Dear God: It's me, the Dog - Totally Precious
#865216
01/30/13 06:13 PM
01/30/13 06:13 PM
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,054 Sun City, AZ
Barry
OP
Addicted Boomer
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OP
Addicted Boomer
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,054
Sun City, AZ
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Dear God: It's me, the Dog
Dear God: Is it on purpose that our Names are spelled the same, only in reverse?
I only wish I could have included he dog pictures that were with this.
Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?
Dear God: When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or will it be the same old story?
Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around in a car? We love a nice car ride. For example, would it be so hard to change the 'Chrysler Eagle' to the 'Chrysler Beagle'? Come on now God. Do the decent thing.
Dear God: If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?
Dear God: We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?
Dear God: Here is a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good Dog: 1. I will not eat the cat's food before he eats it or after he throws it up. 2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell. 3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar. 4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. 5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. 6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet. 7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying 'hello'. 8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table. 9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house -- not after. 10. I will not come in from outside, and immediately drag my butt across the carpet. 11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room, and lick my crotch. 12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy', so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.
P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven, may I have my testicles back
I've seen God, and his name is iPad. Let us pray yes, I do use my Hairbrush as a Microphone and Dance around in my Underwear. Thank you very much.
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