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#846832 - 11/03/12 11:34 PM Sunday's Best
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30021
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
"Courage is the price that life exacts for granting peace. The soul that knows it not, knows no release from little things; Knows not the livid loneliness of fear."
Amelia Earhart
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A 93-year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband, decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death. Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out his old Army pistol and made the decision to shoot herself in the heart since it was badly broken anyway. Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and a burden to someone, she called her doctor's office to inquire exactly where the heart would be on a woman.

The doctor said, "Your heart would be just below your left breast."

Later that night Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to her knee.
~~~~~~~~~~

A guy was invited to an old friends' home for dinner.

His buddy preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc.

The guy was impressed since he knew the couple had been married almost 70 years, and while the wife was off in the kitchen he said to his buddy, "I think it's wonderful that after all the years you've been married, you still call your wife those pet names."

His buddy hung his head. "To tell you the truth, I forgot her name about ten years ago."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%.

The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again."

The gentleman replied, "Oh , I haven't told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three times!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three elderly men are at the doctor's office for a memory test. The doctor asks the first man, "What is three times three?"

"274," came the reply.

The doctor rolls his eyes and looks up at the ceiling, and says to the second man, "It's your turn. What is three times three?"

"Tuesday," replies the second man.

The doctor shakes his head sadly, then asks the third man, "Okay, your turn. What's three times three?"

"Nine," says the third man.

"That's great!" says the doctor. "How did you get that?"

"Simple," he says, "just subtract 274 from Tuesday."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon.

Four worms were placed into four separate jars.

The first worm was put into a container of alcohol.

The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke.

The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup.

The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.

At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results:

The first worm in alcohol - Dead.

The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead.

Third worm in chocolate syrup - Dead.

Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive.

So the Minister asked the congregation - What can you learn from this demonstration?

A little old woman in the back quickly raised her hand and said,

"If you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won't get worms."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie! wave

If Thursday follows Wednesday, then it stands to reason that.......uh.... headscratch ....this is not Thursday.

I don't know where I'd be without reason.

Although, some times I do things for no reason at all.

Like, I pluck the hair in my.....nevermind, but it was something I do for no reason at all. blush

Sometimes I did stuff out of meanness but still for no reason at all.

Like, Once I wrote "Kick Me Here" on the back of my brother's shirt, and drew an arrow pointing down to the bottom, for no real reason at all. duh

ONCE!! ?

I forgot about it, and wore that shirt myself.

The really bad thing was that I accidentally put it on backwards. slapforehead

I'm kicking myself for that mistake. oops

Sometimes I talk to myself for no reason at all.

Well that's not exactly true.

I do that so I'll know that I'm not alone. yes

Yeah ok, I guess we'd better get this posted now.

Have a happy day you guys. thumbsup

Me and joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#846840 - 11/04/12 12:00 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 64906
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
lol Thanks for starting us all out on a new day. I talk to myself too Joe, but mostly I talk to the dogs. They always listen no matter what I say to them. grin

Not sure what the day will bring today but I know my pups and I are going for a hike.

I hope you all have a great day!

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#846859 - 11/04/12 02:27 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 7651
Loc: Greece
Good morning Joe,Ana and all who follow later smile
The weather is awesome sunny and hot happydance
Hope you have a nice Sunday wave
_________________________

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#846860 - 11/04/12 02:49 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: Haroula]
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 01/08/06
Posts: 6043
Loc: Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Good morning Joe,Ana,Haroula,and all who arrive after getting an extra hour of sleep waveThat extra hour never seems to apply to me tiredAna some of my best conversations are with my pups puppyCoffee is ready wishing you all a peaceful day fall
_________________________
I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.

Sue

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#846863 - 11/04/12 04:36 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17144
Loc: Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana, Haroula and Cailyn. fall Joe I talk to myself and my kitties all the time. cat Ana like your pups they are good listeners! puppy Haroula enjoy your warm sunny day. fall It's going to be a chilly one here. shiver Cailyn I didn't get that extra hour sleep last night. Stretch, my cat, wanted me up at the usually time so I am tired! sleep Hope everyone has a relaxing Sunday! catrub
_________________________
Gerry

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#846869 - 11/04/12 05:04 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 5413
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Good morning, everyone. wave Just a quick hello and goodbye as I have to whoosh off to work again. It's going to be a long week, but at least it will reflect well in my paychecks. grin

Okay, have to run. Have a terrific Sunday, everyone. fall

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#846872 - 11/04/12 05:37 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: venus]
Gimli Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 06/15/05
Posts: 2314
Loc: Switzerland
Good Sunday morning Boomies wave

Thank you all so much for the emails and the texted messages on my contest win. I'am still on cloud 7.

