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#952082 - 04/25/14 01:30 AM Joe's Friday
gymcandy1 Online   happy
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 29936
Loc: Mead, Oklahoma
Humor is just another defense against the universe.
Mel Brooks (1926 - )
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Great Witticisms

The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.

If you smoke after sex, you're doing it too fast.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.

Good girls get fat, bad girls get eaten.

We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile. You Will Be Assimilated.

Born free... taxed to death.

The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.

Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

A cat almost always blinks when hit in the head with a ball peen hammer.

There's too much blood in my alcohol system.

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.

WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.

If you can read this, I've lost my trailer.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.

I got a gun for my wife, best trade I've ever made.

So you're a feminist...Isn't that cute!

Anyone can give up smoking, but it takes a real man to face cancer.

If, a two letter word for futility

I don't care, I don't have to.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

To all you virgins, thanks for nothing.

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

Horn broken, watch for finger.

All men are idiots ... I married their king.

The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.

My kid had sex with your honor student.

Earth first...we'll mine the other planets later.

Give pizza chants.

Don't hit me. My lawyer's in jail.

This isn't burger king, you can't have it your way.

How can I be overdrawn, I still have checks!

If something goes without saying, LET IT!

If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.

Help wanted telepath: you know where to apply

Work is for people who don't know how to fish.

IRS We've got what it takes to take what you've got.

Hard work has a future payoff, laziness pays off now.

If you don't like the way I drive, get off the sidewalk.

Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.

Missing your cat? Try looking under my tires.

I love cats ... dead ones

I love cats ... they taste just like chicken

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

Where are we going? And why are we in this hand basket?

Keep honking, I'm reloading.

Cover me. I'm changing lanes.

Prevent inbreeding: ban country music.

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.

Spotted owl taste just like chicken.

Hang up and drive.

Happiness is a belt-fed weapon.

Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.

WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition.

This would be really funny if it wasn't happening to me.

I have the body of a god... Buddha!

I get enough exercise pushing my luck.

Auntie Em- Hate you, hate Kansas, taking dog. Dorothy

If you don't like the news, go out and make your own.

Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep

Guns don't kill people... but they make it real easy.

I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather ... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Tow-ers will be violated

If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.

Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.

Guns don't kill people, postal workers do.

Ask me about microwaving cats for fun and profit.

I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.

Friends don't let Friends drive Naked.

If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?

Respect vegetables, don't eat them.

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... till you can find a rock.

Sex on television can't hurt you... unless you fall off.

Cemeteries, life's dead end.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


I was thinking today. headscratch


Now I know why I don't do it more often. slapforehead


It was quite disturbing. sherlock


Maybe that's the very reason they say ignorance is bliss. crazy


I guess it's true. I once tried to get in a funny farm and they said I was way too serious. mad


I say they're nothing but a bunch of narrow minded clowns.


Have a happy day everyone. thumbsup


seriously

joe
_________________________
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

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#952084 - 04/25/14 01:53 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Global Moderator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 64410
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
lol Don't think too hard Joe! Get some sleep and see you later today.hearts

Happy Friday all!

Ana wave
_________________________
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

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#952088 - 04/25/14 02:05 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
Haroula Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 06/02/10
Posts: 7448
Loc: Greece
Have all a fantastic Friday. happydance wave
_________________________

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.



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#952093 - 04/25/14 02:26 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: Haroula]
Drmojo Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 12/04/04
Posts: 1754
Loc: Washington In the Wet corner
Hey ya Boom Boom buddies

Hi Joe, Ana and Haroula wave wave wave


Watched the tv show Vikings tonight
was good! next week is the end of season happydance


have a good day everyone~ Karen frenchie kitty puppy cat
_________________________
OSO live
OSO Love
++OSO Strong++



Peace be with you~

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#952108 - 04/25/14 04:06 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: Drmojo]
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 01/08/06
Posts: 5998
Loc: Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Good morning Joe,Ana,Haroula,Karen and all who follow waveCoffee is ready wishing everyone a great Friday! yay
_________________________
I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.

Sue

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#952110 - 04/25/14 04:57 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
Graduate Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 16830
Loc: Marlborough USA
bunny Good Morning Joe, Ana, Haroula, Karen, Cailyn and all on the way to the Diner. Wishing you all a stress free Friday! bunny
_________________________
Gerry

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#952126 - 04/25/14 07:11 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 7968
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Today is Yoga and Silver Sneakers. We leave for the week in the Keys tomorrow. Not sure if we have internet where we are staying. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful TGIF. Danish and French Toast in the NC. lab
_________________________
Connie

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#952136 - 04/25/14 07:59 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
GBC Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 14200
Loc: Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers

Joe, enjoy the day when you awake.

