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#868736 - 02/16/13 09:53 PM Sunday's
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30061
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
"There is always one moment in childhood when the door opens and lets in the future." -- Graham Green

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


"How was your golf game, dear?" asked Jack's wife.

"Well I was hitting pretty well, but my eyesight's gotten so bad I couldn't see where the ball went."

"Well you're 75 years old now, Jack, why don't you take my brother Scott along?" suggested his wife.

"But he's 85 and doesn't even play golf anymore," protested Jack.

"But he's got perfect eyesight. He could watch your ball," his wife pointed out.

The next day Jack teed off with Scott looking on. Jack swung, and the ball disappeared down the middle of the fairway. "Do you see it?" asked Jack.

"Yup," Scott answered.

"Well, where is it?" yelled Jack, peering off into the distance.

"I can‘t remember."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THERE IS MAN AT THE PARK SITTING ON THE
BENCH CRYING.
SOMEONE ASKED, WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
HE REPLIED: I HAVE JUST MARRIED THIS BEAUTIFUL 30 YEAR
OLD GIRL, SHE IS WONDERFUL, SHE COOKS
DELICIOUS MEALS, SHE KEEPS THE HOUSE VERY
CLEAN, SEX IS GREAT!
THE MAN ASKED: SO WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
THE ELDERLY MAN ANSWERED: I FORGOT
WHERE I LIVE.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A 60-year-old man went to the doctor for a check-up. The doctor told him, "You're in terrific shape. There's nothing wrong with you. Why, you might live forever. You have the body of a 35 year old. By the way, how old was your father when he died?"

The 60 year old responded, "Who said he was dead?"

The doctor was surprised and asked, "How old is he and is he very active?"

The 60 year old responded, "Well, he is 82 years old and he still goes skiing three times a season and surfing three times a week during the summer."

The doctor couldn't believe it. "Well, how old was your grandfather when he died?"
The 60 year old responded again, "Who said he was dead?"

The doctor was astonished. He said, "You mean to tell me you are 60 years old and both your father and your grandfather are alive? Is your grandfather very active?"

The 60 year old said, "He goes skiing at least once a season and surfing once a week during the summer. Not only that," said the patient, "my grandfather is 106 years old, and next week he is getting married again."

The doctor said, "At 106 years old, why on earth would your grandfather want to get married?"

His patient looked up at the doctor and said, "Who said he wanted to?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man asked his wife, "What would you most like for your birthday?"
She said, "I'd love to be ten again."

On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a theme park. He put her on every ride in the park, the Death Slide, The Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear. Everything there was, she had a go.

She staggered out of the theme park five hours later, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Into McDonald's they went, where she was given a Double Big Mac with extra fries and a strawberry shake. Then off to a movie theater, more burgers, popcorn, cola and sweets. At last she staggered home with her husband and collapsed into bed.

Her husband leaned over and asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being ten again?"

One eye opened and she groaned, "Actually I meant dress size."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just has a fit, telling her not to dare go out like that.

The teenager tells her "Loosen up Grams. These are modern times.
You gotta let your rosebuds show!" and out she goes.

The next day the teenager comes downstairs, and the grandmother is sitting there with no top on. The teenager wants to die.

She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate.

"Loosen up, sweetie. If you can show off your rosebuds, then I can display my hanging baskets."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. wave

Wake up, sit up, cheer up, suck it up, get up up up!

You gotta wake up first though.

You can’t go walking around all day with your eyes closed you know. cool

If you do, someone is going to take advantage of you, one way or another. rolleyes

If you come in the diner like that, I’m gonna have you stand in the corner and hold a potted plant. evil

Your drool can keep it watered. snicker

Maybe I’ll stand you by the front door holding a tray of condiments. razz

This could be fun. woot

You are getting sleepy….verrry sleeeepy……….and so am I. sleep

Have a happy day everyone. yes

joe


Edited by gymcandy1 (02/16/13 09:56 PM)
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#868751 - 02/17/13 12:18 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65215
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Enjoy your day off Joe! Are you having fun with your baby brother? I hope the two of you aren't ganging up on poor sis. grin

Have a happy day everyone!

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#868762 - 02/17/13 03:33 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 7810
Loc: Greece
Good morning and have all a relaxig Sunday happydance wave
_________________________

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#868767 - 02/17/13 05:04 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 5496
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Have a great day Joe, Ana, Haroula and all who come in after me. wave It's time for yet another work whoosh. Hope everyone here has a great Sunday. winter

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#868768 - 02/17/13 05:50 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17305
Loc: Marlborough USA
wave Good morning Joe, Ana, Haroula and venus. Coffee is on. Joe enjoy you time with Baby. Ana Cailyn is having computer problem and ask me to let you know. Haroula wishing you a sunny day. Venus don't "whoosh" to hard today. Have a nice Sunday all. wave
_________________________
Gerry

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#868783 - 02/17/13 07:47 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14560
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, enjoy your day!

Ana, have fun with whatever plans you have for the day!

Haroula, wishiung you a relaxinf Sunday also.

Venus, don't work too hard. Save a little time to play.

Gerry, thanks for putting the coffee on.

Cailyn, hope your computer gets well again.

Not going to church this morning. Snowing again. Think we'll stay inside. Looks like a gaming day is in store.
_________________________
Gail

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#868793 - 02/17/13 08:29 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Space Quest Fan Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 9578
Loc: Columbus,Ohio USA
Have a great Sunday everyone.
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#868813 - 02/17/13 10:42 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
True Blue Boomer

Registered: 04/16/05
Posts: 21320
Loc: Usually up an Alabama Tree
Joe..woo hoo, enjoy your day off..your post is always the best way to start the day..hope Baby is doing well. Hi ya Ana, Haroula, WhooshinVenus, Gerry, Gail, SQF and Cailyn! Have fun gaming Gail and I hope you get your computer up and running again Cailyn.

