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#884981 - 05/02/13 12:38 AM Thursday's
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 29783
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
English - Who needs that? I'm never going to England!
Homer Simpson
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password: "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento"

When asked why she had such a long password, she said she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Airport Security Suggestion....


An engineer (ex-NASA project director) has what I think is
the near perfect solution for airport security!

*Here's a solution to all the controversy over full-body
scanners at the airports. Have a booth that you can step into
that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device
you may have on you.*

*It would be a win-win for everyone, and there would be none of this
[blip] about racial profiling and this method would eliminate a long
and expensive trial. Justice would be quick and swift..*

*Case Closed!*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lady: Do you drink?
Man: Yes
Lady: How much a day?
Man: Three 6 packs
Lady: How much per 6 pack
Man: about $10.00
Lady: And how long have you been drinking?
Man: 15 years
Lady: So 1 6 pack cost $10.00 and you have 3 packs a day which puts your spending each month at $900. In one year, it would be $10,800 correct?
Man: Correct
Lady: If in 1 year you spend $10,800 not accounting for inflation, the past 15 years puts your spending at $162,000 correct?
Man: Correct
Lady: Do you know that if you hadn't drank, that money could have been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 15 years, you could have now bought a Ferrari?
Man: Do you drink?
Lady: No
Man: Where's your Ferrari then?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. Why can't men get mad cow disease?

A. Because they're pigs.

At twenty we worry about what others think of us.

At forty we don't care about what others think of us.

At sixty we discover they haven't been thinking about us at all.

***********************

A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store. The store
clerks called 911 when they saw him collapse to the floor. The paramedics
rushed the man to the nearest hospital where he had emergency open heart
bypass surgery.

He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at the
Catholic Hospital he was taken to. A nun was seated next to his bed holding
a clip board loaded with several forms, and a pen. She asked him how he was
going to pay for his treatment.

"Do you have health insurance?" she asked.

He replied in a raspy voice, "No health insurance."

The nun asked, "Do you have money in the bank?"

He replied, "No money in the bank."

"Do you have a relative who could help you with the payments?" asked the
irritated nun.

He said, "I only have a spinster sister, and she is a nun."

The nun became agitated and announced loudly, "Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns
are married to God."

The patient replied, "Perfect. Send the bill to my brother-in-law."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain."

"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back."

"But, officer, I just wanted to say,..."

"And I said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!"

A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."

"Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I'm the groom."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. welcome

It's a new day's diner. Yahoo! yay

Come one, come all & we'll all have a ball. dance

I'll cook, you eat, the cuisine here is a real treat. thumbsup

As you go about your day, keep a smiling all the way. grin

If you're working then get to it, if you've chores for Pete's sake do it. razz

Need some help? Give me a call, I'll hang "help wanted" on the wall. lol

Now I'm off to bed...... think....cause I'm a sleepy head.

Have a happy day everyone.

joe


Edited by BrownEyedTigre (05/02/13 10:15 AM)
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#884987 - 05/02/13 01:09 AM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 6893
Loc: Greece
rotflJoe,good morning everyone.
We had such a fun yesterday happydance
Time for church see you later wave
Have all a happy day spring
_________________________
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.





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#885003 - 05/02/13 05:38 AM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 16297
Loc: Marlborough USA
wave Good Morning Joe and Haroula. Joe keep smiling! grin Haroula enjoy your day. yes Cailyn I put the coffee on! Happy Day All! wave
_________________________
Gerry

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#885008 - 05/02/13 06:23 AM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 7807
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Sis is here. To all here and all who follow, have a Super Thursday. Danish, Omelets, and French Toast in the NC. spring
_________________________
Connie

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#885029 - 05/02/13 07:44 AM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 13752
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, loved the jokes!

Haroula, Enjoy church.

Gerry, thanks for the coffee.

Connie, have a great day with your Sis.


Cailyn, have a good day when you come in.

Nan, how's your weather? It's been a crazy year hasn't it?

Ana, good day is wished for you when you come in.

To all who are not awake as yet I'm wishing a wonderful day!

Will go for a nice long walk with the dogs after all the housework is done.
_________________________
Gail

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#885043 - 05/02/13 08:42 AM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
True Blue Boomer

Registered: 04/16/05
Posts: 20586
Loc: Usually up an Alabama Tree
Good morning Joe Haroula Gerry Connie and Gail. Happy Thursday to you and the rest of the gang.

Have fun with Sis Connie

Enjoy your walk Gail

Now that I have my coffee and an omelet from the NC I am ready to tackle the day thumbsup

Take care everyone!

