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#887064 - 05/11/13 11:24 PM Sunday's
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30109
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
"After three days men grow weary of a wench, a guest, and rainy weather."
Benjamin Franklin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together, they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother. The first said, "I built a big house for our mother." The second said, "I sent her a Mercedes with a driver." The third smiled and said, "I've got you both beat. You remember how mom enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know she can't see very well. So I sent her a remarkable parrot that recites the entire Bible. It took elders in the church 12 years to teach him. He's one of a kind. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot recites it."

Soon thereafter, mom sent out her letters of thanks: "Milton," she wrote one son, "The house you built is so huge. I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house."

"Gerald," she wrote to another, "I am too old to travel. I stay most of the time at home, so I rarely use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude!"

"Dearest Donald," she wrote to her third son, "You have the good sense to know what your mother likes. The chicken was delicious."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, “Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?” The first man approached him and said, “Sir, I don’t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?” The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, “My wife’s first husband.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two hunters are in the woods in deer season. The morning hunt over, they head back to camp together. As they make their way along the path, they hear a loud crashing noise and look up to see a very large bear charging down a hillside. Realizing simultaneously, that they are the bear's intended targets, not to mention lunch, one of the hunters immediately takes off his back pack, drops to the ground and begins to change from his hunting boots to tennis shoes. The other hunter bewildered asks "You don't really think you can out run that bear do you?" The first hunter replies, "No, but I can outrun you."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother. The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight: the mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her. The wife cried, "What are we going to do?" "Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~

There was 3 guys stranded in the mountains and they weren't going to be rescued for 3 days. So they all made a plan that each night one would get the food. So the first night the 1st guy goes out and comes back with a big deer. So the guy who was hunting tomorrow ask for advice on how to catch another one, and the guy said see tracks, follow tracks, BAM!! shot the deer... So the next night the 2nd guy went out and came back with an even bigger deer than the 1st guys, and the 3rd guy was amazed so he asked how he could catch one like that for the next night. And the guy told him see tracks, follow tracks, BAM!! shot the deer... The next night the 3rd guy went out to get a deer and comes back hours later all beat up and bloody, so the the other 2 guys ask what happen. And the guy said i seen tracks, followed tracks, BAM!! got hit by train.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A couple of Oklahoma hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps to the operator, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator, in a calm soothing voice says, "Just take it easy. I can help. First, lets make sure he's dead."

... There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says, "OK, now what?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the police station, Bubba explained to the police officer why his cousins shot him. "Well," Bubba began, "We wuz havin' a good time drinking, when my cousin Ray picked up his shotgun and said, 'Hey, der ya fellows wanna go hunting?'" "And then what happened?" the officer interrupted. "From what I remember," Bubba said, "I stood up and said, 'Sure, I'm game.'"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Happy Heathen Day everyboomie! welcome

Ok Ok, "Happy Sunday Day" then, and a very HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!! to all Mothers. flowers

Now, what wuz I gunna talk about?

At 10:30 at night I'm not really leaning towards very long openers.

I'm rather leaning towards the bedroom actually. tired

I'm almost horizontal, I'm leaning so much.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

What's that buzzing noise? razz

I thought I would get the diner started, and then go do some gaming, but I started the post about a half hour ago, and I have a bald spot on my head now from scratching my noggin so much. headscratch

I may not have a hair left by the time I finish it.

On the bright side I don't have to cut my hair anymore.

On the other side....well .....It's bright too because of the glare of the sun.

I guess I don't have to worry because it'll be all-bright. thumbsup

Nobody can ever call me Harry either.

They don't call me Harry now though.

Why would they, I'm not Harry?

I'm Confused......and tired. crazy

Have a harry, happy day everyboomie. rah

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#887066 - 05/11/13 11:40 PM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
MaG Offline
Administrator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 12/28/99
Posts: 66135
Joe,
I can get you a toupee. Would you like that?


mother Everyone!

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#887068 - 05/11/13 11:51 PM Re: Sunday's [Re: MaG]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30109
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
Oh yes MaG thank you! kissy

Make it a blue one please to go with my eyes. wink

I never know when I may start dating a Smurf. headscratch

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#887071 - 05/12/13 12:04 AM Mother's Day [Re: gymcandy1]
aserID Offline
Settled Boomer

Registered: 09/20/12
Posts: 144
Loc: United States
For all of you who still have
your moms-- consider yourselves
lucky. Give your mom a big, tight
hug for Mother's Day and tell her
how much you love her. I always did,
and I miss her more than you know.

Love you, everybody!

Aser wave




Edited by aserID (05/12/13 12:38 AM)

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#887081 - 05/12/13 02:15 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 7976
Loc: Greece
Good morning boomers,have all a happy mother wave
_________________________
Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#887086 - 05/12/13 02:48 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65509
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Have a happy day everyone!
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#887087 - 05/12/13 03:18 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: BrownEyedTigre]
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 01/08/06
Posts: 6074
Loc: Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Good morning Joe,MaG,Ana,assir,Haroula,and all who follow me in wave I'll get the coffee ready, mother to all the mothers here at Gameboomers mother
_________________________
I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.

Sue

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#887095 - 05/12/13 05:03 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Online   happy
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17473
Loc: Marlborough USA
mother Good Morning Joe, MaG, Aser, Haroula, Ana, Cailyn and all my Boomer friends. All you Moms out there enjoy a Happy Mothers Day! mother
_________________________
Gerry

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#887107 - 05/12/13 06:07 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Midge Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 04/30/00
Posts: 14714
Loc: Massachusetts
mother to all the mothers out there. I have a split shift. Between shifts I'll be with Rob, Jen, my grandchildren and Ritzie (their black lab)adorable dog.

Midgie mother hearts
_________________________
Just do it.

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#887110 - 05/12/13 06:30 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8162
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Happy Mother's day to all our Boomer mothers. The transformer on the power pole in our back yard went crazy and blew it's fuses yesterday. Sparks where shooting everywhere, and we were without power for quite awhile. Breakfast out this morning. To all here and all who follow, have a Great Sunday. Danish, Pancakes, Bacon and Eggs, Hash Browns, and Toast in the NC. mother
_________________________
Connie

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#887115 - 05/12/13 07:26 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14696
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

To Mothers everywhere. mother
_________________________
Gail

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#887130 - 05/12/13 08:17 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: GBC]
Space Quest Fan Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 9646
Loc: Columbus,Ohio USA
I hope all the Boomers moms have a very mother smile


Edited by Space Quest Fan (05/12/13 08:18 AM)
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#887156 - 05/12/13 10:13 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: Space Quest Fan]
Darlene Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 9442
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Happy Sunday tooooooo yoooouuuu!

mother To all Mums!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Volunteering at church this morning, then an easy peasy day!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

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#887166 - 05/12/13 11:12 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
Lotus777 Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 3270
Loc: Oregon
motherto all of the Mothers here. We are off to brunch with our Mums. Wishing all a lovely day and Happy Gaming!! wave
_________________________
Lotus
Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.

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#887172 - 05/12/13 11:17 AM Re: Sunday's [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 42516
Loc: Alabama
Daughter on her way back to Ohio. Boys are waiting for mom, and I'm gonna take coffee and go lie down for a bit. mother
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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