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#891552 - 06/01/13 11:14 PM Sip-&-Surf Sunday
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 32193
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
If your parents never had children, chances are... neither will you.
- Dick Cavett



A repeat offender got a life sentence for a small-time shoplifting caper in Jupiter, Florida. The man stole $49.73 worth of boxer shorts, panties, a sports bra and some cigarette lighters from a Wal-Mart store. His fatal mistake was flashing a knife at a security guard -- which turned his petty theft into a felony. Since the man had been released from prison less than three years ago, Florida's repeat offender law required the judge to send him away for life without the possibility of parole.


An unemployed sanitation worker in Miami is also facing life in prison -- for shooting himself in the privates. In a drunken stupor, the man reached for a pistol he had hidden in his pants. The gun went off, and the bullet struck the man in the... nuggets. At first, he told officers someone else had shot him, but changed his story after paramedics found the shell casing in his underwear. Cops ruled the shooting accidental, but the man was charged with a concealed weapons violation and possession of a firearm by a convicted felon. The maximum sentence for those crimes is normally 15 years but, because the man has a record as a violent career criminal, a Miami prosecutor is asking the judge to send him away for life. The man's public defender calls that "ridiculous," and says the man's injury is punishment enough.


A luckless thief pleaded guilty to the attempted robbery of a convenience store in Detroit Lakes, Minnesota. The thief told a passereby he was going to rob the store, gave the man a dollar, and asked him to go inside and buy a scarf to hide his identity during the crime. The bystander took the dollar, went inside the store... and called the police.


A thief in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina has learned a valuable lesson: if you're going to steal restaurant equipment, be sure to remove pictures of the original owner's grandchildren before setting the stuff up in your own restaurant. John Ubbing, owner of Giovanni's Pizzeria in Calabash, North Carolina, lost an assortment of pizza-making equipment in a March robbery. A refrigerator stolen in the heist later turned up inside the Myrtle Beach restaurant -- where cops found pictures of Ubbing's grandchildren still stuck to the side of it. The owner of the second restaurant was arrested.


During a high school break-in in Plymouth, North Carolina, two burglars found a camera in one of the classrooms and amused themselves by taking pictures of each other committing the crime. When they couldn't figure out how to get the film out of the camera, they concluded it wasn't loaded and left it behind. The men apparently didn't realize they'd been fooling around with a digital camera that stores pictures on a computer disk. Investigators downloaded the snapshots to a computer and got a complete photographic record of the break-in. The suspects were quickly arrested.


A Nevada fugitive wanted on fraud charges was arrested in Connecticut after he blew his cover by applying for a job... as a police officer. The Connecticut cops discovered the man's fugitive status during a standard background check. He had passed both the written and agility tests before being found out. Police called the man in to headquarters under the guise of getting his fingerprints, and served him with an arrest warrant instead.


Admitting his 0-4 record is not impressive "on paper," trainers announced that Lucky, a German shepherd guide dog for the blind in Wuppertal, Germany, is available for his fifth owner. Lucky led his first owner in front of a bus, killing him. Then he led the second off the end of a pier, drowning him. He nudged his third owner off a railway platform in front of an express train, killing him. And he walked his fourth owner into heavy traffic, abandoning him to be hit and killed. The new owner won't be told of Lucky's record -- the trainers say the dog might sense nervousness "and do something silly."


10. You ticked him off once and your next phone bill was $20,000.

9. He's won the Publisher's Clearing House sweepstakes three years running.

8. When asked for his phone number, he gives it in hex.

7. Seems strangely calm whenever the office LAN goes down.

6. Somehow he/she gets HBO on his PC at work.

5. Mumbled, "Oh, puh-leeez" 95 times during the movie "The Net"

4. Massive RRSP contribution made in half-cent increments.

3. Video dating profile lists "public-key encryption" among turn-ons

2. When his computer starts up, you hear, "Good Morning, Mr. President."

1. You hear him murmur, "Let's see you use that Visa card now, jerk."


"The handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."

"If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

"So, you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

"Yes sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

"Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

"The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or dog?"

"Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

"Life's tough, it's tougher if you're stupid."

"No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

"Just how big were those two beers?

"In God we trust, all others are suspects."

Good morning everyboomie. welcome

Welcome to your sippin, surfin, sunny Sunday diner. yay

Well, it's sunny here. I hope it is where you are as well. thumbsup

"Let the sunshine in. The sunshine in."

Actually I prefer yesterday's cool cloudiness.

I hate the heat, hate the humidity, hate Summer. It really burns me up. mad

It's so sunny here, I haven't even gone to bed yet, and I feel the sun coming back already.

Summer time makes me miserable, or Le Miserable as they say in France. Oui! wink

I just thank the good Lord that I have so many friends here to share my misery with. lol

No I'm grin

Have a happy day everyone of yous.


Edited by gymcandy1 (06/01/13 11:16 PM)
There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats

#891556 - 06/01/13 11:39 PM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 75359
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
I think that Nan would gladly take some of your heat Joe. lol Blow some her way! It's a little chilly here right now and back to the 40's tomorrow night. Good sleeping weather.

