to hear that the appointments seem to have gone well. Hopefully the kidneys will straighten up for you and start doing what they do best!! HUGS!! Give Bella a cuddle for me!!

Space I hopethere is no rain this weekend and that you can make a few trips to the park!! Have a lovely weekend!!

Sharon when you spend your time worrying you are taking todays sunshine and putting it behind tomorrows clouds!! All that worry can't change a thing. HUGS!!! Enjoy breakfast!

WooHoo L4l!! I know that your day is going to fly!! Have a fun time with the cleaning fairies. lol

wave
Nan

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#839141 - 09/29/12 11:40 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
Geo Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 06/01/05
Posts: 2308
Loc: Michigan
SharonB
Why havent you answered my PM?

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#839144 - 09/29/12 11:54 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 64906
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
lol So far this day is as hectic as yesterday was. I have been out and about and have more errands to run before I can consider things done. First I am going to finish the game before the computer decides it's time to go into a permanent sleep. My new computer is on the trucj ready for deliery on Monday so I am excited!


Space, my hubby loved the Ryder Cup yesterday but it's brought a lot of chaos to the area. He saw Tiger and the others and he got a high five from Michael Jordan. They say it's bringing 130 million dollars into our local economy from all the visitors. That is so awesome!

gotta run, but I will be back.

_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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