Just grandson and I are up as the rest of the gang is still zzz'ing lol

Life is good and wish you all a relaxing Sunday.

Time for gardening and whale music .. and coffee of course wink

wave
_________________________
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games

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#868823 - 02/17/13 11:47 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 7286
Loc: San Diego, CA
Cold then hot now they are predicting cold again and rain. Wish our weather would make up its mind! Gonna make my yard kid so happy since the grass will grow and he will get $$$$$ for mowing. He comes by every few days to check. Fun for everyone.

Outdoorsies are having 'tent wars'. I have two kitty tents. Each has a 'bed' and a flat spot with a nice fluffy blankie. So the 'mom' cat has decided she gets to choose which tent she wants. She is pushing out the poor old gal (who just lost her long time friend) and I'm trying to figure out a way to solve the bullying behavior. Don't think I will be successful since they are all ferals. Can't do much with socialization but I try. Every night I go out at bedtime and lift lone old kitty into HER tent. If the 'mom' is in there she usually bolts when I approach. She was there this morning again. At least someone is comfy.

Seal pool here, which just put in a 24/7 video camera (awesome) is under siege again by protesters. Camera is great. You can watch the beach and all the seals basking in the sun and swimming and having their babies (only at night) and teaching them how to swim, etc. BUT the protesters want the seals gone so the beach will return to a 'children's pool' as it was originally planned by the donor hundreds of years ago. Always in court fighting. Well now, they captured 2 gals at night scaring the seals and hitting and kicking them and pulling their flippers and ears and jumping on them until every last seal ran for the water. It's very sparse there yesterday. Poor seals. I'm hoping someone rats out these two and they are arrested. We have 'nice protesters' who are quiet, don't annoy the seals and just remind everyone the beach is actually open to human activity if you don't approach the seals. A park ranger is stationed there watching and cautioning anyone who gets too close and it works for everyone. Hoping today to see the seals returning and not more stupid humans hurting animals.
_________________________
WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.

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#868829 - 02/17/13 12:24 PM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65215
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Off to Bed Bath and Beyond to pick up a new vacuum. Mine has been officially declared dead but it had a very good run so I cannot complain. I also have to pick up Sams wedding shower gift because her shower is next weekend.

When I get back, I will run the dogs. yay

Gerry, thanks for letting me know about Sue. sad I hope she can get it up and running soon.

Be back in a flash...
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#868835 - 02/17/13 12:57 PM Re: Sunday's [Re: BrownEyedTigre]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30061
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
Good morning everybody.....barely. wave

I've been out cleaning the back yard for the last 2+ hours. Pretty tired now. tired

It's a very nice day, and I'm not sure what I'll be doing for the rest of it. duh

Probably visiting with my Brother. thumbsup

I hope you all enjoy your Sunday very much. happydance

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#868840 - 02/17/13 01:12 PM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 13691
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Joe enjoy your day what ever else you do!! thanks for the laughs!

Ana happy shopping!!! Time seems to be flying by I see for a shower already!! Have fun! Enjoy the walk with the dogs and happy hunting to them. lol

Cailyn hope the puter is up and running soonest!

Gerry thanks for letting us know about Cailyn! Have a lovely day!

Gail more snow?? Good to stay in and just right weather for gaming.....have fun!!

Soot have fun with grandson and enjoy the music and surfing.

venus happy whooshing!!! Have fun at work.

Haroula have a lovely day! Space enjoy the rest of the weekend!

Sorta I hope the "outdoorsies" get things settled.

wave
Nan

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#868864 - 02/17/13 02:53 PM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Lotus777 Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 3270
Loc: Oregon
Good Day Boomies!! Hi Joe, Ana, Haroula, venus, Gerry, Gail, SpaceQ, Soot, Sorta, Nan and all who come after. Ana, what kind of vac are you getting? Sorry about Cailyn's 'puter problems, hope she gets things going soonest. Poor sweet Evelyne, I hope you recover quickly and that all things begin to look brighter for you. Enjoy your gaming Gail, sounds like a perfect day for it. Hope the old lady gets to sleep in tonight, Sorta. That just riles me about those horrid protesters. I hope they are caught and fined. Better yet, let Me punish them. I would even up the odds by making them swim with the seals in the raw...maybe one would get bitten in the nether regions. Punishment should fit the crime! devil Hope you are having a good day Nan!! Happy Gaming Everyone!! wave
_________________________
Lotus
Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.

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#868881 - 02/17/13 03:50 PM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65215
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Lotus, I stuck with my tried and true inexpensive Hoover Wind Tunnel bagged vacuum. I had my last one over ten years and until the plastic started getting brittle and breaking off a few months ago it was awesome. I am about to put it together and give it a whirl. yay

Nan, no great finds today except for a couple unlucky voles that Merlin took prompt care of. rotfl It's so hard to walk on the ice, I envision myself getting impaled on a broken twig. What are you up to today?

Joe, enjoy your visit. Are you happy you are back home now?

Sorta, I am not allowed to say what I want to here about the protesters but I do wish Jaws would appear and take them out in one gulp.
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#868884 - 02/17/13 04:30 PM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 7810
Loc: Greece
sleep wave
_________________________

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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