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#943262 - 03/05/14 12:56 AM Hump Day's
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 29996
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
Mark Twain
~~~~~~~~~~

This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody.

There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it.

Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did.

Somebody got angry about this, because it was Everybody's job.

Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it.

It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done!
~~~~~~


3 men were walking home to there house one summer. They all lived right next to each other. All 3 of them had a large swimming pool. They were just getting ready to dive into the pool, when a genie popped out in front of them.

"It's your lucky day!" said the genie. "Just jump and say whatever drink you want, and the pool water will turn into it."

The first man jumped and said "Budweiser!" and he jumped into a pool of Budweiser.

The second man jumped and said "Coke!" and he jumped into a pool of Coke.

The third man jumped and said...

"Weeeeeeeee!!"




Umm, I'm guessing he jumped into a pool of wee? rolleyes
~~~~~~~~~~

Who Reads the Newspapers?
1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.

2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the
country.

3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the
country.

4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country
but don't really understand the Washington Post. They do, however,
like their statistics shown in pie charts.

5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn't mind running
the country, if they could spare the time, and if they didn't have to
leave LA to do it.

6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the
country and they did a far superior job of it, thank you very much.

7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren't too sure
who's running the country, and don't really care as long as they can
get a seat on the train.

8. The New York Post is read by people who don't care who's
running the country, as long as they do something really scandalous,
preferably while intoxicated.

9. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't sure
there is a country or that anyone is running it; but whoever it is,
they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions
if the leaders are handicapped minority feminist atheist dwarfs, who
also happen to be illegal aliens from ANY country or galaxy as long as
they are Democrats.

10. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another
country but need the baseball scores.

11. The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at the
grocery store.
~~~~~~

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, the creator of the world-famous detective Sherlock Holmes, was not above telling self- deprecating tales.

In one situation, he was waiting at a taxi stand outside the railway station in Paris. When a taxi pulled up, he placed his suitcase in the car and took a seat next to it.

"Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?" asked the taxi driver.

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver whether he knew him by sight.

"No, sir, I have never seen you before."

The puzzled Doyle asked him how he knew he was Conan Doyle.

"This morning's paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi-stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you're a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. And so, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle."

Doyle remarked, "This is truly amazing. You are a real-life counterpart to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes."

"There is one other thing," the driver said.

"What is that?"