Today is Insanity late morning and then back to the corner. Life is good...

Have a happy day everyone!
Don't feed the Trolls

#891575 - 06/02/13 03:18 AM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 10027
Loc: Greece
Good morning Joe,Ana and all who follow later wave
Have a nice and relax Sunday. dance
I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

#891580 - 06/02/13 04:02 AM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: Haroula]
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 01/08/06
Posts: 6145
Loc: Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Good morning Joe,Ana,Haroula waveTaking a trip to New Hampshire today to do a little shopping!Coffee is ready! Hope everyone has a great day puppy
I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.


#891581 - 06/02/13 04:32 AM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
True Blue Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 22792
Loc: Marlborough USA
spring Good Morning Joe, Ana, Haroula and Cailyn. Joe maybe a little hunting today? Ana hope you get some down time. Haroula looks like a beach day for you. Cailyn have a fun time shopping in NH! Happy Day wiahed for All! spring

#891590 - 06/02/13 06:20 AM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 10256
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Breakfast out and a little shopping after. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Sunday. Bacon, Eggs, Home Fries, Toast, Danish, and Cinnamon Buns in the NC. spring

#891601 - 06/02/13 07:25 AM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 18262
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, just getting over a heat wave in the 90's here. Today it's cooling off to the 80's.

Ana, wishing you an easy time in the corner.

Haroula, happy day!

Cailyn, enjoy your trip to NH.

Gerry, enjoy the day!

Connie, enjoy breakfast out and shopping. Danish sounds great with my coffee.

Church this morning. 80's weather here today. Glad the 90's are gone.

#891626 - 06/02/13 10:07 AM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: GBC]
manxman Offline
True Blue Boomer

Registered: 07/23/02
Posts: 21394
Loc: Unionville
Good morning everyone wave Time to go do the weekly grocery shopping smile
Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.

#891629 - 06/02/13 10:18 AM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: manxman]
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 15321
Loc: Upper Arlington, Ohio
Have a great Sunday everyone. smile
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

#891630 - 06/02/13 10:19 AM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 14623
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Yes, Joe please!! It is a nice 50F out there right now and I am heading to the beach of Lake Superior for my great-grandsons dedication!!! Hope the wind don't blow in off the lake.

Thanks for the laughs and may work fly so you can get started on your weekend!!

Ana have fun at class and may the corner move right along and be kind.

Cailyn prayers for the Band around you as you travel. Have fun!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Gerry have a nice walk and a lovely day!

Gail enjoy church!! Have a lovely day!

Connie have a nice walk and a good breakfast. Thanks for the danish!

Manxman have a lovely day!

Have a lovely day everybody!!


#891662 - 06/02/13 11:54 AM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Online   content
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 47571
Loc: Alabama
Super Sunday ya'll puppy

Hubby and I are back from our visit to daughter in Ohio. It was a very busy few days but lots of fun. Quite a lot needs to be taken care of today, but first, sit and sip and surf! I haven't even smelled a computer since last Tuesday. rotfl

Nan, hope the dedication is wonderful! How many greats do you have?

Just a note for you dog owners out there. We discovered the hard way that corn cobs can be very dangerous for dogs if they eat them. The vet told us that even when they chew them into small pieces, they tend to cling to the intestinal tract and can cause a complete blockage. Who knew?

Back in a bit wave
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

#891675 - 06/02/13 01:02 PM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: looney4labs]
Darlene Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 10371
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers and I hope you have a happy day as well!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!
Woohoo and booyah! smile Have an easy peasy day!

#891698 - 06/02/13 02:01 PM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Online   content
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 47571
Loc: Alabama
Happy skooshing, Darlene wave

People and animals fed. Now it's time to unpack and start some laundry. Soot and I will go monkey walking as soon as the laundry is set. We'll have to take water and take some breaks but I Need to walk. Too much time in the car lately puppy

Then out to the store to get a few fresh things, followed by more laundry I'm sure.
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

#891703 - 06/02/13 02:27 PM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: looney4labs]
Gimli Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 06/15/05
Posts: 2315
Loc: Switzerland
Hi my Buddies,

this is another flyby (with a bad conscience). Since my solo exhibition starts Tuesday and tomorrow is "equipping the gallery"-day, I have sooooo much work to do still. One always thinks: "oh, I still have a lot of time" and then-whoosh-time is over...

Can you understand? duh

I don't crazy

I hope you all are in good mood and shape. Keep the smilies coming...

Happy Sunday from rainy Switzerland

"You ask me what life is. That's like asking me what a carrot is. A carrot is a carrot is a carrot" (A. Chekhov)

#891705 - 06/02/13 02:33 PM Re: Sip-&-Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 75359
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
After a rotten work morning where I made a made a horrible mess of things rotfl I got out my frustrations in a great Insanity class. It was double fun because a bunch of my old Zumba buddies were there even though 3 of the four left after 15 minutes. lol

I have to stay in the corner the rest of the day and fix my mess. shame

Have a happy happy day! Life is good.
Don't feed the Trolls

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