-1.William Shakespeare walks into a bar one day, and the bartender says to him "Hey, you can't come in here;
-2.What do you give a cannibal who is late for dinner?
--e c--- ------e-.
3.Several years ago, the State of Missouri was looking for something to replace their "Show me State" motto.
Their tourist agency came up with "M------- ---es c------"
-4.How can you help a starving cannibal?
---e him a ----!
5.Bob entered the barbershop and said emphatically to the
barber,"I want my hair cut so that it's long here,here,
here,and here, sort of wavy in this section but straight
just below,sort of spiked on this diagonal with a slanted
taper,and bald patches here,here,here,and here. I want my
hair so ugly that every female who sees me nearly passes
The barber looked at him and said,"I don't think I can
"Why not?"asked Bob. "You --- it --e l--- t--e I --- -e-e!"
-6.A famous Viking explorer returned home from a voyage and found his name missing from the town register. His wife insisted on complaining to the local civic official who apologized profusely saying, "I must have t--e- L--- ---
-7.Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers However, all the league records were unfortunately destroyed in a fire. Thus we'll never know for whom
--- T---- b-----
-8.Church sign:Do not wait for the hearse to ---e --- to ------
-9.Mom: Little Joey, what are you doing in the house?
Isn't your baseball game today?
Little Joey: Yes, Mom, but when I rounded third base,
the ----- t--- -e to go ---e.
-10.Pearl: How was your blind date last night?
Shirl: Terrible. He showed up in a 1932 Rolls-Royce.
Pearl: Wow,that car must be worth a fortune!
What's so terrible about that?
Shirl: He's --e o------- o----.