The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.
Jeff Foxworthy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tonight On TV

It seems each year television gets worse and worse, just look at what's on television tonight...

FOX
8:00 Real Humans in Real Pain
8:30 Feral Dingoes Eating Children on Tape
9:00 Jiggle It Beach
9:30 LA Chicks
10:00 Beverly Hills 90210: The 90,210th Episode



UPN
8:00 The Unwatchables
8:30 Voyage To The Bottom Of The Ratings
9:00 Theoretically Existing Show
9:30 Praying For Syndication
10:00 The Last Thing You'd Ever Want To Sit Through



WB
8:00 Where My Wife At?
8:30 Gittin' Yo Freak On
9:00 Me & My Psychic
9:30 Kids Suck The Darndest Things
10:00 Dawson's Clothes



ANIMAL PLANET
8:00 Incontinent Rhinos
9:00 Dan Taylor: Mongoose Optometrist
10:00 STAY!
10:30 The Best of STAY!



E!
8:00 Andy Gibb: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills
9:00 Margot Kidder: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills
10:00 Boy George: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills



ESPN2
8:00 Finland's Brutalest Men
8:30 Being Hit By A Trolley Regional Semifinals
9:00 60 Minutes Of Joe Theismann's Leg Breaking
10:00 Co-Ed Spread-Eagled Weight-Training From Maui



SCI-FI
8:00 Space: 1972
9:00 The Bermuda Triangle: Myth Or Fiction?
10:00 Mid-Budget Galaxy



LIFETIME
8:00 How Can I Choose Between My Daughters?
9:00 The Abused Wife Who Didn't Mean To Kill Her Policeman Husband In Self-Defense
10:00 The Boy Whose Mommy Watched Far Too Much Television



TNN
8:00 Well, I'll Be Dipped In Pig dung!
9:00 You Hush Up, Wanda Mae
9:30 Sheeeeeeee-It!
10:00 Hold 'Er Down While I Get The Rifle From The Truck



TELEMUNDO
8:00 Roberto Amorosa En Agua Caliente!
9:00 Whoomp! Donde Esta?
9:30 Goooooooooooooal!
10:00 Ai! Ai! Ai! Ai! Ai!
10:30 La Hora De Goya



PUBLIC ACCESS
8:00 Blurry Steve
8:30 Inaudible City Council Meeting
9:00 Do We Have A Caller On The Line? Hello?
9:30 The Best Of Lunch Menus
10:00 My Friend Made This Short Film
10:30 Men With Braids Speak Out
~~~~~~~~~~~

Tongue Twisters

We've all at one time or another given our best try at tongue twisters, have a look through this funny list and see how you do...

Randy wondered why Willie really wasn't well.

Sam saw six shiny silver spoons.

Giddy gophers greedily gobble gooey goodies.

Slippery slimy snakes slide slowly.

Six shiny snails sighed sadly.

Pretty Patty Piggy pickles plump pink peppers.

Cheryl say Cher's sheer shawl Sunday.

Six seals slick sick seals.

How much dope could the dope dealer deal if the dope dealer could deal dope?

Sheep shouldn't sleep in shacks.

I slitted a sheet, a sheet i slit now i sit on the sheet i slit.

I wish I had an Irish wrist watch to watch on my Irish wrist.

Stick a sticker where its sticky where a sticker once was stuck.

She sells sea shells by the sea shore

Sure, the ship's ship-shape sir!

Does the wristwatch shop shut soon?

Try saying these 10 times fast...

Caution Golfers Crossing

Sun Shine City

Toy Boat

Unique New York

Mixed Biscuits

Red Leather, Yellow Leather

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Too Far North

You design your Halloween costumes to fit over a snowsuit.

You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

You have 10 favourite recipes for elk, moose or deer meat.

You live in a house that has no front steps, yet the door is three feet above the ground.

Driving is better in the winter because the potholes get filled with snow.

You think everyone from the city has an accent.

You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie with only 8 buttons.

At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant.

The most effective mosquito repellent is a shotgun.

You frequently clean grease off your barbecue so the bears won't come up on your deck.

There is only one shopping plaza in town.

You find -40C a little chilly.

The trunk of your car doubles as a deep freezer.

Shoveling the driveway constitutes a great upper body workout.

There are two seasons: Liquid and Solid

Nine months of winter and three months of rough sledding.

Six inches of snow is still considered a heavy frost.

You actually 'get' these jokes, and forward them to all your Northern friends.
~~~~~~~~~

Too Much Of The 90's

Top signs you've had too much of the 90's...

Cleaning up the dining area means getting the fast food bags out of the back seat of your car.

Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that they do not have e-mail addresses.

Keeping up with sports entails adding ESPN's homepage to your bookmarks.

You have a "to do list" that includes entries for lunch and bathroom breaks and they are usually the ones that never get crossed off.

You have actually faxed your Christmas list to your parents.

Pick up lines now include a reference to liquid assets and capital gains.

You consider 2nd day air delivery painfully slow.

You assume the question to valet park or not is rhetorical.

You refer to your dining room table as the flat filing cabinet.