"Your name is on the front of your suitcase."
~~~~~~~~~~


A young boy and his doting grandmother were walking along the sea shore when a huge wave appeared out of nowhere, sweeping the child out to sea.

The horrified woman fell to her knees, raised her eyes to the heavens and begged the Lord to return her beloved grandson.

Lo, another wave reared up and deposited the stunned child on the sand before her.

The grandmother looked the boy over carefully. He was fine.

But still she stared up angrily toward the heavens. "When we came," she snapped indignantly, "he had a hat!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. wave

Just started my two days off, YAHOO! But I've had a long day and I'm very tired. tired

Oh yeah, there was that sleeping pill thing too. sleep

Also I'm all talked out...... snicker

I hope you all have a happious maximus day. bravo


joe



Sleep.....sleep......need sleep.....sleep....sl sleep

_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#943265 - 03/05/14 02:05 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 01/08/06
Posts: 6033
Loc: Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Good morning Joe waveEnjoy your 2 days off! Don't know why I'm up so early woozyBut couldn't get back to sleep,so I put the coffee on I'll keep it hot!Happy day all lab
_________________________
I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.

Sue

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#943269 - 03/05/14 03:32 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 7617
Loc: Greece
Good morning,have all a happy day. wave happydance smile
_________________________

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#943273 - 03/05/14 05:53 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17045
Loc: Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Cailyn and Haroula. Wishing everyone a great day! wave
_________________________
Gerry

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#943276 - 03/05/14 06:03 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 5377
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Good morning and have a great day Joe, Cailyn, Haroula, Gerry and all who come in after me. wave

Sorry I missed yesterday. I was running late that morning and didn't have time to post. The most exciting thing I did yesterday was play episode 2 of The Walking Dead Season 2, which was fantastic. thumbsup Today, I'm off for yet another work whoosh in the freezing cold. shiver smile

Hope everyone here has a terrific Wednesday. winter

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#943278 - 03/05/14 06:07 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 17045
Loc: Marlborough USA
Enjoy your day too venus! wave
_________________________
Gerry

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#943280 - 03/05/14 06:59 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14354
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, enjoy your time off. yay

Sue, thanks for keeping the coffee hot.

Gerry, have a wonderful day.

Venus, wishing you an easy workday.

Haroula, happy day wishes to you.

Nan, hope your weather is still warmer so you can walk Sassy. It's just too cold here and Nina is getting bored. shiver

Good day wishes to all who come in and all who are on the way. Snow flurries expected along with the cold. winter
_________________________
Gail

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#943284 - 03/05/14 07:23 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 8035
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Hump day. Danish and Cinnamon Buns in the NC. lab
_________________________
Connie

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#943290 - 03/05/14 08:31 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
manxman Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/23/02
Posts: 14947
Loc: Unionville
Good morning boomers. wave Joe, hope you enjoy your 2 days off.
Hope everyone has a wonderful Wednesday smile
_________________________
Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.

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#943300 - 03/05/14 10:03 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: manxman]
Darlene Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 9340
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Enjoy your time off and have a happious maximus day, as well! smile

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

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#943308 - 03/05/14 10:50 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: Darlene]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 29996
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
Good morning everybody. wave

I don't know if I can share this link with everyone.

I think you have to have FaceBook.

EDIT - Non FaceBook Video.


It's very cute. A dog jumping in a pile of leaves. lab


I'm still having my coffee and waiting for it to warm up enough to get out. I don't know what I'll do except to get out and romp around with Baby. puppy

I've got house chores to do. Not too excited about that. thumbsdown

I've got humongous yard chores to do which I'm definitely not excited about. shame

Look for arrowheads maybe? yay

joe


Edited by BrownEyedTigre (03/05/14 11:06 AM)
Edit Reason: Added non face book video
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#943310 - 03/05/14 11:10 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 7180
Loc: San Diego, CA
Loved the Happy Dog video Joe! Gotta go find me a pile of leaves. Actually a pile of money would be better. Hunting for that now. dance
_________________________
WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.

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#943311 - 03/05/14 11:25 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
gymcandy1 Offline
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 29996
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
Thanks Ana! hearts

A pile of money would be good Sorta. thumbsup

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#943312 - 03/05/14 11:29 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 64760
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Hey Joe, I added a video for you in your post. Glad you got the day off! yay Enjoy whatever you choose to do.

Woke to another couple inches of snow. If it wouldn't be for the birds singing loudly, my buddy Rocky raccoon and his mate coming for his nightly corn again and the smell of skunk in the air I would not think spring is anywhere near. I don't even know what ground looks like anymore since we haven't seen it since before Christmas here. duh

I smashed my finger in a door last night and forgot about it until I got up this morning. It is swollen and very sore.


Nan, sorry that Bella is getting antsy. This has to be the least that I have ever taken my dogs out. I go every chance I can but the conditions to walk are less than ideal. I'm afraid after all this snow and ice is gone we will be flooded and muddy. lol

be back..
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#943317 - 03/05/14 11:57 AM Re: Hump Day's [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 42210
Loc: Alabama
Wonderful Wednesday ya'll puppy

Had a very long day yesterday. Popped up and ran around and then ran out to take Seagy to her Chemo. Couldn't find the map that Soot made me, so winged it. Was there All day and then headed home, trying to beat the dark to avoid driving by braille. Well, hit a traffic jam that kept us sitting for 40 minutes (bad wreck) and ended up driving home in the dark and in the rain. But, thanks to the grace of God, we made it in one piece. Then I just collapsed.

We got a good report though. She is considered in remission. Of course, we will continue chemo (stopping would most likelyt allow the cancer to come roaring back in a more aggressive form) and just enjoy each day. She could stay in remission for a couple of years (our hope), but our doc cautioned us that she has seen it last as little as 3 weeks. So, it's out of our hands and we will happily take what we get.

I'm making yogurt and doin a few things, but am mostly going to be trying to just sit and go "ahhhhh" as I have to go out to another doctor's appointment tomorrow. Friday will be picking up kids so today is my "me" day. wave
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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