GAMEBOOMERS provides you with all the latest PC adventure computer games information, forum, walkthroughs, reviews and news.
GB Reviews Latest & Upcoming Adventure Games GB Annual Game Lists GB Interviews

BAAGS

GB @ acebook

GB @ witter

About Us
Walkthroughs free games galore Independent Games World of Adventure Patches Game Publishers & Developers GameBoomers Store
Big Fish Games Homepage    
Page 1 of 3 1 2 3 >
Topic Options
#843905 - 10/22/12 12:01 AM Monday
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30152
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
Robert X. Cringely,
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?
AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.


2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS.
Police in Oakland , CA , spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, 'Please come out and give yourself up.'



3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???
An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts!


4. THE GETAWAY!
A man walked into a Topeka , Kansas Kwik Stop and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.



5. DID I SAY THAT???
Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: 'Give me all your money or I'll shoot', the man shouted, 'that's not what I said!'



6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING???
A man spoke frantically into the phone: 'My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart'.
'Is this her first child?' the doctor asked. 'No!' the man shouted, 'This is her husband!'





7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!
In Modesto , CA , Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun. Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (hellooooooo)!


8. THE GRAND FINALE!!!
Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert an hour east of Bakersfield, CA, some folks new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 foot boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power they applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby marina, thinking someone there may be able to tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out-drive went up and down, and the propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.
NOW REMEMBER...THIS IS TRUE.
Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TEXAS BEER JOINT SUES LOCAL CHURCH OVER LIGHTNING STRIKE!
(This should keep you chuckling for awhile)
A bar called Drummond's (in Mt Vernon, Texas ) began construction on an expansion of their building, hoping to "grow" their business.
In response, the local Southern Baptist Church started a campaign to block the bar from expanding - petitions, prayers, etc.
About a week before the bar's grand re-opening, a bolt of lightning struck the bar and burned it to the ground!
Afterward, the church folks were rather smug - bragging about "the power of prayer".
The angry bar owner eventually sued the church on grounds that the church... "Was ultimately responsible for the demise of his building, through direct actions or indirect means."
Of course, the church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise.
The judge read carefully through the plaintiff's complaint and the defendant's reply.
He then opened the hearing by saying:
"I don't know how I'm going to decide this, but it appears from the paperwork that what we have here is a bar owner who now believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that does not!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I would like to share an experience with you, about drinking and driving.

As you well know, some of us have been known to have had brushes with the authorities on our way home from the odd social session over the years.

A couple of nights ago, I was out for a few drinks with some friends at the Marriott Hotel and had a few too many beers and some rather nice red wine.

Knowing full well I may have been slightly over the limit, I did something I've never done before: I took a bus home.

Sure enough I passed a police road block but as it was a bus, they waved it past.

I arrived home safely without incident, which was a real surprise , as I have never driven a bus before and am not sure where I got it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am sending this only to friends whom I think have dabbled in
physics or advanced math at some point in their lives.
Enjoy.

Math/Physics Question

Situation:
You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed.
On your right side is a sharp drop off.
And on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you.
Directly in front of you is a bounding kangaroo,
and your horse is unable to overtake it.
Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the kangaroo.

Question:
What must you do to get out of this potentially
highly dangerous situation safely?

See answer below.















Get your drunk behind off of that merry-go-round.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Good morning everyboomie.

"Good morning Mr Sunshine. You brighten up my day. Come sit beside me in your way."

"Good morning Star shine. The Earth stands alone. You twinkle above us. We twinkle below."

"Good morning girl. How'd you sleep last night? You're several ages older now. Your eyes have started showing how, the little girl's growing now. Good morning girl."

There.....some wake-up music for you. Take your pick and I'll sing it to you personally.

Just don't ask me to sing you to sleep tonight. snicker

think "In the midnight moonlight hour, I'll be walking along that lonely mile, and every time I do, I keep seeing this picture of you."

Ok I gotta stop doing that. I could keep it up all night, and nearly did last night. slapforehead

It was after 2:00am when I went to bed, and longer for me to go to sleep.

Not because I was running around singing everyone to sleep mind you, but because I was watching music videos, and it got me all wound up.

"Now that woman that I had wrapped around my finger just come unwound." slapforehead

Ya see? Everything reminds me of a song that I like.

People used to tell me, "Gosh I just mentioned one word, and you start singing a song about it."

It's a curse I can't fight. blush

"Breaking rocks in the hot sun. I fought the law and the law won. I fought the law and the law won."

I can break out in a song anywhere.

Most people would enjoy it too if I didn't sound like an alley cat caught in a clothes dryer. rolleyes

They say "Joe you missed your calling........calling pigs."

Pepper likes it.

Have a happy day everyone.

joe



Edited by gymcandy1 (10/22/12 12:04 AM)
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

Top
#843914 - 10/22/12 02:49 AM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Online   happy
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 8104
Loc: Greece
Good morning boomers,have all a nice day happydance wave
_________________________
Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



Top
#843915 - 10/22/12 03:11 AM Re: Monday [Re: Haroula]
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 01/08/06
Posts: 6095
Loc: Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Good morning Joe,Haroula,and all boomers waveIt's the start of another week so I'll get the coffee ready,Hi gerry to you when you come in how are you feeling?Have a great day all sherlock
_________________________
I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.