Your idea of being organized is multiple colored post-it notes.

Your grocery list has been on your refrigerator so long some of the products don't even exist any more.

You lecture the neighborhood kids selling lemonade on ways to improve their profits.

You get all excited when it's Saturday and you can wear sweats to work.

You refer to the tomatoes grown in your garden as deliverables.

You find you really need PowerPoint to explain what you do for a living.

You normally eat out of vending machines and at the most expensive restaurant in town within the same week.

You think that "progressing an action plan" and "calendarizing a project" are acceptable English phrases.

You know the people at the airport hotels better than you know your next door neighbors.

You ask your friends to "think out of the box" when making Friday night plans.

You think Einstein would have been more effective had he put his ideas into a matrix.

You think a "half-day" means leaving at 5 o'clock.

You hear most of your jokes via email instead of in person.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie.


Welcome to a new week!


I just love a new day. I like looking toward the future.......to my next day off.


So few and so very far between.


I am forever under the boot of the oppressive, and greedy corporations.


It's a little unfashionable, but I must say I wear the footprints quite nicely, and it pays the bills.


I really need to go get ready for another one of these workdays.


I need to wash the boot prints off my cheek.


Have a happy day ever body.



joe

Have a great Monday Joe.

Hi, I decided to pop in for my annual visit. This is post number 39. I am well on my way to 100, so I will no longer be a Shy Boomer.

It's not Monday for me yet, but Sunday night. Venus and I just watched Orphan Black, which is a great show. We're going to watch The Last of Us by the Let's Player, Cry, who is very funny. Venus says she won't play the game because the fighting would be too hard, but it's fun to watch the story. It reminds me a little bit of The Walking Dead, which is one of my favorite games.

I'm going to have to end this now, so I can get to post number 40 because I'm on a roll now. Have a great day, Gameboomers.

Hope you get a day off soon, Joe. You want one of mine? They cut my hours too far back.

Have a great day, Space Quest.

@Thorsgoats - Well, okay then, rack up that post count. I decided to sneak this post in before you got back to watch the "show."

As for me, I'm off tomorrow. More singing and gaming awaits me. And perhaps some kitty play as well.

Have a great Monday, everyone.

Good morning and happy Monday Joe, SpaceQ, Thorsgoats, Venus and all!

I'll be in the corner and hopefully at the chiropractor at some point. I hope that you all have a stress-free and happy Monday!

Ana

Good morning Joe, SpaceQ, Thorsgoats, Venus, Anna and
all who follow later.
Have all a great day.

Good Morning Joe, SpaceQ, Thorsgoats, venus, Ana and Haroula. Happy Day Joe and SpaceQ. Thorsgoats I love Orphan Black. It's on Saturday night here. Venus hope you squeezed in some kitty play time! Ana I hope all is well with you. Haroula have a great day. Coffee is hot and ready. Happy Day wished for everyone!

Good morning everyone. To all here and all that follow, have a Great start to the new week. Danish and Muffins in the NC.

Good Morning Boomers

Joe, wishing you an easy workday today.

Space, good morning.

Thorsgoats, have a great day!

Venus, sorry your work hours got cut. Have a good day.

Ana, hope the corner is easy for you today.

Haroula, happy day wishes.

Gerry, much needed coffee this morning. Thanks.

Connie, Danish works!

Beautiful day here today. A nice dog walk then lots to do outdoors. Wishing everyone a wonderful day!

Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers and hope your work day goes smoothly!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!

Magnificent Monday ya'll

Hot, hot, hot...too hot for the monkeys. Seagy and I are heading out in a second for a white blood cell count. Hopefully, we will get our van back from the shop today, and I will take me (but not the dogs) out for a walk.

I was up too late last night reading (tummy hurt, couldn't sleep so might as well read). Not sure what I will be doing other than vet and car. We shall see what the day brings

Ana, I hope the chiro can help.

Thorsgoat, so glad you stopped by for your annual contribution. Try living on the wild side and making it quarterly and those post will add up before you know it

Hooray for you Thorsgoats! At this rate, in another 20 years or so and you will not be shy anymore.

Penelope the Peacock met me for breakfast. She seems to love taking a grape from my hand, but runs away after eating it. Such a decision. Keep or not keep. She's not really mine but stays here all day and most of the night. She actually has a schedule. 8 am here for feeding (when I do the Outdoorsies) and then promptly at 8 pm she walks down the driveway or jumps over the front fence and goes around the fence dividing me from my favorite neighbor, and goes who knows where. Probably to dig around for bugs in her yard, or maybe she goes farther towards what I assume is her 'first' home. Dunno. Just trying to catch her. Have a bunch of grapes now hanging IN the cage and hoping she will go in and start pecking at them. We shall see. It's so time consuming trying to catch a wild bird!

Was going to get a haircut today but then decided I'd trim it myself. Easier when they do it professionally, but I was afraid the gal would cut major length off (sometimes they do no matter what you tell them) and I'm trying to keep it long for summer and grow out the layers. Last time, I said 'don't touch the layers'. And of course the nice gal went to work shortening everything and layering it oh so nicely. It's taken me 2 months to get some semblance of thickness back. Good cut, just not what I envisioned. Phooooo! So I did it myself, didn't touch the back, just the bangs and sides. It's not bad.

