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#907874 - 08/14/13 10:45 PM Thump Day
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 30109
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
I’ve decided that the key to happiness is low expectations.
Laura Moncur (1969 - ), Merriton, 06-04-08
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Funny Bumper Stickers

I killed a 6-pack just to watch it die

My car's not a tree hugger, I'm drunk you idiot!

Rehab is for Quitters

I may be drunk, but you are down right ugly, and I shall be sober in the morning

An Irishman is not drunk so long as he can hold on to one blade of grass and not fall off the earth.

Milk sucks, got beer?

1 Tequila 2 Tequila 3 Tequila Floor

A cat by any other name is still a furry little hairball that poops behind the couch.

If my dog had a face as ugly as your's, I would shave his butt and teach him to walk backwards!

I need someone really bad, are you really bad?

I used to wonder why God made ugly people, then I realized it was so people like me could get a good laugh.

Firefighters: we find them hot, and leave them wet!

This truck has been in 15 accidents...and hasn't lost one yet..

Someday your prince will come. Mine got lost took a wrong turn and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

Your lucky number is 32345543423225. Watch for it everywhere.

I tried to snort coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.

So many stupid people, So few comets

If a couple divorce in Kentucky, are they still brother and sister?

Go ahead and honk. I'm reloading.

So many stupid people, not enough bullets in a clip.

It's been lovely, but I have to scream now.

Moody witch seeks nice guy for love-hate relationship

If you say one more word, I'm going to put my umbrella in your pants and open it.

Happiness is seeing your mother-in-law's face on the back of a milk carton.

Die Yuppie Scum.

Bad cop...no donut.

The light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train.

Dislexics of the world... UNTIE!!

Where There's A Whip, There's A Way.

The best way to change someone's mind is with a rock

When blondes have more fun, do they know it?

Guns are no more responsible for killing people than the spoon is responsible for making Rosie O'Donnell fat.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Top Signs You Have A Drinking Problem

1 You lose arguments with inanimate
objects.
2 You have to hold onto the lawn to keep
from falling off the earth
3 Job interfering with your drinking.
4 Your doctor finds traces of blood in
your alcohol stream.
5 Career won't progress beyond Senator
from Massachusettes.
6 The back of your head keeps getting hit
by the toilet seat.
7 Sincerely believe alcohol to be the
elusive 5th food group.
8 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case -
coincidence?? - I think not!
9 Two hands and just one mouth... - now
THAT'S a drinking problem!
10 "Norm!" is what they say when you
enter the bar.
11 When you can focus better with one eye
closed
12 The parking lot seems to have moved
while you were in the bar
13 Every woman you see has an exact twin.
14 You wake up to find Windows 95
installed on your machine.
15 If you keep asking your wife "where
are the kids?", but you don't really have
a wife and you're talking to the
refridgerator.
16 You fall off the floor.
17 You discover in the morning liquid
cleaning supplies have disappeared.
18 Your twin sons are named Barley and
Hops.
19 Had "Spuds McKenzie" tattoo removed,
replaced it with "Red Dog."
20 Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories
as a burger, screw dinner!
21 Beer: it's not just for breakfast
anymore.
22 The glass keeps missing your mouth.
23 Bill Clinton starts to make sense.
24 When you go to donate blood and they
ask what proof?
25 Vampires get woozy after biting you.
26 The only drinking problem is not
having a drink right now.
27 At AA meeting you begin: "Hi, my name
is... uh..."
28 Your idea of cutting back is less
seltzer.
29 When vomiting becomes a relief.
30 Having a hard time staying on the side
walk - left, right, stumble, fall
31 You wake up in the bedroom, your
underwear is in the bathroom.
32 Barney, that dinosaur is damned funny!
33 You think, Four Basic Food Groups are
Caffeine, Nicotine, Alcohol, and Women.
34 Every night you're beginning to find
your roomate's cat more attractive.
35 Hi ocifer. I'm not under the affluence
of incohol.
36 Waking up with a traffic cone between
your legs.
37 No ocifer, I'm not drunk... you're
just sober...
38 Problem? I Drink, I get Drunk, I Fall
down....No Problem
39 If on a diet, you cut back your food
calories to allow for alcohol calories.
40 Take me drunk, I'm home!
41 The bottle's empty...that's the
problem!
42 Find yourself as the captain for the
Exxon Valdez.
43 You wake up naked lying in the corner
of a bus depot.
44 Roseanne looks good
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. wave

A nuther one bites the dust. bravo

Hopefully they all will before I do. slapforehead

I'm ready for retirement I think.

My bird, and my dog have been retired for a long time, and I need to join them. sherlock

Waiting for my sister to offer to support me is wearing my patience thin. rotfl

She's trying to win the lottery. The only problem is she never buys a ticket. crazy

Her dream is that a handsome guy will give her a winning ticket. slapforehead

My dream is that a handsome guy will come along and make me a happy man, and take my sister away. dance

Have a happy day everyone.

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#907877 - 08/14/13 11:02 PM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65509
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
lol Joe, I too want to win the lottery but don't buy them because I hate wasting money on them.

Have a wonderful day Joe and all! hearts

I'll be in the corner except for a run with the dogs.

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#907883 - 08/14/13 11:14 PM Re: Thump Day [Re: BrownEyedTigre]
manxman Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 07/23/02
Posts: 15538
Loc: Unionville
Good morning Joe and Ana and all boomers to follow. Happy Thursday everyone wave
_________________________
Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.

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#907886 - 08/14/13 11:32 PM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 65509
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Good morning manxman!

