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#840536 - 10/05/12 08:51 PM Re: Saturdiner
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30117
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
Benjamin Franklin (1706 - 1790)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Mr. Leno of the Tonight Show went J-walking and asked pedestrians some science questions, he discovered some amazing new facts about the universe:

Jay Leno: "Why does dew appear on plants in the morning when the Sun comes up?"
A waitress: "Is it because the Sun makes them perspire?"

Jay Leno: "Why does the Moon orbit the Earth?"
An auto mechanic: "To get to the other side?"

Jay Leno: What are magnets?"
A taxi driver: "Are they the things crawling over a week-old dead cat?"

Jay Leno: Which is more useful, the Sun or the Moon?"
A thirteen-year old: [Pause] "I think it's the Moon because the moon shines at night when you want the light, whereas the Sun shines during the day when you don't need it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two women were walking through the woods when a frog called out to them and said: "Help me, ladies! I am a stockbroker who, through an evil witch's curse, has been transformed into a frog. If one of you will kiss me, I'll be returned to my former state!"

One woman took out her purse, grabbed the frog, and stuffed it inside her handbag. The other woman, aghast, screamed, "Didn't you hear him? If you kiss him, he'll turn into a stockbroker!"

The second woman replied, "Sure, but these days a talking frog is worth more than a stockbroker!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Signs Your Girlfriend Is Going To Dump You...

-- Your visa card and your belt both hit their limit.

-- She's been wearing an engagement ring for three weeks, but you don't recall proposing to her.

-- She just started a college course that meets seven nights a week.

-- She says she has to tell you something... on Jerry Springer.

-- Whenever she introduces you it's always "I would like you to meet an old friend of mine..."

-- She leaves a message on your phone and identifies herself by both her first and last names.

-- Your other girlfriend told you so.

-- The dartboard behind your photo on her wall.

-- Her girlfriends look at you, tilt their heads, and say, "You haven't got a clue, do you?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[b]Insulting in an Appreciative Manner[/]

"You're so smart, for an American."

"You don't sweat that much for a fat guy!"

"I'm amazed by the level of success readers have after following your advice."

"Your plastic surgeon has such a delightful sense of humor!"

"Relax, sweetie... you were perfectly adequate."

"You're more of a "street smart" kind of guy."

"You're not the kind of girl guys date; you're the kind of girl they marry."

"You're so evolved…for a man."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A lawyer was well into a lengthy cross-examination of a witness, stopped and said: "I object, Your Honor! One of the jurors is asleep."

The Judge ruled: "You put him to sleep... You wake him up."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

A woman was sure that her husband was cheating on her, and having an affair with the maid. So she laid down a trap.

One evening she suddenly sent the maid home for the weekend & didn't tell the husband.

That night when they went to bed, the husband gave the old story: Excuse me my dear, my stomach aches, & went to the bathroom.

The wife promptly went into the maid's bed. She switched the lights off. When he came in silently, he wasted no time or words having his way with her...

When he finished, the wife said: You didn't expect to find me in this bed, did you? And then she switched on the light...

No madam, said the gardener…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. 'I am so ashamed, Doctor, she said. I guess I let myself go.

The physician was checking her eyes and ears. Don't feel ashamed, Miss. You don't look that bad.

Do you really think so, Doctor? she asked.

The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and said,
Of course.... Now just open your mouth and say moo.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

Things Not To Do While Waiting For Your Date At Her Parents' House

Sniff the air and say it smells like a bordello.

Repeatedly zip and unzip your fly.

Go into a lengthy story about how you had Mexican food last night and ask if you can use the bathroom.

Ask what time you should return your date tomorrow morning.

Recite a couple of bawdy limericks.

Pretend to eat your arm.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

On a grave from the 1880s in Nantucket , Massachusetts :

Under the sod and under the trees,
Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.
He is not here, there's only the pod.
Pease shelled out and went to God.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

Good morning everyboomie. wave

Tomorrow is here, and it looks to be a pretty cool day here. woot

Yesterday, when tomorrow arrived it was looking like a hot time for all, but we are only going to be in the mid 50s today. Just what a penguin wants to hear. penguin

Me too. thumbsup

It's kinda like a Friday for me, and I get off at 3:00. Yee Haa! Yaa Hoo! Yee Hoo! Yaa Haa! blush

OK, I've gotta get all of this body paint washed off before I leave for work. yes

They expect me to wear real clothes at Lowe's. razz

Have a happy day everyone. yay

joe



.
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#840542 - 10/05/12 09:05 PM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65557
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Glad you got your cool weather. I am not liking ours but I best just accept the fact that summer is over. We are in the 30's tonight and the house is very chilly already.

Happy Friday Joe!

I will be dancing the morning away with Sam at a charity dance marathon with our favorite instructors. I am expecting to be quite tired after two hours of straight dancing. eek

I'll catch you all in the afternoon.

Have a happy day!

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#840551 - 10/05/12 09:34 PM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
Midge Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 04/30/00
Posts: 14720
Loc: Massachusetts
Hi Joe and Ana. Thanks Joe for making me laugh at this late hour (for me). Ana have a great time tomorrow.

I'm gonna say good night. Good night (heh,heh). See you on the flip side.

Midgie hearts
_________________________
Just do it.