Off to play with my new security camera. Definitely was the nasty across the street neighbor's new install of the full ATT package that was interfering with my wireless cameras. I'll keep them in storage for the happy day when he decides to move. I hope it's soon. Only 2 more kids to graduate from school and then maybe they will all go away.

Up and off to get those pearlies white!! Then ran a couple errands and now home. We have HUD coming in August so they are fixing things up around here. Should come more oftend.

Joe may work go well. Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day!

Space have a lovely day!

Thorsgoats keep up the posting! Have a lovely day!

venus sounds like a nice day is planned for your day off. Enjoy! Have a lovely day!

Ana here's hoping that the shoulder is a little better this morning and that you can get an appointment and that does the trick! May the corner be kind and the puzzles easy! Have a lovely day!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Gerry thanks for the coffee and have a lovely day!

Connie thanks for the danish and have a lovely day!

Gail it is beautiful here also today! Have a nice walk with the dog and enjoy the work in the yard! Have a lovely day!

Darlene may work go smoothly and you have a lovely day!

L4l good luck at the Vets and hope the van is done. Have a lovely day!

Sorta I think she has adopted you for the day time. Have a lovely day!


Nan

Hey Sorta, is it peacocks or geese who keep nasty punks away or maybe both. Who knows someday she may save you from a break-in. There are so many trees here for a peacock and I'd get 2 or 3 more so she would have friends........oh well. I wonder what me kits would think about them.

Hotsky hot here too. Siesta weather and still much better than winter.

I'm so mad at my game, wolfenstein. Yesterday a caption appeared they were redoing my profile -why? and it stripped my hero of all his collectibles and extra health and armor. Why, I didn't do anything. Now I must contend with powerful adversaries and stingy armor and health. I will limp through then replay on a more difficult level as it's easier after playing once.

Happy Monday all

Back from the vet followed by a very hot walk.

Vet said my girl looks good. WBC are extremely low, but we knew they would be as this med does that but everything else was great.

It was much too hot to be out there walking but thought it would help with the tummy ache and it did. Just must get up early..if I say that often enough, perhaps I will do it.

Van is supposed to ready around 4. Hubby will try to pick it up and go back to work (so he can inspect) but if he can't get away, I'll take up the slack.

Afternoon all; temps quite cool with wind, which is blowing the not yet ripened plums of my plum trees. Actually had to clip the heat on the other morning.

Have a great beginning of the week.

Good afternoon Boomers.

Eeek, Trippy, hope they ripen in the kitchen.

Afternoon, Space

Good afternoon boomies! Hubby just got done installing a new router for me. I lost you all for most of the day. I had to keep rebooting every fifteen minutes. It was a lovely day but I was in the corner with no escape so I missed it.

Daughter is on her way over to visit so I have to say hi quickly. Hope you all had a happy Monday!

Hey everybody.

I got off at 1:30 today and came home to a full house.

My brother, sister, niece, and grandniece are all here.

Trying to go through the house and get the ball rolling on repairs.

I'll be back to post Tuesday's soon.

Have a good evening.

joe

Ana, so glad your computer is happier. Happy 'puter = happy mama

Joe, is everyone there to help work?

Hubby is out for dinner for work. I'm off to feed doggies and then may collapse. That walk this afternoon took it out of me!

It's been a good day. After last weeks find of a lovely 2 sided stainless sink for 13 bucks for my back tenant/friend (it's a large side and small side type) I came home to find him working on it. Cleaning, removing the remaining drain. He needed a bigger wrench and some 'advice' on how to use WD40 and a small hammer to loosen the huge nut. WE got it off and now he's waiting for some really nice faucets to arrive. He's got 'plans'. Nice. I didn't think he would want to remove the old sink and install a new one, but he's really excited. It will look great when done and I will have the old sink as a spare. Two deep sides wasn't working for him down there. I hate two sides. Can't get a huge dish into them or a big pot. This one is perfect. Used, but nice. Shopping trip later (after his faucets arrive) to buy whatever fittings he will need. Definitely need one drain assembly. Had one new one and then he decided to rip out the other one so we could be sure it wasn't going to leak. Good idea. Start fresh.

Penelope is up on the roof.

Starting fresh is always good.

Hi guys. Checking in to read what's been happening here at the diner. Worked this evening at the Blisses. Had a few words with Mike Bliss. He yells now and then, but I don't take it anymore without expressing my opinion. Ended on a good note. I have an another early shift tomorrow. Mike asked for a big breakfast but it all depends on how early he comes down from sleeping the night. Sometime he just doesn't get up in time for a big breakfast. We'll see in the morning if he makes it early enough for me to cook his favorite.

It's getting late so I'll say good night all. See you in the morning. Sleep well.

Midgie

Ana were you able to make an appointment and is it any better? HUGS!

Night all sleep well and pleasant dreams!


Nan