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#847060 - 11/04/12 06:52 PM Monday's
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30159
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
"Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there."
Josh Billings
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ben and Haley had gotten up in years, and their memories weren't quite what they used to be. They found it beneficial to write things down so as not to forget them.

One evening they were sitting in the parlor and Haley said, "Ben, be a dear and go to the kitchen and fix me a dish of ice cream and put some chocolate syrup and peanuts on it. And, Ben, write it down so you don't forget the peanuts."

"That's a good idea, Dear." Ben said, and wrote it on the notepad and headed for the kitchen.

Ben was in the kitchen for a while, and returned with a plate of bacon and eggs. Haley looked at it and said, "Oh Ben, you forgot the breakfast toast."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man tells a doctor, "I think my wife's going deaf. What can I do?"

The doctor says, "Well, try to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again. Keep repeating this until she answers. That way we can see how bad the problem is."

The man goes home, sees his wife and says, "Hi honey, what's for dinner?" He doesn't hear an answer, so he moves closer. "Honey, what's for dinner?" He repeats this several times, until he's standing right next to her.

Finally, she answers, "For the sixth time, we're having Pot Roast!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As the crowded elevator descended, Mrs. Wilson became increasingly furious with her husband, who was delighted to be pressed against a gorgeous blonde.

As the elevator stopped at the main floor, the blonde suddenly whirled, slapped Mr. Wilson, and said, "That will teach you to pinch!"

Bewildered, Mr. Wilson was halfway to the parking lot with his wife when he choked, "I...I...didn't pinch that girl."

"No you didn't" said his wife, consolingly. "I did."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An elderly man was headed home in his car one evening, swerving and weaving on the road, when he was stopped by a policeman. "Have you been drinking tonight, sir?" the policeman asked

. "Well, I may have had a pint or two." The man replied, smiling. "Why do you ask?"

"Sir, your wife fell out of the car about a mile back."

"Oh, thank goodness," the man exclaimed. "I thought I'd gone deaf!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There was a little old lady standing at a corner. She had both hands holding her hat on while the wind blew her dress up around her waist.

A dignified southern gentleman came up and said, "Ma'am, you should be ashamed of yourself, letting your skirt blow around, being indecent, while both hands hold your hat."

She said, "Look mister, everything down there is seventy years old; this hat is brand new!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Grandma, how long have you and Grandpa been married?" asked young Nina.

"Fifty years," Grandma replied.

"That is so wonderful," exclaimed Nina. "And I bet in all that time, you never once thought about divorce, right?"

"Right Nina. Divorce, NEVER. Murder, lots of times, but never divorce."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie!  wave

How are you this morning?

It's too early for me to tell, I haven't set my clock back yet. tired

Ask me in another hour. 

I really like getting an extra hours sleep though. sleep

I like it so much I'm gonna set my clock up an hour every morning after I get up, and set it back an hour the next morning when my alarm goes off. Then up an hour after I get up. Then…you get the pic. sherlock

Heck I might even do two hours. 

WAIT A MINUTE!!!

Why not do a whole day!? idea

I‘m really going to catch up on my sleep now.

I'm such a geniot!

That means I'm one of your smarter idiots.  snicker

If you don't believe me ask me anything. I can tell you with all assurance I won‘t know the nanswer. Oops!

Nan might know the nanswer, but I won‘t. rotfl

I won‘t know the answer either.

Ok I'd better get going.

Tomorrow starts at 3:30.……4:30.…..lets see it would have been 3:30 but I set the clock back so I’m really getting up at 4:30, but I set the clock back, so now it’s REALLY 3:30.…………I’m so confused. crazy

Have a happy day everyone.

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#847068 - 11/04/12 08:02 PM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Online   happy
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65800
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Joe, when I was working in the office, my bedroom clock was a half hour off all the time so that I would think the alarm was going off at 5am instead of 4:30. It's a mental thing that works.

I hope your workday passes quickly. hearts

Have a happy day all! I get to go dance tonight for the first time in two weeks. Life is good.

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#847083 - 11/04/12 10:02 PM Re: Monday's [Re: BrownEyedTigre]
Darlene Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 9481
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! A very early morning for you! Hope your day goes easy peasy!

Hey, Ana! Been such a busy time for you! hearts Glad to hear you will be dancing tonight!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies! Happy Monday!

Still Sunday evening for me...

Volunteered at our church this weekend. Then it was pretty much easy peasy.

So.

To all abed, sleep To all awake, woot
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

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#847089 - 11/04/12 11:10 PM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Online   happy
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65800
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Glad you had a relaxing weekend Darlene. Hope Monday is kind to you.

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#847097 - 11/05/12 12:16 AM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Lotus777 Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 3270
Loc: Oregon
Monday, Monday....Morning everyone. I am thinking if I don't post the night before I forget to during the day. Still immersed in pumpkins. Not hard to do but so time consuming. I also am thinking about lobbying for no more daylight savings time...don't like it at all. headscratch So glad you have found a new place, Midgie. here's looking to a swift move and no more bad landlords!! Evelyne, we have an older Lincoln and I love this car. I don't want a new one. She is white with wine colored leather seats and her name is Blanca. We have a somewhat newer Chevy PU and that is Jerry's baby. I named it BlueBoy. Did your car have a name? Or am I the only one ...? Maybe I don't want to know the answer to that. It is really past my bedtime, what with the time change so Good Night and Happy Monday ..let the Games begin. wave
_________________________
Lotus
Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.