Sue

Top
#843924 - 10/22/12 05:35 AM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17612
Loc: Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Haroula and Cailyn. Joe hope you sleep in this morning! Haroula have a nice day. Cailyn thanks for the coffee. I'm good I think. I'm seeing a "floater" in one eye. Guess it's another old age thing! Hope you all have a great day! wave
_________________________
Gerry

Top
#843926 - 10/22/12 05:47 AM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
Midge Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 04/30/00
Posts: 14745
Loc: Massachusetts
Good morning. Joe my Mom used to do that all the time. She'd break into song if you'd say something from a song. Thanks. It brings back memories. kissy

Morning Haroula,Sue, and all who come in the diner today. I have an early shift again. Se you when I come home.

Midgie hearts
_________________________
Just do it.

Top
#843928 - 10/22/12 05:59 AM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 5678
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Time for yet another work whoosh. wave

Have a great Monday, everyone. cat

Top
#843933 - 10/22/12 06:37 AM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14783
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, we should all have a sing-a-long this morning!

Ana, is this going to be a relaxing day for you?

Haroula, have a great day!

Cailyn, my coffee cup needs a refill, thanks.

Gerry, enjoy whatever plans you have today.

Midgie, enjoy your early shift.

Venus, besides work how have you been?

I had a busy weekend. Going to relax and take it easy today.
_________________________
Gail

Top
#843938 - 10/22/12 07:45 AM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8197
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. We had a wonderful trip. We brought the laptops, but couldn't get either one of them to connect to the internet. They didn't like the way the router was set up. We visited some Historical sites, a Sea bird sanctuary, and a Botanical gardens. The weather was nice, but a bit warm. Now it's back to catching up to everything here. To all here and all who follow, have a Great Monday. Danish, French Toast, and Omelets in the NC. summer
_________________________
Connie

Top
#843953 - 10/22/12 10:01 AM Re: Monday [Re: connie]
Darlene Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 9479
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Love the songs! smile Have a great Monday!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

Top
#843969 - 10/22/12 11:33 AM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
flutist Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/17/01
Posts: 11422
Loc: Kirkwood, MO USA
Well, Good morning y'all.

I have been here, just night right here. Just don't know where the days have been going to. Got a haircut this morning, I was getting shaggy. Woof. Cleaned up under my sink as I am getting my new dishwasher installed this afternoon. I gotta do my treadmill and have orchestra this evening. Getting new music for the next concert. Hope it is good.

Yesterday was a beautiful day and it is going to be nice for the next couple of days. Can't complain about that.

I'm going to go sneak in some gaming before lunch, so I will wish everyone a wonderful day.

Bets
_________________________
Corgis fill your life with Joy, your heart with Love, and your soul with Sunshine.

Top
#843973 - 10/22/12 11:43 AM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 7413
Loc: San Diego, CA
Off to explore all the sidewalk/road construction on two nearby streets that dead end into mine. One is almost done (asphalt starting today) and the other just got a load of new phone poles delivered. Wheeee. Gotta see if ALL the residents heeded the NO parking signs. Bet they didn't. Gonna be fun. Saw already a major amount of extra cars parked on my street farther up. Suspect they are from the adjoining 'have to move' them street. So far, no extras on my side. I'm thinking of putting up cones, or barbed wire, or getting several attack dogs, or patrolling with a tank to keep them from parking in front of my house. rotfl
_________________________
WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.

Top
#843992 - 10/22/12 01:31 PM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
flutist Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/17/01
Posts: 11422
Loc: Kirkwood, MO USA
Does anything ever go right? Maybe, maybe not. In this case it is not. Couldn't install dishwasher because cutoff valve was in the way and also soldered in. Okay, our plumber can't get here till Thursday at the earliest. In the meantime, I use the one that is still in there. Ah well, life goes on.

Bets
_________________________
Corgis fill your life with Joy, your heart with Love, and your soul with Sunshine.

Top
#843993 - 10/22/12 01:50 PM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
Lotus777 Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 3270
Loc: Oregon
Good Morning. Very chilly here, feels like snow. Huge thunderheads floating past..threat mostly, they say. I will be so glad when all this food is processed and all I have to do is cook it, lol. I am going to game a bit first, I really must!! Hope everyone has a great day and Happy Gaming. wave
_________________________
Lotus
Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.

Top
#843994 - 10/22/12 01:52 PM Re: Monday [Re: flutist]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30152
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
Good morning everybody. snicker

Maybe if you're on the West coast it's still morning. oops

I've been working on financial issues all morning, which required more cerebral activity than I'm used to. crazy

Sometimes my senses just suddenly shut down and I stare off into space for I don't know how long. cool

I call it SSO (sudden sensory overload). razz

Anyway there IS a reason that I didn't get here before lunch time, but we have storms approaching now and I have to post this quickly before they get here and kill my internet. happydance

I hope everyone has a fantasticly sensorically pleasurable day. thumbsup lol

Gotta run. The spell check police is after me.

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

Top
#844002 - 10/22/12 03:12 PM Re: Monday [Re: gymcandy1]
Yankee Clipper Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 08/27/04
Posts: 2160
Loc: Lexington, Texas
Hiho all, just browsing around, enjoying the day. Laundry, cleaning done -it's a hohum day.

Now have 9 tomato plants. If they all would grow -wow. I would eat them with olive oil and salt on homemade Italian bread -oh gosh that's good and then freeze the rest.

Off to the games -games prepare thyselves.
_________________________
I wish I were a cat and belonged to me ~ My Aunt Helen Mary Rose

Top
Page 1 of 3 1 2 3 >

Moderator:  BrownEyedTigre, looney4labs 

Who's Online
Key: Admin Global Mod Mod Staff  )
2 registered (curly, Haroula), 65 Guests and 15 Spiders online.
Newest Members
Elentgirl, tiathyme, Mr_Underhill, Lani, Rachissa
8581 Registered Users