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#840559 - 10/06/12 01:27 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: Midge]
Drmojo Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 12/04/04
Posts: 1822
Loc: Washington In the Wet corner


Morning Boom Boom Buddies wave



Hope everyone has a nice day flowers Doc puppy cat pacify
_________________________
OSO live
OSO Love
++OSO Strong++



Peace be with you~

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#840567 - 10/06/12 03:08 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 8010
Loc: Greece
Good morning boomies,have all a happy Sunday wave
_________________________
Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#840574 - 10/06/12 04:46 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17504
Loc: Marlborough USA
wave Good Morning Joe, Ana, Midgie, Karen and Haroula. Cailyn I hope you are resting. Coffee is ready Have a great day all! wave
_________________________
Gerry

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#840581 - 10/06/12 06:24 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14714
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, see you after 3:00.

Ana, I can't even imagine dancing in the morning. Have fun!

Midgie, have a great day when you awake.

Karen, enjoy your day. Talkk to you later.

Haroula, have a good day!

Gerry, thanks for the coffee.

Cailyn, well wishes. Hope you're feeling better soon.

Wishing everyone a great weekend!
_________________________
Gail

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#840588 - 10/06/12 07:07 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8165
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Ana, I'll be more than happy to send you our heat. It's still in the upper 80's to low 90's. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Saturday. Danish, Honey Buns, and French Toast in the NC. summer
_________________________
Connie

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#840591 - 10/06/12 07:37 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
Space Quest Fan Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 9657
Loc: Columbus,Ohio USA
Good morning everyone. wave

It is cold here too Ana. eek
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#840600 - 10/06/12 09:09 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65557
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to dance I go. It's 33 degrees out, I'd rather be in bed snuggled right now. lol

Midgie, have a great day!

Doc, I hope you and family are doing well.

Haroula, are you feeling better?

Gerry, enjoy your fall walk.

Sue, big hugs to you. So sorry you are ill. hearts

Gail, once the music starts blaring, it's easy.
How are you doing?

Connie, 80-90 is my favorite temps. I'd feel better if I could turn the heat on here but hubby would not be pleased.

Space, stay warm! I bet the dogs like running in it. How is your dog doing?

Off I go, catch you later!
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#840601 - 10/06/12 09:11 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 13760
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Morning everybody!! Just a quick stop to wish everybody a wonderful start to their weekend.!!

Later a birthday party for my great granddaughter, she will be two on the 11th!!

Have a wonderful day everybody!!

Ana have fun dancing the morning away!! lol

wave
Nan

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#840608 - 10/06/12 10:08 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 5633
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Joe, can you send some of that cooler weather over here? It still thinks its summer where I am. lol Enjoy your Friday.

Have fun dancing, Ana. happydance

Hope you had a good night's sleep, Midge.

Have a nice day, too, Karen.

Have a happy Saturday as well, Haroula.

Enjoy your Saturday, Gerry.

Have a great weekend, too, Gail.

Thanks for all the food, Connie. smile

Good morning, Space Quest.

birthday to your great granddaughter, Nan! Have fun at the party.

Finally, I'm off and have a chance to post! What with my friend back from Greece, fiance working overnights which throws off both our schedules, practicing singing and acting and of course regular work on top of that, my plate's been a little full lately. lol Also, at work, they're doing a complete remodel of my department, which makes it hard for me to do my work at all. Right now, I have a lot of product piling up in the back with no place to put it out on the floor. crazy I can't wait until that whole fiasco is over.

Today, though, I'm going to enjoy my day off with a game. grin

Hope everyone has a terrific Saturday. cat

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#840612 - 10/06/12 10:20 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
SharonB Offline
Settled Boomer

Registered: 01/23/09
Posts: 934
Loc: Delaware, USA
Good morning, Joe and All Gameboomers! wave

Ana, it's great you can dance after all that weight lifting. rah

Midgie & Doc, Good morning!

Haroula, Hope you are feeling better.

Gerry, Thanks for the coffee but I still prefer my Diet Coke. lol

Connie, Good morning. I'll take you up on that French Toast. smile

Space Quest Fan and Nan, Good morning!

Sunny and 80 here today -- Rainy and 50 tomorrow.

Have been juggling my checkbook and working with imaginary numbers... woozy

I need to lie down. Have a great day everyone! catrub

Best way to spend a Saturday, Venus laugh

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#840634 - 10/06/12 11:28 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Online   content
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 42542
Loc: Alabama
Super Saturday ya'll puppy

Somehow my alarm clock got set to 6:40 and then turned on. I remember lying there thinking, "Oh my goodness Hubby, turn off your alarm" and then realizing it wasn't his alarm. So I fumbled around and got it off but somehow reset it to 9:40. rotfl

Anyway, I got up to find hubby in the kitchen with the boys and son in bed. I'll kick him out as soon as the boys have finished breakfast.

KISA is going to reset our router this morning to see if that will help out some of you net problems. Then later today the cable guy is supposed to be here. Our DVR has decided it's not one.

Other than that today will be routine chores and kids and games (I hope)

Back later wave
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#840637 - 10/06/12 11:40 AM Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1]
my10rugrats Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 08/05/06
Posts: 3343
Loc: kansas
brrrrrrrrrrrr morning everyone. its a chilly 44 here and only suppose to get to 49 today. we are under a freeze warning for tonight and tomorrow. i know for a fact i am not ready for cold weather to set in. we did get our house plants in yesterday that we had on the front porch. not much planned for today, really want to take it easy for a few days to g et my back time to rest. hope everyone has a great day

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