Whoosh...

hearts L4L

wave
_________________________
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games

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#885052 - 05/02/13 10:03 AM Re: Thursday's [Re: soot]
Darlene Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 9144
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Hope your day is easy peasy!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

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#885059 - 05/02/13 10:34 AM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Online   content
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 41474
Loc: Alabama
Thumping good Thursday ya'll puppy

It's another grey day here but I think I can beat the rain to the park if I don't linger over my coffee too long, or pick up my book. I'm reading the Farseer Triology by Robin Hobb. Holy moly it's absorbing. I kept "just one more" chaptering way too late. Normally I get sleepy and realize I don't remember what I just read, but not last night. Just downloaded the 3rd book so must resist temptation til I get some things accomplished.

Daughter is coming in next week for a visit. So that means cleaning and meal planning must happen. It is very bad timing as far as being able to run around as a family and have fun as hubby is in his busy time at work and can't take time off right now.

Anyone heading out to Ironman 3 tomorrow?
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#885064 - 05/02/13 11:28 AM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Online   happy
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 63345
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Good morning boomies! How are you all on this fine day? The sun is shining but the rain is coming because my head is letting me know. It's never wrong. lol

Joe, I have an arm's long list of chores, can you post it for me and send help? grin Great rhymes you had going!

Haroula, glad you had a great day, I hope today is just as fun.

Gerry, is your knee doing better?

Connie, have fun with your sis!

Gail, have a great walk. How are you feeling?

soot, hope work goes well!

Darlene, almost to the weekend!

L4L, I hope you have fun with daughter next week. Is she bringing the dogs?

Nan, how are you doing today? I hope you aren't hurting now that the numbing is gone. hearts

Today is a major corner day. Party is over for me.
_________________________
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

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#885076 - 05/02/13 12:52 PM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Online   content
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 41474
Loc: Alabama
Awww Ana, hope you are liberated soon.

Daughter will bring the Newfie and the Dane but leave Miss Annie with her room mate. Daughter is also dog sitting (cos having 6 dogs in one small house is not enough) for a pit bull, but I'm devoutly praying she will not bring him. She keeps saying he is a sweet dog, and I know many pits are, but the last time we had one of her "sweet" pits in the house, he attacked everything that moved except hubby and I. We have talked about it, so I'm sure Mick will stay in Ohio. wave

We are waiting on rain also. Son is off and had planned to do errands today. We shall see how bad the weather turns.

I have bank statements to reconcile so that's the corner I will be in. puppy
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#885077 - 05/02/13 01:00 PM Re: Thursday's [Re: BrownEyedTigre]
SharonB Offline
Settled Boomer

Registered: 01/23/09
Posts: 934
Loc: Delaware, USA
Hello! Enjoying my Thursday. Counting down my days still. 11 more for final discharge. They are allowing me to go home for a brief visit next Thursday. I'll be able to see my cat, check my mail, etc. I can't wait!

Hope all is well with all of you. I will be gaming for a while and hope you will too.

Sharon catrub

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#885090 - 05/02/13 01:35 PM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Lotus777 Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 3270
Loc: Oregon
Good Morning!! It is another fabulous day here. Windy for about the past week but nice and today?? Heavenly!
Hope you have a great day Joe.
Is it still hot Haroula?
Hi Gerry and Connie, hope you are having a nice day!!
Hi Gail, now I'm curious also as to how many dogs you have and what kinds??
Hope your work days are good ones Soot and Darlene!!
Don't work too hard L4L. I'm afraid if hubby didn't keep me in line....oh that sounds baaad!, I would have six dogs or more, just like your daughter!
Hi Sharon, I'm getting excited for you too. Not much longer and I bet your reunion with kitty will be wonderful!!!
I am off to play in the dirt so to all who come later and to all here before have a fantastic day and Happy Gaming!!! wave

EDIT: Too much pollen in my brain. Ana!! I hope you had a restful night and don't work too hard in that corner. And not head aches, please. Hugs to you!!


Edited by looney4labs (05/02/13 02:02 PM)
Edit Reason: removed large empty space
_________________________
Lotus
Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.

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#885096 - 05/02/13 02:06 PM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Online   content
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 41474
Loc: Alabama
Sharon, how are you feeling? Stronger?

Lotus, I know. I have the same problem. Hubby started saying repeatedly "The ark is full, the ark is full" when we got to 5 dogs and 6 cats courtesy of daughter. Have fun in the dirt!
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#885109 - 05/02/13 03:06 PM Re: Thursday's [Re: looney4labs]
Gimli Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 06/15/05
Posts: 2309
Loc: Switzerland
hearts good morning and afternoon and evening Boomies, this is a flyby to tell you: carpe diem!

See you tomorrow again. LOVE

Evelyne
_________________________
"You ask me what life is. That's like asking me what a carrot is. A carrot is a carrot is a carrot" (A. Chekhov)

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#885128 - 05/02/13 04:10 PM Re: Thursday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 6893
Loc: Greece
Hot,hot,hot, I think we skip Spring and we go straight for Summer 33C.
yes happydance
_________________________
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.





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