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#847102 - 11/05/12 01:46 AM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 8112
Loc: Greece
Good morning everyone,have all a nice day happydance wave
_________________________
Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#847110 - 11/05/12 02:42 AM Re: Monday's [Re: Haroula]
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 01/08/06
Posts: 6098
Loc: Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Good morning everyone wave Coffee is on I'll keep it hot and fresh,Happy day wished for all fall
_________________________
I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.

Sue

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#847115 - 11/05/12 03:26 AM Re: Monday's [Re: cailyn]
Gimli Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 06/15/05
Posts: 2314
Loc: Switzerland
Good morning Joe earlybird, Ana, Darlene, Lotus, Haroula, Sue and everybody coming in after me wave

Joe: that is soooo early, even with a "tampered" clock. Are they paying you enough for getting up in the middle of the night? May your working hours fly by and may your leisure time double in hours.

Yankee: I would definitely go to daughters Thanksgiving feast! That's such a nice occasion to be with family.I'am sure the neighbor will be kind to the pets! Have fun!

Nan: so glad your back is better now and that you could enjoy the pea-feast with your family. Take care of your back!

Looney and Soot: it sounds a very nice get together you are heading to. I hope daughter will find a hotel room with all the pets. Maybe she could rent a camper and park it in son's backyard? Just an idea....

Anna: rah Enjoy your dance tonight! rah

Lotus: wink no, I never gave a name to this car. Would be impossible to sell it if it was so personal. When I was young(er) I had a white Volvo with tomato red leather seats (almost like yours!) and I called it: snowhite. I was driving the Volvo until she almost fell to pieces and I had to bring her to the scrap dealer. Oh may sad that was a bad time for my poor soul...

Happy day to all of you. May the sun shine on your house and in your hearts hearts

Evelyne
_________________________
"You ask me what life is. That's like asking me what a carrot is. A carrot is a carrot is a carrot" (A. Chekhov)

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#847121 - 11/05/12 05:03 AM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 5684
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Hello and goodbye. wave fall

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#847124 - 11/05/12 06:13 AM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Midge Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 04/30/00
Posts: 14746
Loc: Massachusetts
Good morning. Thanks Joe for opening again for us. Hi Ana kissy Morning Darlene. How's your beautiful daughter doing? Morning Lotus. Hi Haroula, Sue, Evelyne, venus, Gail, and all who wander in today. I have an early shift today. Then home to pack, then back to work. That will be my days until I move. Exciting,huh?

Have a happy day all.
Midgie hearts
_________________________
Just do it.

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#847129 - 11/05/12 06:37 AM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8202
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Not sure what's on the agenda for today yet. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful start to a new week. Danish and Waffles in the NC. fall
_________________________
Connie

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#847133 - 11/05/12 06:44 AM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14786
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, you're funny!

Ana, I'm sure you're going to enjoy dancing tonight.

Darlene, wishing you a wonderful day when you awake.

Lotus, enjoy whatever plans you have for the day.

Haroula, a very nice day is wished for you also.

Cailyn, I'm in desperate need of hot, fresh coffee. thanks.

Evelyne, if I didn't mention it before your pottery is awesome!

Venus have a good workday!

Midgie, so glad you found your place. You're going to be busy for awhile. Hope you'll be all settled in soon.

No school here today and tomorrow. Today is a Teacher's conference and tommorrow the school in town will be used for voting.
_________________________
Gail

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#847156 - 11/05/12 08:20 AM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
SharonB Offline
Settled Boomer

Registered: 01/23/09
Posts: 935
Loc: Delaware, USA
Good morning Joe and all Gameboomers! Hope everyone had a nice weekend. smile

It's laundry day! woot burger yay Yes, you guessed it. I'm hungry and trying to spike myself up to do laundry. It's not the laundry I mind, it's the walk in the cold. shiver

It's currently 39F here and I so hate the cold... penguin Still, got to get out there.

I hope those without power have found a way to stay warm and do laundry... sad

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#847165 - 11/05/12 09:15 AM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 13808
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Joe may work fly today! Thanks for the chuckles.

Ana have fun at dance class tonight and a good run with the dogs! 22 out there this morning.

Darlene may all go smoothly at work today!

Lotus soon the pumpkins will be done and the thought of all those pies and bars and bread.........yummmy! Enjoy!

wave Haourla, Cailyn, Gerry, venus!!Have a lovely day!

Connie hope you find something fun to do today! Thanks for the danish!

Gail hope the kids have a fun two days!! I loved school but it was always fun to have an extra day or teo off. lol Have a lovely day!

Sharon have fun with the laundry but a shame you have to go out in the cold to do it. Stay warm.

Evelyne have a lovely day! Yes I am glad the back is better too. Would be no fun walking with Sassy!! lol

No plans today.....so far.

wave
Nan


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#847170 - 11/05/12 09:42 AM Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1]
flutist Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/17/01
Posts: 11422
Loc: Kirkwood, MO USA
Good morning everyone.

What a yucky day it is. Rainy and cold. We need some sunshine. Anyone have any to spare?

Susie and Vince came over and we walked up to Ginny's. Susie brought a nice meal of barbequed pork steaks for her. She is so happy to be in her own house again.

Well, I think I am going to play something. Need to get back to Barrow Hill. Had just started it when we had to leave for Cabool. Great day for gaming, so I'm gonna go get some coffee, take a small peek at the walkthrough, then go play.

Midgie, when are you moving?

A great day to everyone.

Bets
_________________________
Corgis fill your life with Joy, your heart with Love, and your soul with Sunshine.

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