Ana wave
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#907896 - 08/15/13 02:17 AM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 7976
Loc: Greece
Good morning Joe, Ana, manxman and all. wave
Today is a nanional holiday here so everything is close. yes
Have all a nice and happy day. happydance
_________________________
Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#907913 - 08/15/13 05:15 AM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17477
Loc: Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana, manxman, and haroula. Coffee is on cailyn. Wishing everyone a nice day! wave
_________________________
Gerry

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#907919 - 08/15/13 07:00 AM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8165
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Thump day. Danish, Waffles, and Bacon Sandwiches in the NC. summer
_________________________
Connie

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#907924 - 08/15/13 07:27 AM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Online   content
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14698
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, be nice to your sister. She may share her lottery winnings with you one day.

Ana, hope the corner goes easy for you today.

Haroula, happy holiday to you.

Manxman, good morning.

Gerry, chilly this morning. Need coffee!

Connie, send some of your heat North.

Good day Boomers! Chilly here this morning but supposed to warm up to the 70's. Dog walk this morning then some Gaming. grin
_________________________
Gail

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#907956 - 08/15/13 10:00 AM Re: Thump Day [Re: GBC]
Darlene Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 9442
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Have a happy Thump Day!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Weekend's almost here! woot

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

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#907960 - 08/15/13 10:56 AM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
flutist Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/17/01
Posts: 11418
Loc: Kirkwood, MO USA
Good morning to everyone.

What a beautiful day. High in the mid 70's. What more can you ask for?

Just got back from taking Cory for his walk. A quiet day, nothing much going on so I am going to just wing it. Whatever will be, will be. Ah, the life of retirement.

Guess I'll go play a little, then get on the treadmill. I have managed to lose the weight I gained on vacation. Only gained between 3 1/2 and 4 pounds. Not bad. Would like to lose a couple more pounds.

Have a happy day everyone.

Hugs to all, Bets
_________________________
Corgis fill your life with Joy, your heart with Love, and your soul with Sunshine.

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#907962 - 08/15/13 11:10 AM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 13751
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Joe thanks for teh laughs this morning!! This is it....tomorrow off!!! Hope you enjoy it!!

Ana you can't win if you don't get a ticket. lol Hope the project is moving right along for you! Have a lovely walk with the dogs.

Haroula enjoy the holiday!!

Have a lovely day Manxman!

Gerry thanks for starting the coffee!! Have a lovely day!

Connie thanks for the danish and enjoy the day!

Gail enjoy the walk with the dogs and the gaming. Was a cool 49 this morning and heading to 78 for a high. Should be a nice day!

Darlene may work all go smoothly today!! Have a lovely day!

Bets congrats on the loss of weight!! Good luck with the remander you want to drop!!

wave
Nan

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#907971 - 08/15/13 12:22 PM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 7353
Loc: San Diego, CA
Running out of cat food. The Raccoons must be raiding the leftovers at night again. I can tell when all the dishes are licked clean instead of having something left for the early riser outdoories. I'll have to remember to record the evening and see if it's Mom and babies, or just Mom, or just babies, OR maybe some new critters arriving. Have no idea who it is.

Off to buy cat food.
_________________________
WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.

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#907976 - 08/15/13 12:55 PM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
Lotus777 Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 03/12/06
Posts: 3270
Loc: Oregon
Just a fast hello. I miss being here every day but don't always seem to have the time! Took my Mum to have a perm a couple of days ago and it is a frizzy mess now. I don't know a thing about such. Should she set it every night? Got my hair cut so I just have to shake my head a few times and it curls right up and off I go...still wish it were straight! Going to put new boat in the water today just to test things. I guess it won't come off the trailer yet. Can't wait to go out on her. She is called The White Pearl...oh yeah, we are looking for Captain Jack, lol!! Have more peas to harvest and put up and lettuce is giving us some great salads. Tomatoes are now beginning to ripen...slowest garden year I ever saw. One cucumber vine has outdone itself so I hope to get a jar of refrigerator pickles out of it later today. I am off in a cloud of mist as that is what it is doing outside.. Wishing everyone here and those to come a great day and Happy Gaming!! wave
_________________________
Lotus
Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.

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#907979 - 08/15/13 01:23 PM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 42516
Loc: Alabama
Thumping Good Thursday ya'll puppy

I've been up for awhile but working working working. I have gotten a lot done and have more to do, but decided to take a watermelon break and come down and chomp and surf for a sec.



Ha, Joe, I'm with your sister, but my dream is that I will be walking down the street and the ticket will blow to me, or perhaps I will find it in my shorts pocket or under my pillow whistle


Ana, may the corner be fast and easy and the run be long and fun!

Morning Manxman wave

Haroula, are you guys celebrating since everything is closed?

Gerry, wave

Connie, I hope there is at least one bacon sandwich left. thanks

Gail, have fun. I'd like some 70's during the day. This summer sure has passed quickly.

Happy Skooshing, Darlene.

Bets, have fun.

Nan, what's on your agenda today?

Sorta, you need a critter cam to keep track. You could stream it on the net.

Lotus, sounds like good eating at your place. I have the straightest hair on the planet. I will trade you for your curls. I have shake and go hair too..I wash it and then back it goes to a pony tale and that is it.


Washer beeping...time to switch.

edit: Back....bread rising, laundry folded, put away and more running. Time to sit for a bit so I'll have energy to good dinner....puppy


Edited by looney4labs (08/15/13 03:30 PM)
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#908008 - 08/15/13 04:31 PM Re: Thump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
Space Quest Fan Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 9646
Loc: Columbus,Ohio USA
Good afternoon Boomers!
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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