Did you all sleep an hour longer? Weather here in Switzerland is so-and-so, a bit rain, a bit sunshine. Will go to my basement studio to potter around a bit.

Wishing you all a terrific Sunday fall and

Nan: please get well soon! kissy I'am thinking of you!

Hugs from Evelyne
_________________________
"You ask me what life is. That's like asking me what a carrot is. A carrot is a carrot is a carrot" (A. Chekhov)

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#846874 - 11/04/12 05:45 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: gymcandy1]
Midge Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 04/30/00
Posts: 14632
Loc: Massachusetts
Good morning.It was wonderful to be able to sleep that extra hour. Thank Joe for making me laugh out loud this morning. Morning Anakissy, Haroula, Sue, Gerry, venus, Gail when you come in, and everyone who stops by the diner. I have work this morning, then I come home to pack, then it's back to work. That'll be my day until I move. UGH!

Have a wonderful day all. See you this afternoon.

Midgie hearts
_________________________
Just do it.

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#846879 - 11/04/12 06:55 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8067
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Breakfast out this morning and some shopping. Nan, I hope you are feeling better, Hugs on the way. hearts Evelyn, Congrats on the win. yay Ana, I hope your internet behaves today. yes Midge, Hugs and good luck with your move. hearts To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Sunday. Danish, Omelets with Hash Browns and Toast, and Oatmeal with fruit in the NC. fall
_________________________
Connie

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#846885 - 11/04/12 08:04 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: gymcandy1]
Space Quest Fan Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 9517
Loc: Columbus,Ohio USA
Good morning Boomers wave
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#846899 - 11/04/12 09:08 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Online   content
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 13637
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Joe thanks for the laughs! I talk to my self too and sometimes I even answer. lol Are you off today??

Ana have a lovely run with the pups!! It is a little cool this morning at 29 but not too bad since no wind. Good thing that only WE understand our pets since some of my conversations I would not want repeated. lol Have a lovely day!

Evelyne congrats on your wonderful acheviment!! happydance And a beautiful one at that.

Haroula could I borrow a little of that heat, please??? lol Have a lovely day!

wave Cailyn, Gerry! Stay warm.

Connie have fun shopping and enjoy breakfast. Thanks for the hugs and treats!

venus have fun at work!

Midge happy packing!! May all go smoothly for the move! HUGS!

Space have a lovely day!

I feel better today and good thing too as I have daughter and family coming over for some pea soup!! Should be fun......I think. lol

We have a bear running around downtown. The police are trying to round it up and head it back into the woods.

wave
Nan

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#846907 - 11/04/12 09:33 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: auntiegram]
manxman Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 07/23/02
Posts: 15097
Loc: Unionville
Good morning everyone. Hope you all feel rested with the extra hour. Have a super Sunday. wave
_________________________
Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.

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#846920 - 11/04/12 10:00 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: auntiegram]
SharonB Offline
Settled Boomer

Registered: 01/23/09
Posts: 934
Loc: Delaware, USA
Good morning Gameboomers all!!

It was so nice waking up to an extra hour today. Feel pretty good and hope to get some things done today.

Hope you all enjoy the rest of the weekend. I don't know what I'm going to do with the day, other than enjoy it! laugh

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#846951 - 11/04/12 11:31 AM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: SharonB]
Gimli Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 06/15/05
Posts: 2314
Loc: Switzerland
Hi again...

Midge: so glad you found an apartment so soon. Now you can start anew, without grumpy Landlady.

Connie: thank you! How's hubby doing? Give him a hug from me (and one for you!).

Hi Space

Nan: I'am glad you are feeling better and thanks for the congrats. I wish you a happy Sunday with daughter and family and pea soup! And here comes a bear hug taz especially for you! Take care when you are going to town lol

Hi manxman

Hi Sharon

I'am going to the kitchen now to cook supper. It's Tuna and Chinese noodles here. Then tea and some fruits. Happy Sunday my friends! Stay warm and healthy.

Evelyne
_________________________
"You ask me what life is. That's like asking me what a carrot is. A carrot is a carrot is a carrot" (A. Chekhov)

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#846963 - 11/04/12 12:32 PM Re: Sunday's Best [Re: gymcandy1]
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 7218
Loc: San Diego, CA
Hooray for you Midge and the new apartment. I'm sending some Landlordy good vibes to the new Landlord so things will go smoothly. It's so awful when your Landlord is a jerk. I know, I was a renter myself for 20 years and had all sorts of nasty experiences!

Lovely day here in paradise. Another Santa Ana. Going to be 80ish today, but right now awesome dry weather with a light sea breeze. Air should start turning and go 'out' to sea this afternoon.

Still having some problems with my computer. The screen just locks or the computer restarts itself after booting up. Have no idea what it is. Ugh.
_________________________
WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.

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