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#852642 - 11/29/12 05:20 AM Help me with these jokes. Thanks.
curly Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 07/06/03
Posts: 27192
Loc: Ottawa Ontario Canada
-1.I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah; I thought, ''He's trying to pull a f--- o--''.

-2.There's two fish in a tank, and one says ''How do you ----- this thing?''

-3.A jump-cable walks into a bar. The barman says ''I'll serve you, but don't s---- anything''

-4.Slept like a log last night........ Woke up in the f--------.

-5.The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up, I said ''Did you get my d----?''.

-6.I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can't get the c------ out of her hair.

-7.A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. ''But why?'' they asked, as they moved off. ''because,'' he said ''I can't stand c---- nuts b------- in an open f----.''

-8.Four fonts walk into a bar the barman says ''Hey - get out! We don't want your ---- in here''

9.I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a c----
t---------. It took him two hours to pass me the salt.

10.I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly c------ myself.

lol















Edited by curly (11/29/12 09:37 AM)
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Show me a man with both feet on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't put on his pants.

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#852645 - 11/29/12 05:51 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
Niki Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 10/30/11
Posts: 4624
Loc: UK
1. fast one wave
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What are we? Women - What do we want? We don't know - When do we want it? Now

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#852646 - 11/29/12 05:52 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 6904
Loc: Greece
2.Drive lol wave
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As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.





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#852651 - 11/29/12 06:13 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 16310
Loc: Marlborough USA
4. fireplace lol
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Gerry

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#852653 - 11/29/12 06:26 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
curly Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 07/06/03
Posts: 27192
Loc: Ottawa Ontario Canada
Thanks.
_________________________
Show me a man with both feet on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't put on his pants.

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#852658 - 11/29/12 06:51 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
Jema Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 09/11/02
Posts: 13002
Loc: Virginia
Hi again. catrub

7. CHESS nuts BOASTING in an open FOYER grin
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Wouldn't that jar your mustard!

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#852660 - 11/29/12 07:07 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
Cue Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 04/07/03
Posts: 11621
Loc: The Outer Limits
5. drift lol Morning Curly
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Did you ever stop to think...and then forget to start again!

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#852665 - 11/29/12 07:15 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
curly Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 07/06/03
Posts: 27192
Loc: Ottawa Ontario Canada
Good ones. Hey Cue.
_________________________
Show me a man with both feet on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't put on his pants.

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#852669 - 11/29/12 07:47 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 13757
Loc: Massachusetts
3. start

Morning curly, yay12
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Gail

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#852672 - 11/29/12 08:08 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
manxman Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/23/02
Posts: 13913
Loc: Unionville
6. cobwebs wave
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Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.

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#852679 - 11/29/12 08:35 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
curly Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 07/06/03
Posts: 27192
Loc: Ottawa Ontario Canada
Morning. Bonne réponses.
_________________________
Show me a man with both feet on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't put on his pants.

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#852680 - 11/29/12 08:44 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
Lex Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 03/07/04
Posts: 4641
Loc: Isle of Man
8. Type wink
_________________________
Life is what happens while you're making other plans.


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#852682 - 11/29/12 08:45 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
curly Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 07/06/03
Posts: 27192
Loc: Ottawa Ontario Canada
Merci. Were you away?
_________________________
Show me a man with both feet on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't put on his pants.

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#852689 - 11/29/12 09:05 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
Redz Offline
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Registered: 08/12/00
Posts: 11719
Loc: Doylestown, Pennsylvania
9. check tablecover (tablecloth) grin wave

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#852692 - 11/29/12 09:31 AM Re: Help me with these jokes. Thanks. [Re: curly]
Flo NS Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 04/11/06
Posts: 4123
Loc: Nova Scotia
10. contain

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