Ana, are you free today or is it a corner day?

Haroula, happy day wishes.

Sue, thanks for the most welcomed coffee.

Gerry, what is stress-free? Mine is not getting out of bed for the day. lol

Connie, Enjoy your week in the Keys. If we don't hear from you we'll know where you are anyway. Have a good time.

Dog walk then maybe some shopping later. Beautiful day here so maybe even some bike riding. Wishing everyone a wonderful day!
_________________________
Gail

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#952139 - 04/25/14 08:03 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
manxman Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/23/02
Posts: 14721
Loc: Unionville
Good Friday morning boomers. Hope everyone has a great day smile
_________________________
Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.

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#952167 - 04/25/14 10:05 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: manxman]
Darlene Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/10/00
Posts: 9288
Loc: Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Hope you don't have to think too much today! wink Have a happy Joe's Friday!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

It's Friday!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!
_________________________
You become what you think about. Change your thoughts, change your life. - Dko

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#952170 - 04/25/14 10:22 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Offline
GB Reviewer Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 42041
Loc: Alabama
Eeek, didn't sleep at all last night and eyes don't seem to want to focus this morning. Finished my first cup of coffee, so gearing up doggies for a walk, then home to feed, then off to get the Cully, then home to feed lunch, then off to get the Per, then home to make dinner prep and wait for Soot to come home and take over lol
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#952171 - 04/25/14 10:37 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
auntiegram Online   content
Adept Boomer

Registered: 06/10/06
Posts: 13505
Loc: northern Wisconsin
Joe enjoy your day off! Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day!

Ana hope that your head is better today now that the rain is moving on. Have a lovely day!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Karen it is getting to be that time for .....reruns. lol Have a lovely day!

Sue thanks for the coffee and have a lovely day!

Gerry have a lovely day!

Gail enjoy the nice while you can. Have a nice walk and fun shopping!! #Even a nice ride if you go and a lovely day!

Oh Connie a week in the keys, enjoy!!! Thanks for the danish and have a lovely day!

Manxman have a lovely day!

Darlene may all go smoothly and you have a lovely day!

L4l no sleep??? eek Hope the coffee does the trick. Sounds like a little busy day. Have a lovely day!

Abbi day!!

wave
Nan

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#952182 - 04/25/14 11:41 AM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 7057
Loc: San Diego, CA
Good news on the 'sister' front. My sis, who acquired a new boyfriend some months back (he a widower and she a widow at about the same time) is now living in sin. Such fun. He is slowly moving in to her place and they 'considered themselves married with the paperwork'. Awwwwww. He's a nice guy. Met him at Thanksgiving. Nice that they both found someone to play with. I'm happy for them.

In other news: Two of the final 3 indicted School Board members/contractors have plead guilty as of this morning. The big trial is set for 2 days from now and only one guy is a hold out. The final two from today are pretty much not going to get any bad stuff happening to them. They really were on the sidelines of the whole thing. Only misdemeanors and they get to KEEP the school board positions (unlike all the others who had to give them up forever and any other political offices). Good results here. Now we wait to see if the last guy takes a plea or not. He's looking at several felonies, up to 8 years in jail and huge fines. He's a contractor who gave bribes to the school district officials in return for getting contract jobs. It's almost over. Good.
_________________________
WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.

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#952190 - 04/25/14 12:25 PM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: Sorta Blonde]
Space Quest Fan Offline
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 02/17/01
Posts: 9393
Loc: Columbus,Ohio USA
Welcome to the weekend Boomers. happydance
_________________________
It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.

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#952215 - 04/25/14 01:52 PM Re: Joe's Friday [Re: gymcandy1]
Yankee Clipper Offline
Addicted Boomer

Registered: 08/27/04
Posts: 2021
Loc: Lexington, Texas
Sooo Sleeeepy today and that should not be because I slept right through last night. Oh well, this too shall pass. And have opted for the 2nd cup of coffee like L4L. We are soul sisters today but she does alot more in a day than I. The HDMI cable arrived this morning and what a difference 3$ makes. These are arty and beautiful and even if cables aren't the problem it's worth having them.



I researched a bit on Elder Scrollsonline -it's reminescent a bit of morrowind. I wonder if it's any good. Do you have to pay each month to play it? And is it for console.

It's time to join my pets and nap a bit.
_________________________
I wish I were a cat and belonged to me ~ My Aunt Helen Mary Rose

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